If I owned Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog, you can bet it wouldn't have ended the way it did.
"Of the human race?"
"It's not a... perfect metaphor..."
Other than the fact that he wouldn't stop texting, he was pretty nice. She wondered how she'd never really noticed him at the laundromat-
-Captain Hammer was so handsome, and he'd saved her life. Did you notice that he threw you in the garbage? Was this what love at first sight felt like?
They had dinner that night at the homeless shelter. They got along incredibly well. Did you see how he looked at the people in there? Like they had some kind of disease.
The next day he took her on a date. He, Captain Hammer, took her, Penny, on a date. They went to the park and had frozen yogurt, her treat. Can't he afford to buy his own frozen yogurt? This was wonderful, incredible. Things were really starting to look up. Amazing how you're gushing over this like a little girl. Is he really that great?
"-at first I thought he was totally cheesy-"
"-trust your instincts-"
He was the only one. Everyone else had been excited, overjoyed, jealous of her-
"What?"
"Like pie."
-but Billy remained skeptical. He didn't like Captain Hammer. Why didn't he like Captain Hammer? Maybe Captain Hammer isn't that likable.
"You're driving the spork into your leg."
"So I am. Hilarious." He laughed, but it was forced.
"Everything happens-"
"Don't say 'for a reason'."
"No, just... everything happens."
"Not to me."
He looked so hopeless. Probably the way she had looked the last time she got fired. Maybe worse. Probably worse. Definitely worse.
She just had to cheer him up somehow-
-they leaned in toward each other-
-she couldn't kiss Billy, she was Captain Hammer's girlfriend! She needed to interrupt somehow-
"It's like Captain Hammer always says-" Smooth, Penny. Real smooth.
A scoff. "Right. How are things with cheesy-on-the-outside?"
"Good. They're good." But she wasn't so sure anymore-
-she glanced over from her laundry. Captain Hammer had his arm around Billy's shoulder and was saying something to him. Billy had a hollow look in his eyes.
She didn't dare go over and interrupt. Why? Scared of Captain Hammer, Penny?
-and now they were leaving the laundromat. "I noticed you were talking to Billy?"
"Oh, just some guy stuff. Nothing you need to worry about."
One of your best friends looked like he'd just seen someone get shot, and it's 'nothing you need to worry about'?
Maybe Captain Hammer wasn't the hero everyone said he was.
She'd have to think about it.
"I guess he's pretty okay..."
The door opened, and she turned.
It wasn't Billy.
Where was Billy?
It wasn't like him to be late for a... a date?
She looked at his frozen yogurt. It was melting.
The door opened, and she turned.
It still wasn't Billy.
"-yeah, we totally had sex-"
She was mortified. Absolutely, completely, and totally mortified. Penny exit, stage right... No one even noticed. How do you like being in his shadow, Penny? Is this what you want? To be just Captain Hammer's girlfriend? Forever?
She stood in the hallway as he gave his speech-
-was that Billy's voice? She hadn't seen Billy in the crowd.
She peeked inside.
Dr. Horrible was there. Captain Hammer was frozen in a beam of light from a ray in the back of the room.
She had to do something.
"I don't see Penny-"
Penny. How did he know her?
The ray was plugged in right in front of her- she could save the day. Oh, you really think you'll get any credit?
"-head up, Billy, buddy, there's no time for mercy-"
Everything clicked.
Doctor Horrible is Billy.
Billy is Doctor Horrible.
A split second decision.
One or the other.
Captain Hammer, the jerk.
Billy, the sweet guy from the laundromat.
Captain Hammer, the hero.
Doctor Horrible, the villain.
"-here goes no mercy-"
She pulled the plug-
-Captain Hammer picked up the death ray and pointed it at Dr. Horrible Billy.
"Wait-"
"I don't have time for your warnings."
-he pulled the trigger-
-and the world exploded.
Thoughts?
