"Whoa, you look like a real miko."

"So I didn't look like one before?"

"At least you can tell I was a magician, even with my newer clothes."

"No no, if it weren't for your hair, I might accidentally make you out to be a flower to dye."

"Or a dinosaur?"

Standing outside of the Hakurei shrine, Reimu and Marisa looked up and down the other's attire. Marisa had long outgrown the purple robes, the lack of frills that were present on her newer clothes made the magician seem a bit less…bright to the eyes. That, and it must've been by some magic that Marisa's hat didn't slide off her head. Reimu herself questioned the somewhat (very) tight fit, wondering why her clothes were ever so small (her body had grown ever so large), as well as why her chest area felt much more comfortable in comparison (self-explanatory).

Reimu put a hand under her chin and scrunched her eyebrows.

"...Old."

"Wha-What makes you say that?!"

"Now that I think about it, wasn't your hair longer before?"

"I braided it!"

"So you got older."

"Who's fault is it that I'm dressed like this anyway?!"


Marisa swerved to the side to avoid the yin yang orb flying at her face. She raised her hand.

Love Sign [Master Spark]

Dream Sign [Boundless Barrier]

Marisa blinked, seeing the same confused face on Reimu far away.

"Ah-"


"Oh. Well," Marisa scratched her cheek, "that was a pretty big boom, huh? I never knew you came up with a new spell. And who'd have thought that we'd both run out of clothes at the same time anyway?""

Reimu sighed. It had been a mere hour after the fight, but it seemed like they'd be stuck with their current clothes for the remainder of the day. Or, that they'd begin the day with different clothes, since it was still morning. The sun was still in the sky, after all.

"You know, I was just about to wash my clothes before you barged in so rudely."

"You say that, but you were probably going to sweep the path instead, huh?"

"I have a sense of personal hygiene, I'll let you know. Unlike a certain person and the condition of their house."

"Is that why your sleeves don't cover your armpits anymore?"

"Is that also why you ride a broom?"

"I'll stop now."

Reimu turned toward her shrine.

"Aren't you going to intrude on my breakfast?"

"Love to, but I've got things to do."

Reimu stopped. She heard Marisa do the same.

"...Okay."

"Just so you know, I'm only meeting people."

"Uh-huh."

"So I'm not doing anything wrong."

"Sure."

"So don't say that I was."

"I'll tell that to the librarian in case she comes to ask."

"Or any other magician?"

"Her too."

"Thanks."

Reimu heard Marisa kicking off the ground and a WHOOSH before proceeding back to her shrine.

"Well, what to do now?"


With a soft thud of her boots, Marisa landed on the grass. She swept the front side of her old clothes as she stepped forward. Before her was a familiar, modern-looking house. Marisa knocked three times before calling.

"Alice?"

Knock knock knock again.

"A~li~ce?"

Knock knock knock knock knock!

Marisa waited five seconds, then held her breath for another five. Breathing out, she tip-toed over to a window and peeked in from several angles. The magician then took out her mini-hakkero and held it to the bottom of the window. With a familiar CLINK, Marisa pushed the window up and open. She carefully eased each leg inside. A girl had to be modest, after all.

"Yeah right." Marisa shuddered, immediately moving over to Alice's work desk.

It seemed that there were no security measures set against Marisa in the house. Of course, Marisa made it a necessity to track Alice's normal schedule before coming in to borrow (steal) things. If there were no dolls guarding the house (against Marisa) or enchantments to repel break-in attempts (by Marisa), then that could only mean that Alice went to the village to buy groceries (before Marisa came by).

Now Marisa was coming out of the door with a few books under her arm.

"What kind of thief walks out the front door with what they've stolen in plain sight?"

It was almost as if Alice had appeared in front of Marisa. And the second Marisa noti-

SHLINK!

Marisa fell on her butt, books spread about around her.

"Hey, Alice, wha-"

Marisa rolled out of the way just as another doll thrust its lance near where her throat would have been. The owner's eyes widened a bit.

"Marisa...?"

"Are you crazy, Alice?" Marisa readjusted her hat, which was tilted to one side. "That's a bit far for someone who's forgotten they've kept someone waiting."

Alice sighed, retracting her doll back behind her. "So I see you still intend on lying even though I attacked you like that." Alice would never admit that she was relieved it wasn't a total stranger, though.

"Why would I lie? I thought something had happened so I was going to go out and check."

"With my books in your hands?"

"They were under my arm ze."

Alice softly pinched her forehead. Marisa went over and began picking the books up.

"I was going to meet you anyways, what would it have mattered?"

"And if I wasn't going to be here?"

"Then I would be gone."

"With my books."

"YOUR books?"

Alice pinched her forehead again.

"So that would explain why you're dressed like that?"

"So you noticed?"

"Well," Alice went over to a book and picked it up, "seeing as I was about to cut you down and interrogate you, yes. When did you last wear those...bright clothes?"

"Bright?" Marisa lifted a few books for Alice, who had her dolls drop their shopping bags to take the books inside. "Purple is bright?"

"More than black. But you didn't answer the question."

"Do you really want to remember?"

Alice stopped for a bit, her dolls still flying the books back into her house.

"Actually, I don't."

"Thought so. Thinking you were such a great magician with just one grimoire and then crying after getting beat. Even I wouldn't want to remember something that embarrassing."

A vein throbbed in Alice's head. "Thanks for reminding me."

"Don't mention it."

Alice continued picking up books, Marisa leaning on the side of the house on the side.

"By the way." Alice said as-a-matter-of-factly.

"Hm?"

"If these were really your books, why are you letting me take them inside?"

Marisa and Alice watched the last doll fly inside, heaving a book in its arms. Marisa turned back to Alice.

"When did I ever say those were mine?"

Deep breath, Alice.

Deep breath.

"...Come on in."

"Thanks!"


Reimu placed the last of her clothes on the clothesline. After a short breakfast, she had taken her clothes and washed them one by one, constantly changing the water bin. It was amazing how the combination of sweat and dirt made for a stubborn cleaning enemy. A good hour of rinsing and scrunching finished with each of the clothes hung prim and proper on the clothesline. The sun, still clear in the sky, would make for a quick dry. Even though it would take the whole day for her clothes to be ready to wear.

"So, should I have some tea in the meanwhile?" Reimu bent her fingers between her hands. Surely, a cup of tea is a good break before sweeping the front path?

Reimu twisted herself left and right to inspect her arms, feeling the air under her sleeves. She had to admit it was a bit...restraining, not to feel that draft under her armpits. It was definitely warmer. Of course, with her current clothes, Reimu was also more white than she was red. Would that make her a white-red, then...? Perhaps she would also learn the ways of archery. Reimu tried to imagine herself screaming phrases like "This is your end, demon!" or "My arrow shall pierce through your evil!" or something like that.

Reimu snorted a huff of air. Probably not.

"Rei~mu~?"

The miko looked around. Seeing as she couldn't tell where the voice was coming from, she knew who had come.

"Rei~mu~?"

The voice was getting closer.

"Where did you go?" Yukari's upper body poked out from her boundary, right beside Reimu's shoulder. Reimu only turned her head halfway in Yukari's direction. The gap youkai popped up in surprise as she noticed Reimu. "Excuse me little miko, you haven't seen Reimu around, did you?"

"Hello, Yukari. What brings you here today?"

"I'm looking for a girl named Reimu Hakurei. Is she here?"

"Yes, yes, I'm making tea right now."

"You look more like a miko than you did before."

"So you mean I looked more like a miko in the past than I do now?"

"Why, whatever does that mean?"

Ignoring Yukari, Reimu made for the inside of her shrine, but two hands on her shoulders dragged her back.

"So what's the occasion?"

Reimu could feel Yukari grin as the gap youkai's chin pressed on Reimu's head.

"Oh, you know. Ran out of clothes."

"Shame you don't have a shikigami working for you."

"It's no wonder Ran pays me so many visits."

"What a bad shikigami. I'll have to reprimand her next time I get the chance."

"She compliments you."

"Never mind then."

Reimu felt Yukari's grip loosen and proceeded to walk into the shrine. Yukari seemed to drift after her, coming out of her portal to walk along with Reimu and her hands still placed on the miko's shoulders. It looked like a possession.

"But really, what an interesting sight." Yukari spoke while Reimu began preparing the tea. "I never knew how much white complemented your figure."

"Why don't you try more of it sometime? It suits Ran well enough."

"Mmm...But velvet is much more reserved for someone like me, don't you think?"

"A great show of status and wealth."

"A compliment from you? Thank you very much."

"Only to fuel your ego." Reimu poured and handed a small cup to Yukari.

Yukari retreated back into her boundary, the gap closing and disappearing. Another gap opened just outside, and Yukari emerged and sat, tea in her hands. Pouring another cup for herself, Reimu went outside with a full tray. Two extra cups were seated around the teapot and her filled cup.

"So does it bring back memories?" Yukari said before bringing the cup to her lips.

Reimu's hand stopped on her cup's handle. "What?"

"Those clothes."

"I hadn't even met you then, so how would I have memories of you?"

"It's not always about me, dear Reimu."

"I'm sure."

"Yes."

A sip of tea. Then two. Yukari gazed at the sky before speaking again.

"You've changed, though."

"We all do."

"But not like you have."

"…I'm the same."

"Contradicting yourself, are you?"

"I meant in your words."

"Which are true, surely."

Another sip. Reimu was looking down slighty, with somewhat narrowed eyes. It was almost as if she were drifting away, or drunk in thought. Then, her forehead scrunched.

"...I couldn't fly then."

"Oh?"

"I was basically a little girl."

"Really?"

"I couldn't use many spells."

"Is that so?"

"I had to use my gohei to attack with a yin-yang ball."

"Very interesting."

"How old are you?"

"I'm still quite young. Thank you for caring."

One more sip of tea, then another voice called from the stone steps.

"Rei~mu~? Rei~mu~?"

Yuyuko's figure floated up and toward where she could see Reimu and Yukari sitting at the shrine. Reimu poured tea into one of the extra cups on the tray, offering it to Yuyuko who drifted to the two.

"Excuse me, have you seen Reimu aro-?"

"I'm glad you noticed my situation." Reimu cut Yuyuko off, the ghost mistress hovering over to a spot next to Yukari.

Yuyuko peeked past her dear friend at Reimu.

"My, you look more like a miko now."

"Here, tea."

Yuyuko made a small "oh!" with her hand and mouth, then took her cup. Yukari chuckled.

"I've teased her enough already."

"My, is that why she's not red anymore? How meeean Yukari."

"It's also why I've served tea." Reimu took a sip. "My clothes are drying right now, so this is all I have to wear."

Yuyuko took a whiff of the tea, then took a long sip. The three simply looked at the scenery in front of them, the trees still and the surroundings calm. Then, Yuyuko turned to Reimu.

"So, do those clothes bring back memories?"

"I see. Did Yukari tell you?"

"Yukari and I are just friends."

"I'll take that as a yes."

Just one reason Reimu disliked having Yuyuko and Yukari over at the same time. However, Reimu did find it intriguing to listen to the two talk between each other, as they began now. The way they laughed, the way they argued, and even the solemn looks they gave each other at times...

"Yuyuko, I understand that Youmu has been in your service for a long time and you know her best, but I don't think you see what I'm saying."

"Of course I do Yukari. But can Ran and little Chen swing a sword as cutely as Youmu can?"

"What's a sword got to do with anything? If we're talking about how they move, Ran is really cute when she's caught napping-"

"Well, my Youmu is cute as well when she's curled up at the front steps-"

"But Yuyuko, you've never seen two animals cuddling each other have you?"

"My, but Youmu is already like an animal herself."

"In what way?!"

"You~mu, the friend-ly ghost. She's the friendliest ghost I know."

Reimu drank her tea.


"No no no, we have to put mercury here to make the solution stable."

"And I'm telling you, it's platonium ze!"

Alice and Marisa were hunched over a small clay pot, with an odd purple liquid gurgling and emitting a nose-stinging odor. For the past ten minutes, the two magicians had gone from a conversation about spellbinding to a potion that could melt through anything but certain cloths. And an hour before that, Alice had been at Marisa's neck about making sure her house remained untouched.

Knock knock!

"Yes?" Alice didn't bother to turn her head. One of her dolls floated off, checked through the peephole, and opened the door.

"So you forgot about me, did you?"

Alice and Marisa turned around. Patchouli trudged through the door out from under an umbrella held by Sakuya. The library magician coughed.

"Please pick me up when I touch the crystal, if Remi doesn't require your help."

"Understood, Lady Patchouli. Then, excuse me."

With a CRACK, Sakuya disappeared.

"Whoa," Marisa mused, "I didn't know you turned into a vampire."

Patchouli squinted at Marisa.

"Quite an odd costume."

"Don't I look like a cuddly dinosaur?"

"Hardly."

"Ba-"

"Yes, yes," Alice cut in, "you've already brought that up enough times around me. Honestly, I don't know how you ever get by with magic with a runaway mind like that."

"So does that mean you really DO know how I get by with magic? That's creepy ze."

"In any case," It was Patchouli's turn to interrupt, "we should solidify that substance before you poison all of us."

Alice and Marisa turned to where Patchouli was now pointing, then looked back at the library girl.

"We were actually thinking about how to make it work as a liquid." Alice waved off. "It's hardly poisonous as it is anyway."

Patchouli grumbled a bit. Marisa brought a stool for herself as the library magician took a seat. Alice wafted the solution on the table. Then, she reached for a tube on the table-

"You should know that mercury will create a disaster." Patchouli's eyes traced Alice's hand movements.

"Told ya."

"I know what I'm doing I'll have you know." Alice stopped for a moment, then continued reaching for the tube.

"Really?" Marisa crossed her arms and leaned on the table. "Is that why you're about to expose us to mercury without any precautions?"

Patchouli said nothing, but continued to watch Alice.

"It'll take a lot more than a minute of exposure to do any real harm to us." Alice opened the tube and began to pour. "Besides, we're all magically potent here-AAGH!"

"Ah…!"

"Guh…!"

Marisa raised her hands in front of her face just as a bright light shined on her eyes. Blinded, she also felt the splash of liquid on her arms and front, as well as splotches on her face. The liquid was warm and tingled on her skin in an almost ticklish way.

Reeling backward, Marisa stood up and tried to open her eyes. Whatever had happened, it seemed that the light had only shone for an instant. However, as her vision recovered from its blur, she saw that Alice had covered her arms over her body for some reason. Upon closer inspection, Marisa gasped.

"Wha…What happened to your clothes…?"

"I did warn you." Patchouli was already inspecting the remains of the substance. "Well, at least I can confirm the effects of such a combination."

"I don't get it! I did this before and it never did something like this!"

Alice, though trying to cover herself, was clearly disheveled. The lower half of her attire was missing, the tatters looking as if someone had torn off the other half. Her bow and shoes had noticeable holes in them, wherever it didn't look as though parts of them weren't bitten off. The effects of the solution still seemed to be working, though dying out. It was as if slow acting acid were drying off and eating away whatever it could before it disappeared. Alice shot a gaze at Marisa.

"And why are YOU just fine?!"

Marisa looked down at herself, expecting patchy holes in her clothes. Instead, she found that there were simply dark marks where the solution had landed on her. More so, it was drying off as she watched.

"Huh, so what do you know. There was an enchantment on them." Marisa pinched several parts of her attire.

Patchouli raised an eyebrow. "An enchantment? Since when did you deal with enchanting protective spells on clothing, let alone on yourself?"

"Hey, I practice those spells too!" Marisa looked offended. "I just don't practice them as often. Besides, why protect myself when I can be blasting other people? It's not like I can't dodge danmaku."

Deciding not to press on the last comment, Patchouli narrowed her eyes. "…Though it is peculiar. Normally enchantments are performed to protect one from supernatural cause or nullify effect. So why did it respond to physical interaction, much less simply reflect?"

"Uh, dunno?" Marisa scratched her head. "Isn't it just because these clothes are that awesome?"

Alice came back into the room redressed, the other two unaware that she had left in the first place. "So you're wearing clothes that you don't even remember enchanting? Doesn't that mean that you might be getting cursed by some other being as we speak?"

"That's impossible ze." Marisa titled her head to think for a bit. "These clothes were put in a very protective place."

"You mean on the floor under several grimoires and two other piles of clothes?" Alice gave Marisa a dull glare.

"Are you spying on me?"

"I've BEEN at your house, Marisa. It's not like it's hard to notice the state of someone's house if it looks like thieves had torn through it."

"But you've only been in the first room-"

"If I may interrupt," Patchouli's eyes were still narrowed, inspecting Marisa, "I'd like to rectify my earlier comment. It seems like not just one enchantment exists on those clothes. In fact, there are well over one-hundred different spells embedded and layered on one another. That's not to go into detail of the many counter spells that seem to be well fused or ordered to prevent disabling the effective enchantments. Did you really do this, Marisa?"

"Well, what if I said I di-"

Marisa stopped herself. She blinked as a certain thought passed through her mind. There was one person Marisa could think of that would and could be responsible for the enchantments. And when Marisa did, she stopped herself from completing her sentence.

"Marisa?"

"Ah…no." Marisa snapped out of her thoughts. "Forget what I said. Seems like I got this from somewhere amazing ze."

Patchouli raised an eyebrow. "And where would that be?"

Marisa's smile didn't fade. "Hehe, that's a secret. It's not something novices should be concerned about."

Alice and Patchouli gave Marisa a suspecting look, one that turned malicious.

Marisa returned the stares.

"Bring it on, ze."


"Oh? Reimu!"

Sweeping the front path, Reimu wiped her forehead and turned around to see Suika walking toward her. Reimu planted the broom on its head.

"There's food near the shrine. Yukari and Yuyuko are there, though."

"Oh no, not that." Suika bent herself over, inspecting Reimu. "I just thought there was something funny here, but turns out it was just you."

Reimu's eyebrows creased.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You tell me." Suika gave Reimu a what-do-you-mean look. "You're the one wearing odd clothes, aren't you?"

Rubbing the sides of her forehead with her thumb and forefinger, Reimu lamented herself for her still-drying clothes. She had left the other two youkai to their conversation, seeing as they carried on without Reimu. As such, Reimu cleaned the stone path.

"Well, things happened. But why would me wearing these clothes make you feel funny? Aren't you the one who usually gathers odd things?"

"Is that all you see me as?" Suika pouted, swinging her gourd around her arm. "Anyway like I was saying, it was your clothes that are giving away funny vibes. You'd think as the Hakurei shrine maiden even you'd notice the difference?"

"And as the Hakurei shrine maiden, I only notice incidents."

"So attracting youkai because of the clothes the Hakurei shrine maiden wears couldn't possibly cause an incident?"

"Incidents that would endanger humans."

"Attracting youkai around a human."

"Are you picking a fight?"

"You're the one saying the words."

Reimu didn't say anything more as Suika took a swig of her gourd-

"Gu…puwah-!"

"Hey!"

-and sake splashed as Suika spit. Reimu jumped back and slammed the broom on its head.

"What do you think-"

But before Reimu said anymore, she stopped.

"Sorry, sorry…huh?"

Reason being, they noticed the lack of stains on Reimu. Suika slightly leaned back and crossed her arms, eyebrow raised.

"So Reimu can be surprised?"

"No. Just forgot about a certain old man and his overprotectiveness."

"…"

"…"

"I know you're being honest with me Reimu, but it kinda worries me that you aren't even aware of what your own clothes are capable of."

Reimu glared. "…So you're picking a fight?"

"You're the one saying the words. But if we do danmaku and I blow off those clothes, you'll be just a red miko."

"…"


BOOM!

"…Oh my."

Yuyuko peeked around Yukari. Both took it upon themselves to make themselves an audience to the now escalating danmaku fight. Yukari turned to Yuyuko and smiled.

"Back to that first thing, we can both agree that the young ones are the best, right?"

"You don't really think that, do you Yukari?"

"You can't deny how adorable they can be though."

Yuyuko looked up and put a finger to her chin.

"…No, I suppose not."

They both chuckled between themselves.


Left, right, left, right.

The sun was setting, but one magician still had something to do at the Hakurei shrine. Though the miko who lived at that shrine had diligently cleaned her home all day, the front path was covered in small craters. The surrounding trees were noticeably missing branches and leaves.

Stepping over a crater, Marisa looked as if she were walking drunk as she went over to where Reimu was now sitting.

"…Yo."

Reimu took a sip of sake, offering another cup at her side to Marisa. The first thing the Miko noticed was the smoke sizzling on her clothes. Next was that although Marisa's face was covered in dirt and fatigue, her clothes had only specks of dirt here and there. The magician sat next to Reimu, crossing her legs while letting out a sigh. At the same time, Marisa noticed that Reimu was in the same state.

"…You look tired." Reimu broke the silence.

"There were these crazy magicians that attacked me out of nowhere ze."

"But you look okay?"

"Of course, it takes-…Of course."

Marisa seemed like she was going to say something, but stopped. She took a small drink.

"…And you? You look like an oni pounded on nothing but your face."

"It's dirt, not bruises."

"You don't look dirty, though?"

"Ah, that's because-…yeah."

Sipping at the same time.

"You know," Marisa finished sipping after Reimu, "I think I'm gonna give thanks."

Followed by another long sip.

Reimu's eyes stared into the distance. "That's funny. I was too."

"So does that mean you're treating me to turkey?"

Sip…

"For something a long time ago."

"You mean when we were young?"

"So you DO admit you were old."

"I'd say you were a brat."

"Or someone who taught arrogant apprentices a thing or two."

Sip…

"I was plenty experienced ze."

"So you admit you're old?"

"You do too?"

"I had a teacher."

"So did I."

"You call an animal a teacher?"

Silence. Sip.

"At least they cared about me."

"So did mine."

"But you didn't feel like a boss?"

"That's hierarchical love and possible disclaimer ze." Marisa followed without pause.

Sip…Pause. Sip…

"So why am I telling you this?"

"You're telling me now before it happens."

"But you know who I am."

"Aren't you a miko?"

One last drink. Then, Reimu sighed.

"My clothes are done."

Marisa flipped her empty cup in her hand.

"Mine are too."

Reimu took hold of the gohei next to her.

"Should we finish what we started?"

"There's nothing between us, ze."


At the end of the battle, neither miko nor magician could do damage to the other's clothes. However, before the two went to bed, two cups of sake were placed next to a certain lake. And although complaints were made as to the location of these items, the very next day those items still disappeared.

Author's note: Learning how to do quick jabs. But, I think using non-western references can be lost in translation, and that's why I used mostly western ones. On a different, additional note, I want Yohane to do more works with Yuyuko in them. That's just a personal preference. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this attempt at a partly gag work.