Assassinatrix: I have never attempted to write a story on the Specters before... and since I write humor stories more often than other genres... expect plenty of OOC (out-of-character) from them! Now, who should I torment- I mean, pick to do the disclaimer? Okay, go Cheshire, I choose YOU!
Cait Sith Cheshire: Meow? Why me?
Assassinatrix: Because you're so cute!
Cheshire: ... Assassinatrix doesn't own Saint Seiya or any of the characters and techniques in it. She is, however, responsible for the destruction she will cause-
Assassinatrix: That's not true! Anyway, here's the story...
The Three Judges stood in the middle of the clearing, confused. They were dead, killed by the Saints... or so they thought. But if Hades-sama had revived them, then why were they here, in the middle of a forest?
Aiacos was the first to speak up, "This is a nice change of scenery. Lots of green stuff. Fresh air. Ya think Hades-sama gave us a day off?"
The Wyvern Specter glared at Aiacos and muttered, "The day we get a day off is the day we win the War..."
"Well, we are the Three Judges of Hell... maybe we did something to deserve a break. Ever thought about that, Rada?" Minos took a step back and nearly tripped over a tree root. He swore and cussed, making Aiacos and Radamanthys give him a O_o expression.
Minos glared at the tree root and said, "This day isn't going well."
"It took you 1 minute to figure that out? You are such a genius, Minos."
"Oh, shut up! But Aiacos is right... the air here does smell fresher. Man, you'd think someone would've installed a ventilation system in the Underworld. We're breathing in the same stale air from thousands of years ago!"
"Yeah, yeah, and the grass is greener on the other side."
"But Rada... it is greener on the other side. Look at Aiacos."
They both turned to look at Aiacos, who had gotten down on his knees and was picking at a blade of grass. So focused on the "task" he was, that he failed to notice the other two's stares until someone dropped out of the sky and nearly crushed him.
"Eh?" Aiacos pushed the other person off his back and asked, "what the hell? Is this a joke?"
"I'm not dead?" the new arrival asked, confused as well. It was Behemoth Violate, who had died in the 18th century and for some reason, had been dragged to this time and place.
Minos snickered at Aiacos' dilemma, "Heh heh, Aiacos... I thought you'd never be a chick magnet... so what's this, you can make women appear from thin air as well?"
"No, but I can make men disappear into thin air. Want to see that?" Aiacos held up a hand and showed Minos the finger.
"Why don't you two blockheads cool it, and focus on-" Radamanthys only got through half the sentence before two Specters fell from the sky and landed on him.
Before he could stop himself, Aiacos let slip a devilish grin. Unfortunately for him, Radamanthys saw it. "See something funny? Aiacos?"
"Oh, no, not at all. But whereas I had a beautiful lady fall for me, you had two big, strong men falling for you." Aiacos said, smiling all the way. His smile wilted when Radamanthys got up and started chasing him around the clearing. Twice the Wyvern Specter nearly caught him by his Surplice's wing, and twice he evaded the attack by dodge-rolling. Which, for a man in armor, was extremely difficult. Not to mention awkward.
Violate watched them for a while, worried for Aiacos, before deciding that he would be alright. She looked at the two new Specters. They were Harpy Valentine and Basilisk Sylphid, two of Radamanthys' strongest subordinates. And they were both out-cold.
Minos couldn't help putting his two cents in on the event. "It seems like Specters are falling out of the sky like meteorites."
"Then maybe you should be careful too, Minos-sama. Meteorites don't have eyes." Violate told him.
"Don't worry, my fair lady, I have Hades-sama's protection. Nothing bad could ever possibly happen to- OOF!"
As foretold by Violate, another Specter dropped from the sky and flattened the Gryphon Specter. His claim that Hades had granted him protection became one big fat lie. He got to his feet quickly, "I, er, wanted that to happen."
"Of course you did, sir. That's your loyal subordinate, Necromancer Byaku."
"Wait, who?" Minos stared at Byaku, "who are you and why did she say you're my subordinate?"
Byaku gave him a hurt expression, "But Minos-sama... I am your loyal subordinate! You... don't remember me?"
By this time, Radamanthys had caught up to Aiacos, and was busy punching his lights out. Violate ran to rescue him, blocking the next blow with her forearm. Aiacos grinned at Violate, "So you're not the damsel-in-distress type? We could get along well!"
"What are you talking about, Aiacos-sama? I have never been a 'damsel in distress' before. And never will be."
While Byaku was busy trying to prove that he was, indeed, Minos' subordinate, Valentine and Sylphid have both woken up and were asking questions between themselves.
Valentine: We seem to have been teleported.
Sylphid: The last thing I remembered was getting my butt kicked by the Libra Saint.
Valentine: Good for you... I got whipped by that b*tch Pandora.
Sylphid: She killed you?
Valentine: Uh. Not exactly.
Sylphid: Then who did?
Valentine: You promise not to tell anyone?
Sylphid: *sweatdrop* Do I want to hear this?
Valentine: Well... Radamanthys-sama killed me.
Sylphid: O_O Why? You were one of us! Or... maybe you were a spy for the Saints!
Valentine: *facepalm* No! That Pandora woman tried to see Radamanthys-sama, but he was... not in a state for seeing anyone. So I refused entry to her, and she got catty, and she tortured me. And then when Radamanthys-sama came out, he agreed with that b*tch and so... I died.
Sylphid: ... I feel you, man. That shouldn't have happened to someone like you.
Valentine: Yeah... is that Radamanthys-sama over there? Why is he beating up Aiacos-sama?
Radamanthys had pushed Violate to one side and continued to punch Aiacos, who blocked most of the blows and tried to talk some sense into the Wyvern. "Aw, c'mon, Rada, it was a joke! We all know you'd have plenty of women going for you... in fact, why don't you shave your unibrow into two? That would guarantee a year's worth of girls-"
Minos, to one side, shook his head in mock sadness, "Poor Aiacos... that man doesn't know when to quit."
Violate, getting desperate, used her Kagenui technique on the Wyvern Specter, stopping him cold. He turned to Violate and snarled, "You stay out of this, woman!"
"Wow... that's some real tact you have there, Rada. No wonder you don't get many dates- erk!" Minos started running for his life as Radamanthys broke free from Violate's Kagenui and began throttling him.
"STOP GOING ON ABOUT MY PERSONAL LIFE! IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!"
"Ack! Let's... talk... things... nicely... shall we?" Minos tried to placate Radamanthys.
"I put up with you two douchebags because you were both Judges... I tried to be 'professional'... but you two jokers have gone overboard this time! Prepare to pay in BLOOD!"
Aiacos ignored Minos' suffering and turned his attention to Violate. "Well, hi there, I don't believe we've ever met?"
Violate stared at him as though he had just danced kan-kan on top of a carousel. "Aiacos-sama... you don't remember anything?"
"I'd remember meeting a woman that I like, so yeah, I don't think so."
Violate looked sad for a while. Then she cleared her throat, "Well, regardless of that, I will always be your wing, my lord, even in death!"
Aiacos gave her a O_o look and retreated a few steps, "Er... okay..."
Meanwhile, Radamanthys had cooled down somewhat, and had stopped strangling Minos in time for him to remain alive. The Gryphon Specter had gone as white as his hair, and was trying to say something.
"I think we're in the future." Valentine thought aloud. Everyone turned to look at him. He glanced at them, and went on, "I mean, most of us are in the future. But the Three Judges are in their own time. That's why they don't remember us. They're from the next Holy War."
"You should be a story-teller, you know, Valentine? You have a really vivid imagination..." Sylphid half-laughed, then saw Valentine glaring at him. "Oh. You're serious now. Sorry. Yeah, it could be true. Maybe Chronos* decided to play a trick on us."
"Maybe you would like to tell Chronos to shove his cosmic jokes up his a**!" Minos retorted. He had recovered from his near-death. "I hate having people land on me. I'm not meant for that, I'm the Heavenly Noble Star!"
Aiacos sneered, "Right, right... and you hate mingling with non-nobles like Rada and myself, is that it?"
"Er, no," Minos replied quickly, seeing Radamanthys start getting mad again.
"But, the real problem is... where ARE we?" Violate asked. She looked around, "All I see are trees."
"And all I see is a beautiful lady," Minos tried to chat her up. Violate ignored him, to his dismay. Aiacos, behind her back, shot her a look of admiration.
"Why don't we all start walking in one direction? This forest can't extend endlessly. We'll get out of it somewhere." Aiacos suggested.
So all of them started walking in the direction he had pointed to. Hours passed. Then they reached a clearing.
"What a genius you are, Aiacos. You surprise me with your brilliance sometimes," Radamathys glared at the Garuda Specter, who noticed the footprints on the ground and managed to look chagrined. They were right back where they started. And the sun had just gone down, leaving them in darkness.
Minos, being the casa-nova that he was, immediately siddled up to Violate's side and declared, "Do not be afraid, lady! I will defend you from the nocturnal horrors!"
Violate gave him a weirded-out stare and replied, "I don't need anyone to defend me."
"Just pretend that you do," Minos hissed quietly. Violate shrugged, "Whatever."
Aiacos noticed what Minos was trying to do and he pointed, "Hey, playboy, get your own girl! This one is mine!"
"Says you." Minos sneered.
"Says I," Violate walked towards Aiacos and stood beside him. Minos raised his hands in surrender, "Fine. Have it your way. You'll regret not choosing me."
As the moon rose in the sky, the Specters set up camp in the clearing, digging out shallow trenches to sleep in.
All the other Specters seemed stunned by the deep trench that Aiacos was digging.
"What are you doing, Aiacos?" Radamanthys asked wearily, knowing what idiocy his two comrades exhibit sometimes.
Aiacos replied, "I figured a deeper trench would give me better protection..."
Minos shouted, "LIAR! You're planning to use that trench to make out with your girl, aren't you?"
At this, Violate looked up from the trench she was sitting in, and retorted, "Of course he wouldn't. Aiacos-sama would never do such a lowdown thing like that!"
"I, er... that is..." Aiacos grinned sheepishly, "well, I was hoping she'd spend the night with me-"
"You wouldn't!" Violate's eyes widened.
"What if I said 'please'? Would you do it, then?"
That night, all the Specters were kept awake. Violate sat fuming in her own trench, while Aiacos was in his trench singing a love-song out-of-tune. Apparently, Violate let him know her displeasure... through her fists. She had been reluctant in dispensing violence to her lord, up till the point when he asked for the other Specter's help in persuading her.
The other Specters turned their backs toward Aiacos and tried to ignore his singing. Minos, at least, partially succeeded and fell asleep. Then he was rudely awakaned by Aiacos hitting a high note... and failing to reach it properly.
"Congratulations, Aiacos... you've just dug your own grave." Radamanthys growled, and slowly got up from his trench, as Aiacos started off a new song.
TO BE CONTINUED...
*Chronos is the chthonic Greek god of time. He appeared in Saint Seiya: The Next Dimension.
Assassinatrix
Aiacos: Why did you make me look stupid?
Assassinatrix: I'm only harsh on you because you're my favorite character!
Aiacos: Well... un-favorite me this instant! I resent being made a fool of-
Assassinatrix: Next chapter will be about you getting bashed, if you don't shut up. *evil smile*
Aiacos: Ack! Okay...
