A/N: Written in 2007. I think of this as part of the "Go the Distance" arc which started with "For Them" and was my attempt to eradicate the 'epilogue of doom'. Originally posted on livejournal.


Finding Home

Standing on the platform surrounded by his wife and children, best friend standing sentry at his side, he sees him.

The train lets out a loud, shrill whistle. Grey eyes lift to meet his. And with a lurch of his heart, he's thrown back twenty years.


Ron was alone by the graveside now. The others had left one by one. He felt bone weary and sick. Even knowing that this was the last, finally the last of the unrelenting list, wasn't enough to relieve his grief.

He thought bitterly of the sick mockery of a calendar hung on the kitchen wall at home. The calendar on which his mother had carefully written with shaking hands the date and time of each "event". He'd hated her at that moment. Hated her with a deep furious anger; had wanted, needed to pull the quill from her hand and stab it into the cruel paper, tearing away the words that were slowly killing him.

And then he'd noticed her hands. The hands that had always seemed so strong, so capable. There to wipe away the blood and tears when he'd fallen down as a child. There to hold him when he'd woken from nightmares of teddy bears and spiders. Always strong, always capable. Suddenly now fragile, skin worn thin, fingers struggling to keep hold as she slowly and methodically wrote out the next time when she'd have to stand watch as they lowered yet another body into the ground; her neat, small handwriting filling the box with the time and place when she'd have to watch them lower her son.

He'd left then. Not able to trust himself, he'd fled. Ran to the one place, the one person that could help him now.

And he had known, had been there waiting, knowing that Ron needed him.

There'd been no words. It had been a long time since they needed words. Longer than anyone would ever guess or believe.

Afterwards they'd lain in each other's arms and he'd cried at last.

Ron looked up at the darkening sky now and wondered what Fred would have made of it, while all the time knowing that he'd never know. They'd left no ghosts, no one would tell his secrets.

Arms circled him and for the first time in too many days Ron felt warm.

"If it had been you I …"

Turning, he stopped the words unable to hear them, unable to admit his own shame…better Fred than


"Ron, Ron!"

He ignored the voice of his friend. Ignored them all. There was something he had to do, something he should have done a long time ago.

Twenty years ago he'd taken a wrong turn and lost himself.

Now, breathless in front of Draco Malfoy, he'd finally found the way back. And pulling Malfoy close, he smiled into laughing grey eyes, and came home.