Author notes: I've given up trying to write serious fan-fiction, it just does not work for me. This is for the Sweetest Irony February contest, Body Heat.
Disclaimer: I don't own Dragonball Z, obviously.
Gohan stopped rummaging through his locker and looked up, a look of con fusion on his face.
"I sense something," he said, Videl raising an eyebrow, "A presence I've not felt since my fan-fiction days."
"Fan-fiction days?" Videl asked, smirking.
"Don't ask."
Suddenly a tall and buxom blonde stood between Videl and Gohan.
"Hi," she said to Gohan, "My name's Asphyxia Excrucia Anoia, and I'm half-saiyajin, half-namekseijin and half-nekojin and I'm very skilled in martial arts, I know over two hundred instant kill attacks and…"
The strange girl was cut off by a gun shot. She collapsed to the floor, bleeding heavily from the back of her head and revealing a rather pissed off looking Videl, holding a hand gun.
"How can you be three halves?" Gohan wondered aloud.
"Alright," Videl yelled to the high school populace, "Who the bloody hell let a Mary-Sue in here?"
"I'm sorry Miss Videl, it was me," Yamcha, the school janitor said, bowing, "It will never happen again."
"You're damn right it won't happen again, you're fired," Videl said, "Clean out your closet and get lost."
"That doesn't make sense," Gohan said, "How can a student fire a staff member?"
"It's a parody Gohan, it's not supposed to make sense," Videl explained.
"Oh," Gohan said, "You know I can't help thinking we've forgotten something."
"The challenge," Videl said.
"Oh right," Gohan said, "Body Heat wasn't it?"
"That's right," Videl said, "It's rather chilly this morning isn't it?"
"Oh, here," Gohan said, placing an arm around Videl's shoulders, "Have some body heat."
"While I hate the fact that this makes me feel weak and vulnerable, thank you," Videl said as they walked down the hall. "Hey Gohan, want to skip history and make out in the janitor's closet? I'll let you get to fourth base."
"What's fourth base?" Gohan asked.
Author notes: You may, if you wish, consider this my forumnal suicide, but preferably not.
