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The Phobia Challenge (by Tranquillezza)
Pairing: MoriRenge
Fanclub (optional): SIE
Phobia: Autophobia/Monophobia (Fear of Being Alone)
If there is one thing Renge is afraid of, it's being alone.
Anything is better than being alone—it hurts too much, hurts too long, and everything is so dead and scary and gone. She knows that there's nothing wrong with being alone and it happens, but every time it hits her, she doesn't know how to get it away.
(It's frightening.)
Even though there is nothing to lose, she feels something slipping, going away from her grasp. She knows that there's nothing to lose in the first place.
But it's still frightening as ever.
She could feel the loneliness, the pain and the oh god I'm dying breathing on her neck like a beast marking its prey.
As scary as it is, she's sure she's been prey for it more times that she could, would, should.
This is the worst thing that could happen to her.
………………………………………
When she was younger, stronger, innocent, she wasn't scared of anything.
She was all-powerful and hopeful. She was not one to fall before anybody. She had no weaknesses.
(Or so she thought.)
She was alone when everything happened. Where the nightmares started to where the nightmares ended; she was stranded in the middle of nowhere with all sides blocked, barricaded and she couldn't run and where was she supposed to hide? Her instincts ran wild, telling her to run away where she could, to not stay in that one place where she was alone and nobody was there and everybody was gone.
(Why do people leave her?)
She was an immortal wishing to die; a deer in the spotlight, where it tried to run but had died by the hunter's gun. She was a doll wishing for life.
She was nothing.
Only a piece of paper in records; only the daughter of a famous company, only a Houshakuji. She'll die and become ashes, ashes, spread to the ground, all by herself for eternity.
(She is that and nothing more.)
…………………………………
His presence was calming, like those fragrances she would obtain to feel relaxed; relaxed in the middle of her death, her demise.
She knew that he was going to be gone someday; he would be gone with his Mitsukuni and she'd be all alone again, alone in her world of dying immortals.
The only queen of the world; the only human in the world. She was the ruthless tyrant that stole lives for herself, bathing in blood and sweet ballads.
"Why don't you talk?" she would ask, her eyes staring straight at him, right into those deep eyes of his.
He would shrug in reply, his answer stark and sharp. "Why are you afraid of being alone?" he asked with that stare, looking at her as if trying to decipher her.
She smiled slightly. She knew that he was asking a rhetorical question, and she had also shrugged in response. It was always like this when they were together; silent but calming, like waves in the ocean.
(Silence is always most dangerous.)
But he was like a guard of the beasts, taming it to nothing.
And there was nothing to bother her when he was gone.
It still attacked when she was most vulnerable.
Her demise was never short of nothing.
It was dragged, long and painful and so like death's cruel scythe.
It always slashed at her, all mean and cruel and so full of paradox (who said death was kind?) that it scared her how wrong man could be.
(She's losing, losing, losing.)
"I think I'm dying." she would say, her voice so full of saccharine and fake-sweetness, all bitter and dying and cruel like death.
"I think I'm dying," her echo would reply.
Her eyes widened as she gasped in surprise.
"...I...am..." she breathed out, half-happy to be dead, half-sad to be gone.
…Done. xD;;
Sucks, yeah?
…Review please.
:D
…Please? :P
This was really fun to write though. XD
