Chapter 1: AT THE PROFESSOR'S LAB

One day, a young man named Sean is starting a Pokémon journey in the Alola region. He goes to see Professor Kukui and get a Rowlet, Litten, or Popplio.

Sean: Gimme a damn Rowlet or I'm gonna slap the fuck outta you.

Kukui: I'm sorry, but there ain't Rowlets left for your ugly ass. But we do have a couple of Rockruffs.

Sean: Well, gimme a damn Rockruff!

Kukui: Be patient, you greedy fuck! Imma get you a damn Rockruff!

Kukui grabs some Pokéballs (that are bigger than his. If you're saying this doesn't matter, you're wrong af. Kukui's wife only married him for his money. It's surprising he even has a wife. Going up to them without a shirt looks like fuckin Herbert the Pervert) from a desk. He opens them and three little Rockruffs come out to play. Two of the Rockruffs are trying to lick the other Rockruff. The Rockruff getting licked looked like a female.

Sean: Dafuq...are they having an orgasm?

Kukui: No, you vanilla ice cream cone! They're just having fun!

One male Rockruff started humping the female Rockruff. The other male jumped off the table and started eating at the bowl of Tostitos cookies. (See? Scientifically proven. Dogs eat anything.)

Sean: "Having fun?" Makes sense.

Kukui: Want a Rockruff? All three are available.

Sean: Umm...they all look the exact same.

As if on cue, all the Rockruffs barked at the exact same time. At 12:02:23 PM. It was at 12:02:27 PM when a male Rockruff farted.

Sean: Nasty worthless fuck!

Kukui: How 'bout the female one? She's been pregnant for 8 and a half months, and I don't need no more Rockruffs, bitch.

Sean: How do you know?

Kukui: I hear odd noises at night.

Sean: I don't wanna take care of fuckin puppies! Grandpa can do it! Dayum.

In case u didn't know, Grandpa is a man with tiny fuckin testicles named Kukui.

Kukui: Fuck you, snowball.

Sean: Fuck you too, coconut.

In the end, Sean takes the female Rockruff.

Sean: Hmmm… Rockruff, what should I name you?

Female Rockruff: Ruff?

Sean: I know! How 'bout Pregnancy? You are pregnant, after all.

Rockruff shook its head in disagreement.

Sean: Ok… how 'bout Twilight? It sounds good.

This time, the Rockruff gave a nod.

Sean: OK, Twilight it is!

Twilight: Rock! Ruff!

Sean gave Twilight a hug. Twilight licked Sean's face. Lol.

Sean: Let's go, Twilight!

Twilight: Ruff!