"You hurt me..."
The accusation stung, because it was true and because it was this boy who was saying it to his face. His eyes weren't wide, there was no trace of anger in his voice, he wasn't flushed nor was he breathing in that ragged way that intoned the emotions supposedly carried by that simply complex statement. He didn't sound mad at all.
He sounded disappointed.
As if words were never likened to daggers or sharp blades, as if they never stung at all, as if the only way to describe what he'd done was to hold out a hand and feel it being let go. As if it wasn't a soul-searing pain, as if it were a different kind of pain altogether.
He was so, so very pale. His voice was silent, quiet, plaintive-- trembling like a child. His arms lay uselessly at his sides, his lips parted, his shoulders sagged under the weight of moments long passed.
And his heartbeat was so, so very slow.
There were no physical wounds to fuss about, no bruises nor scars to examine. No bad blood, no poison running through his veins. No anything.
The way he'd hurt him this time was too deep for that, much too deep.
He'd seen rage and adoration burn in those eyes, melancholy and annoyance, mirth and contentment, fear and darker things, but never this-- never this sadness that only broken hearts could make. Was this that last time everyone had warned him about? Did he have a second chance, to fix things?
But he broke him.
Not like Shizuka, who'd destroyed his past and his hopes and dreams. Not like Yuki, who'd let him fall and couldn't catch him. Not like the world, which had dealt him a lot that was too cruel for words.
He'd broken him.
As if he were a doll, a plaything, a toy.
And he told him that he loved him.
That he was a precious treasure.
That he was infinitely beloved.
That he was darling, dear and ever his.
And he broke him.
No tears fell, no words were spoken. He wanted to reach out and hold him again, wanted to promise to change, wanted to assure him that everything would work out. He wanted to mend his broken heart.
But the pieces were scattered, enumerable and uncountable amidst the darkness. This was not insanity, it was reality.
This time, he'd gone too far.
A tremulous smile worked its way unto his lips, and a moment passed before he spoke.
"Why?"
Oh, he loved him.
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fin
Author's Notes: Because yesterday, as we were driving to a workshop, Kazuya Arsashi and I somehow got into talking about Kaname, Zero and 'going too far'. We talked of the love they had, and I said something along the lines of 'anything, in excess, is unhealthy'. Kaname does love Zero, but with that love comes the hurt that is so often shown in the best of KanZe fiction. I started to think, what happens when he hurts him too much? What happens when he breaks him? And thus, this little ficlet was born. Short, and yet unclear. The only thing I'm sure of is that Kaname went a bit too far, and the fragile thing that is Zero's sensibility has finally crumbled.
Disclaimer: I don't own Vampire Knight. And for that, I am a bit thankful. Who knows what horrors the guys will go through if they were stuck with me?
Though posted a day late, I wish you all a Happy Valentine's Day. And hope that you remember that there is more than one Golden Rule.
