One of Spock's biggest problems wasn't dating human, James T. Kirk. Having known Jim for four years, dating him for three, he was pretty used to the way he acted by now.
Spock's problem was being able to keep Jim as his.
After being in a romantic relationship for so long, Spock thought Jim was starting to get a bit bored of being with him. And he wasn't just crazy or anything. Lately he's noticed Jim going out to bars more on shore leave and flirting with the female, and even male, crew members.
Does being a serious, logical Vulcan make him seem boring? Does Jim need someone more fun like himself?
That's what Spock thought. He decided it might be time to embrace his human side more to show Jim he was worth keeping around.
1. Hand Holding
"Captain, I must advise you to be very careful when beaming down. We know very little about this planet." Spock said with great worry in his voice as he followed his captain and lover down the corridor to the transporter room.
"I will. Stop worrying. It's going to be alright."
"It is impossible for you to know what will happen when you beam down. It could be very dangerous. Please-" Spock cut himself off.
Jim stopped walking and turned to look at Spock. He was a bit irritated at this point, "What, Spock?"
Spock thought about his next move for a moment before looking down at Jim's hand and taking it in his own. Jim looked at their hands as Spock intertwined their fingers. After a second or two, they both looked back up at each other.
"Jim," Spock started, "Please, I need you to be very cautious. I want you safe. I do not what I would do if I were to lose you." Spock shifted his gaze, slightly embarrassed that other crew members in the corridor could see and hear him. It is very unlike a Vulcan to show so much affection.
Jim just stared at him intently for a moment before sincerely saying, "I promise I will be careful." Jim gave him a quick kiss on the lips, "Are you feeling alright, Spock?"
Jim knew it was very unlike Spock, or any Vulcan for that matter, to hold hands or show so much emotion. He knew Spock was half Vulcan but he never talks like this.
"Yes," Spock answered, "I am fine. We must get you to the transporter room."
Spock started walking and pulling Jim along. Jim was still a bit confused so it took him a minute to process what Spock was doing but once he did, he moved a bit faster to match Spock's pace as they walked hand in hand to the transporter room.
Jim wasn't sure why Spock wanted to hold hands; he knew Vulcans had very sensitive hands but he didn't question it.
2. Hugging
A few days later, Jim and a landing party are sent down to another planet. A couple of seconds after they beam down, they were of course, the transporter malfunctioned.
Luckily, it was easy to fix and would only take Scotty a few minutes. Jim and the rest of the landing party would have to survive until was in the transporter room with Scotty as he tried to fix the problem.
"Mr. Scott, I suggest you work quickly. The Captain's and crew members lives are in danger." Spock told Scotty.
"Aye, I'm working as fast as I can!" Scotty shouted back. A few moments later Scotty exclaimed, "Got it!"
He quickly beamed the captain and the landing party back up.
As soon as Spock saw him, he exclaimed "Jim!" and almost ran up to the transporter pad and wrapped his arms around his lover.
Jim was taken back by the gesture. He stood there dazed and confused, still trying to catch his breath from running, before wrapping his arms around Spock's torso.
"Spock, I'm fine. I really am." Jim said as he rubbed Spock's back lightly, trying to reassure him. Him and the other crew members only had a few cuts and bruises; they were pretty good at defending themselves.
Spock hugged him a bit tighter, "I am aware and I am glad you are safe."Spock awakwardly pulled away from the hug and backed up until there was a respectable distance between them, "You should get to your quarters and clean up immediately. I will be at my station on the bridge." Everyone in the room watched as Spock exited.
Jim kept staring at the door, "Well, let's take his advice and go clean ourselves up."
The other members of the landing party silently exited the room but Jim stood still. He remembered he wasn't alone when Scotty finally spoke up, "A Vulcan hugging someone. That's not something you see everyday. Even if he is half human and your boyfriend, it's still..."
Jim stepped down from the transporter pad, "Weird. I know."
3. Kisses
The next day, Spock walked onto the bridge ready for his shift. He stepped off the turbolift with a "Good morning, Captain."
Jim turned around his chair to see Spock walking towards him.
"Good morning, Mr. Spock." He replied. They both liked to remain very professional while on shift.
Spock stopped in front of the captain's chair as Jim stepped down from the chair to stand in front of Spock.
"How are you today?" Jim asked him. He was still a bit confused over Spock's actions the past few days and what was about to happen next was not going to help.
"I am fine today." Spock replied slowly, giving himself time to decide if he should actually do what he was about to. He wasn't sure if he should do while on shift.
But he did it anyways. Spock slowly leant forward and placed both hands gently on Jim's arms as he lightly placed a kiss on Jim's cheek. He lips hovered over Jim's cheek for a moment before he leaned back to see a somewhat confused look on Jim's face. Spock pulled his arms back and turned to go to his station without another word. Jim was about to say something but decided not to. Instead he quickly looked around to see if anyone noticed. Everyone was quietly working at their stations so he assumed they didn't.
Jim really didn't know what to think of that. It was not something Spock would normally do especially on shift. They had kissed the human way many times before but Jim was usually the one to initiate it. If Spock did initiate a human kiss, it was usually on the lips. This kiss was on the cheek.
Jim sat back down in his chair.
'That was weird.' Jim thought to himself, 'That was very un-Spock like. It was actually very un-Vulcan like. It seems like Spock's been doing a lot of that latley.'
4. Sleeping
Jim slowly stumbled into his and Spock's shared quarters after a very long day on shift. He found Spock meditating silently on the bed. He didn't want to disrupt Spock, so sleeping was out of the question. He decided to try to get some paperwork finished until Spock was done meditating. He sat down at his desk and quietly got to work.
Jim was about only 10 minutes into doing paperwork when he started to get really tired. He put his head down on the desk and closed his eyes. He only meant to rest his eyes but after a few minutes, he fell asleep.
Jim opened his eyes just a crack when he felt himself starting to move. He didn't exactly know what happened; he didn't remember falling asleep. As he opened his eyes as much as he could, he found himself being carried by Spock. He tried to say something but was far to tired.
A moment later, he felt himself being set down. He was lying on something soft and comfortable. It was their bed, he realized. He then was covered by the warmth of the blankets. He shut his eyes completely and was ready to fall back asleep.
Jim was expecting Spock to go to sleep on his side of the bed like usual. Being half Vulcan, Spock didn't like being to close to anyone while sleeping.
But tonight was much different.
Spock moved closer to his lover so Jim's back was pressed against Spock's chest. Spock carefully wrapped his arms around Jim's waist and pulled him as close as possible.
Jim tried to open his eyes and look at the man holding him, "Spock, what are you-"
Spock cut him off before he could finish, "Quiet. Go to sleep, T'hy'la."
Jim was much too tired to argue, so he just let his head fall on the pillow and went to sleep. Spock nuzzled up close to Jim and did the same.
Jim decided he would find a time tomorrow to ask Spock about his strange behavior lately.
5. Romantic dinner
Jim never got much of a chance the next day to ask Spock why he had been acting so different recently.
His day started off with him and Spock waking up late. He didn't exactly have a lot of time to talk to Spock while they were both rushing to get to their shifts on time.
When they did get to their shifts on time, Jim and a landing party had to beam down to a planet which they thought had no species living there. After being there for an hour or two, the were attacked by a group of people who looked like Huns.
When they were beamed back up to the ship, Jim and other members of the landing party spent quite a bit of time in sick bay. Jim suffered the most damage but it was nothing life threatening. Bones kept Jim in sick bay for the rest of his shift for him to get some rest. Even though Spock did come down to see Jim throughout the day and make sure he was still okay, there was no way Jim was going to talk to Spock about his behavior while in pain and Bones giving him hypos.
By the end of the day, after a lot of begging from Jim claiming he was okay, Bones checked him over one more time and released him from sick bay.
Jim's shift would've been over an hour ago, so he made his way back to his and Spock's quarters. He hoped Spock wasn't busy so maybe he could finally confront him.
He walked in and what he saw shocked him.
He saw Spock standing by a table with an amazing candlelit dinner on it. There was two plates with set up with the most delicious looking food. Jim couldn't tell exactly food there was from where he was standing but it smelled wonderful. There was even a candle in the middle of the table which Jim thought was very cliché but kind of sweet. But once Jim got past how sweet this all looked, he was confused as to why Spock was doing it.
"Jim, are you feeling alright now?" Spock asked.
Jim shifted his gaze to meet Spock's, "Yeah, I'm fine now. Spock, what is all this?" Jim gestured to the table.
"A dinner. For you, Jim."
Jim wasn't sure why Spock was doing this. It wasn't any special occasion for them and even if it was, Spock would never do this.
"A dinner for me?" Jim asked.
"Yes," Spock said, "I had a few ensigns help me prepare a meal for the both of us."
"Prepare? So none of this is replicated?"
"No. Now please sit." Spock sat down at his side of the table and Jim took the seat opposite.
They both started eating quietly until Jim broke the silence, "This is amazing, Spock."
"Thank you, Jim." Spock replied, "Though, I am not the only one you should be thanking. Plenty of others helped."
"I'll make sure to thank all of them later." Jim paused for a moment, "Wait, did you get Bones to keep me in sick bay all day so you could set this all up?"
Jim didn't even know what time Spock had gotten off shift earlier so he could have been there for hours setting it up.
Spock just looked down at his meal and blushed.
Jim smiled at the green tint on his face, "You did!"
"Though I did not know you would be attacked on the planet you beamed down to." Spock said quickly, "I was frightened to hear you were injured though thankful to know it was nothing too harmful. I then proceeded to ask Dr. McCoy to keep you away from our quarters for the day."
"Wait, so I was fine all day and I didn't actually need all those hypos?"
"Yes. I do apologize for that. I assume most of the hyposprays were harmless."
Jim laughed.
"Have I done something to humor you?" Spock asked, a confused expression on his face.
"No, it's just sweet." Jim answered, "What you did for me, I mean. It was very sweet." Jim's smile faded from his face a second later, "But I need to ask you something."
"What is it, T'hy'la?"
"Why are you doing this? Actually, not just this, but all of it. Why are you doing it?"
"I do not understand what you are referring to."
"I mean everything you've been doing lately. The hand holding, hugging, kissing my cheek, sleeping close to me at night. You never do any of that stuff, why are you doing it now?"
"Before I answer question, may I ask one of my own?"
"Go ahead."
Spock took a deep breath, "Jim, do you love me?"
"Do I love you?" Jim asked to make he heard right, "Of course I love you, Spock. We've been together for three years. Why would you even ask something like that?"
Spock looked down at his meal and remained silent.
"Spock, answer me." Jim said a bit more harshly.
Spock looked up but refused to look at Jim in the eye, "I thought you did not love me anymore. I thought you have been, as you would say, 'bored with me' recently. I have seen you talk and 'flirt' more often with other members of the crew. I have noticed you have been more distant from me lately. I thought you did not love me anymore." Jim opened his mouth to say something but Spock continued instead, "I thought you needed someone more like you so I decided I should embrace my human side more to be more human like you. That is why I have been choosing such actions. I did it because I love you, Jim, and I wanted you to love me. I do not what I would do if I were to lose you. You are the only person I have ever known to make me feel so much love and emotion."
Tears welled up in Jim's eyes. He couldn't believe he had been so blind as to what he was doing to make Spock feel like this. He hated himself for it. He didn't know to do or say. He just sat there and shook his head in disbelief. He couldn't believe Spock had even thought something like that.
"Spock," Jim managed to say. Jim stood up and walked around to Spock's side of the table. Spock watched as Jim grabbed his hands and lifted him to his feet. Jim carefully brought his hands up to each side of his lover's face.
"Look at me." Jim said. Spock brought his eyes to meet Jim's, "Spock, I want you to know that I love you. I always have and I always will. I know you're half human and half Vulcan but you can choose to be whichever one you want to be. I promise I will always love you no matter what because I love everything you do say. I'm sorry that I've made you feel like I don't love you anymore. I didn't even realize what I was doing. I promise I will never do anything like that again and I won't be so distant anymore. I'll be with you as much as I can." Jim paused for a moment, "It was so stupid what I was doing to you and if I ever do it again, I give you permission to hit me as hard as you possible can." Jim allowed a small smile on his face, "I'm sorry, Spock. I never want to lose you either."
Jim leaned in and kissed Spock on the lips as he brought his hand down and pressed their fingers together in a Vulcan kiss.
A minute later Jim broke the kiss, leaning his forehead against Spock's but keeping their fingers together.
"I love you." Jim said.
"And I love you, T'hy'la." Spock replied.
Spock meant it. And he knew Jim meant it too.
