Disclaimer: Kingdom Hearts is not owned by me nor is any song that I use in this fan fiction. Thank you.

Author's Note: Another new story. Actually, I have been reading some yaoi manga and came across one about a novelist and a fan. Hehehehe. It gave me inspiration to write a new piece. I'm so excited and I hope you enjoy it as much as I will.

Don't forget to review!

Warnings: Mild language, impure thoughts, sexual situations.

Summary: Accidentally finding a homosexual erotica novel, Riku Yamada finds himself unexpectedly aroused. When his sister Kairi says she's friends with the author, Riku is forced to meet him. But what kind of trouble will that lead to?

P.S. - Hehehehe. I'm giggling every word I type. God, I'm going to enjoy this fan fiction. Expect many humorous scenes.

WILL BE YAOI IN FUTURE! TURN BACK NOW IF YOU DON'T LIKE BOY/BOY LOVE! THANK YOU!

Now on to the chapter! Don't forget to REVIEW! REVIEW! REVIEW!

(Note: This was not beta-ed. Sorry if there are major mistakes.)

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Acquired Taste: Chapter One 'Expect the Unexpected'

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Eyes…so many eyes just staring at him with blank expressions. Sure, they were smiling…but just because he was so damn sexy gave them no right to yearn for his lustful body.

Yeah, you damn dolls! Just because you're his damn sister's doesn't mean you're innocent! Ha! He had them all figured out.

Speaking of that she-devil, where was she?

"RI-KU!" The sound of said she-devil's voice caused Riku to jump from his sister's bed, where he unceremoniously landed on his face with a loud thud. Painful throbbing reverberated in his ears by the time Kairi entered the room, giggling.

"What are you doing on my floor, silly?"

And this was how weekly trips to his sister's house usually worked. Riku was always in some embarrassing situation while his sister laughed it off from the side. It just wasn't fair…

"Shut up Kairi…" A muffled reply, but the girl heard it nonetheless and trying to keep one shred of pride left within him, the silver-haired boy sluggishly raised himself from the floor. A small sigh escaped his lips.

When his green eyes centered on his sister, the redhead simply grinned and skipped over to her brother, patting him on the head playful. "Is my Ri-Ri okay?" Giggle. "I don't want you to hurt that beautiful face of yours!"

Her older brother growled as he crossed his arms. "Stop making fun of me…"

She knew that he treasured his looks more than anything else. He had to be the biggest Narcissist in the world, but that wasn't important at the moment. Being that she was the little sister, she had the right to torture her brother thoroughly. And she couldn't just give up now that she was getting into it!

"So Ku-Poo…" Twitch. God he hated that nickname. "How's Sora-kins?"

The older boy plopped onto the girl's bed and lazily laid back, cushioning his head with his hands. His eyes seemed to become distant for a moment before finally coming back to reality. "Heh, he's fine."

Kairi bit her lip before gently plopping down next to her brother. "Everything alright with you two?"

Riku shrugged his shoulders and turned onto his side, back facing her. "I don't want to talk about it."

Even though Kairi despised getting those kinds of answers from people, she decided it wasn't the time to pick a fight with her brother, being that it was a touchy subject. Anyways, there would be tons of times to do that later. "Well, I'm hungry! What do you want to eat?"

However depressed he was, Riku eagerly bounced back as the thought of food crossed his mind. "Pizza?" A smirk twitched onto his lips as Kairi let out a disgusted huff. This was going to be pay back. "And make it extra large with everything on it…"

"Gross Ri-Ri…I know you have a weird taste for food, but I think you need to go get your appetite checked!" A soft hand made their way through silver locks and tugged harshly, issuing a sharp yelp from her older brother. "Next time get something I like too, you goof!"

Glaring, Riku rubbed his aching scalp, eyes misty from the pain. "Damn it, be more careful with the hair! I take a lot of time with it every morning, ya know?"

Rising from the bed, Kairi let out a small chuckle as she exited the room. "Whatever, you lazy bum!" And with that said, she closed the door with a soft click.

Ahh…complete silence. Man was that nice for a change…

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.

Okay, only three seconds went by and he was officially bored.

Tapping a finger on his chin in thought, the boy slowly glanced over the contents of the room, attempting to find something that he could entertain himself with.

Make up…no he didn't feel like coloring the walls with lipstick today.

Cds…hmmm…nah Kairi only listened to lovey-dovey groups like Utada Hikaru and Yuna. He wasn't into girly music…

Dolls…that were still staring at his gorgeous body…Hehehehe…keep staring ladies…you ain't getting none of this…

Books…hmmm…well…it was worth a shot…

So, sliding off the bed, Riku paced over to the bookshelf, not knowing what to expect in the slightest. However, when he got there…

What. The. Hell.

What is this! When has she gotten so book smart? 'Don't Know Much About History'…'What Life Should Really Mean'…'How To Deal with Narcissist Men'…What the hell is that one about? She couldn't possibly mean me! Geez…stupid girl…

This was getting nowhere…they were all such boring books…

However, despite every other book…there was a whole row in particular that caught his eye.

'To Love Your Student'…'Desire in an Elevator'…what the hell…girly books?

Curious, Riku took another romance novel, 'Taking Pleasure' and flipped to the middle of the book. What he read…was something he never expected his sister to own in her library ever, much less know about it.

Taking Pleasure Page 102

Never before had the other aroused him so. Sure, they had plenty of moments where small touches sedated the other's appetite, but once Squall pinned Cloud against the wall and felt that irregular pulse beating beneath his fingertips, all was literally lost.

"Squall…" A seductive moan. Squall enjoyed making these noises come out of his beloved's tempting lips. "Don't…ahh…"

"Shhhh…" Squall let himself drown in his lust, eyes glazing over as he leaned in to kiss his sweet temptation. "Don't speak. You'll ruin the moment…"

"Nhh…" Grinding against the smaller blonde, Squall captured his male partner's lips into a passionate kiss, leading both into a pool of lustful thoughts, which turned into quite a fanciful picture.

A hand gingerly slithered into Cloud's pants, while the brunet distracted the other with his zealous kisses. There was no turning back now and Cloud seemed more than willing to go each passing second.

"Fuck me Squall…please…" Another loud moan this time. Squall was aroused more than ever.

"Oh I'll fuck you…all night long."

The husky tone in the brunet's voice sent Cloud into a fit of shivers. "Ahh…wait…" He gasped as he felt a finger probing his entrance. "Squall…wait-"

The brunet grinned, leaning into his lover's ear. "Are you telling me you want to quit already?" Tugging the other's pants down, the brunet made a point to nibble on his lover's ear. "Don't disappoint me now…"

All of a sudden-

Lowering the book from his gaze, Riku's mouth gaped in astonishment.

What. The. Hell.

He read the last paragraph again before noticing his throat suddenly was dry and the air was so uncomfortably hot.

He read over a few more lines…

Sucking on soft lips, Squall pushed his lover down onto the bed, twisting a nipple just to hear Cloud moan his name. "Squall…"

With his fingers soaked with the sticky substance, the brunet prepared Cloud for what would be-

…before he closed the book with a disgusted huff. Then he opened it back up for one more peek…

"Can I put it in?" The brunet breathed huskily into the other's ear, earning a strained moan.

"Idiot…don't make me say it." Feeling the fingers moving around inside him, Cloud let out a sharp gasp as Squall nipped a nipple, harshly.

"Cloud…say it. Tell only me. Let me be the only one to hear it…"

A reluctant moan later, Cloud was found crumbling under the pleasure. "Put it in…"

God damn it, why couldn't he just put this book down? Was it some kind of black magic? WHAT THE HELL WAS WRONG WITH HIM?

Better yet…what the hell was wrong with this book!

Closing it, Riku stuck out his tongue in disgust before sending the inanimate object a stern glare.

"Wow…and I thought I could be perverted! Who the hell wrote this anyway?" Just out of curiosity, the silver-haired boy glanced to the back cover and on the bottom written in big black letters, it read:

Written By: Leon Leonhart

Leon? A MALE WROTE THIS! Whoa, talk about your major perverts in the world of today. And people actually buy this stuff?

"Riku! Pizza will be here in twenty minutes and-what are you doing?" Catching his brother going through her stuff, Kairi shot him a stern look before gracefully striding over and plucking the book out of his hands to take a look at what he was reading. She grinned and snickered. "Riku, Riku, Riku…I never knew you liked Erotic Novels."

Riku's eyes widened before waving the matter off. "You don't know what you're talking about…"

Scooting closer to her brother, Kairi made a point to elbow him in the bicep, a knowing glint in her bright blue eyes. "Riku…you liked it, didn't you?"

Being the stubborn male, the older boy crossed his arms and turned away from his sister. "Shut up, that book is for perverts. No wonder why you have it!" He cracked a grin before facing his sister with an evil gleam in his green pools. "Seriously, a gay erotic novel? What is with that?"

Kairi smirked, returning the book to its rightful place. "It's none of your business. You should just admit you like it!" Wagging a finger at him for prying into her personal business, the redhead calmly ruffled Riku's hair and skipped to her bed before her brother grabbed her for a noogie.

Fuming, Riku glared darkly at his sister, but she ignored him as she calmly stared up at the ceiling, watching the fan twirl in a rhythmic motion.

Swish. Twirl. Swish. Twirl. Swish…

"If you like the book so much, I could introduce you to the author." A disgusted huff got her smirking. "Leon can be quite the character, but he's really nice once you break the ice."

Riku reluctantly pulled over his baby sister's computer chair and plopped down, letting out a tired sigh. "Whatever. It's not like I wanna see the guy. He sounds like a pervert."

Kairi smiled, eyes focused on a certain fan blade, one that was chipped on the end, spinning, spinning, spinning. "That's what most people think, but he really is a sweet guy." She sighed, her eyes becoming distant. This made Riku wonder.

"What are you thinking about Kai?" He leaned back into the chair, face turned to the side to look out the window. It was dark now and the summer heat had cooled down. Somehow, everything seemed peaceful here at Destiny Islands. Granted, summer usually was the most busy time of year with all the tourist stumbling around the place, but it was pretty okay.

"Riku…I can't help that you don't like my decision." The smaller boy sighed, pinning the said boy with a misty-eyed stare. Riku was getting lost in his eyes again. "I know you never liked Cloud, but-"

"Shut up! I never said that!"

Ah, the memories of this morning. Living with your best friend you just happened to have an unrequited love for was something that most people didn't want to deal with. However, Sora was just as stubborn as he was and there was nothing that was going to get in the way of whatever he wanted, desired.

This new desire being none other than a man five years Sora's senior. Cloud Strife.

"I thought you would understand…you're my best friend."

"Sora…I-I need to be alone."

There was too much in life that Riku needed to worry about. He was in his second year of college studying to be a Literature teacher, there was Riku's part time job at a local restaurant that always took up his time, Kairi was finally living alone now that she turned eighteen, so he had to make sure she was fairing well, and Riku, being nineteen, and with no time to spare didn't need the extra stress.

He just didn't need it.

"Ri-Ri…you seem sad. Wanna tell me what happened now?"

"No."

"Come on!" Sitting up, Kairi smirked, crossing her arms to her chest. "It's not like I know you're in love with Sora! The whole world knows, ya know?"

Riku's gaze hardened. Everyone besides Sora…

"But that shouldn't matter Ku-Poo! Honestly, you can find someone just as good!"

Suddenly, an idea struck her like a hammer over the head.

"I can set up a blind date for you!"

Riku's face contorted into an expression of fear. "NO!" When Kairi continued to plead, he vigorously shook his head, as if trying to dispel a bad memory. "Last time you did that, I nearly broke my ribs and my arm from just trying to defend myself! You have perverted friends!"

Kairi looked up in thought, as if she forgot the incident her brother was talking about. "Oh yeah! I forgot to tell you Zell can get pretty rough when he's drunk…" Riku crossed his arms indignantly. "Hey now! I know the perfect guy! He's tall, handsome, and has a deep voice. He's great! Not to mention…he's REALLY rich!" As if that would reel him in, Kairi winked in her brother's direction, but was ultimately disregarded.

Riku wasn't going to consider anyone that his sister would pick out for him. "I think I'll pass." Before she could continue to nag him, he held up his hand, signaling for her to stop. "And don't even think of finding someone for me…I don't need your help."

She shrugged, sighing as her brother rejected yet again. "Okay…I promise not to find you someone."

However, what Riku didn't see was Kairi's fingers crossed behind her back.

Was he in for a surprise.

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The next day Riku was so engrossed in one of his school books that when the telephone begun to ring, he jump, startled, and anxiously set the book down, a look of confusion gracing his features. His eyes glanced over to the clock on the desk. It read: 4:50 p.m.

Goddamn it…everyone knows this is my study time…fucking hell…who could it be?

Riku picked up the phone and sighed, greeting the caller with little enthusiasm. "Who the hell is this?"

The person on the other end huffed cutely before answering. Although Riku knew who it was just by the huff. Sisters…who could live with them?

"Riku, you meanie!" There was another huff before his sister's tone of voice abruptly became excited. "I talked to him!"

There was another huff before his sister's tone of voice abruptly became excited.

A silver eyebrow rose. "Talked to who Kai?" Trailing back to his desk, Riku situated himself on his computer chair before lazily opening his book again to lose himself in its contents. Whatever Kairi was excited about…well…let's just say when his sister was excited, something was definitely being planned.

'Children are like little flowers. Only when you fill their little minds with wisdom, do they bloom. They become full of life and knowledge. This…is what a teacher should know.'

Fucking weirdoes…who the hell thinks kids are flowers? More like little devils and-

"Ku-Poo! Are you even listening to me? Are you reading one of your school books and ignoring me again!"

Busted…

Trying to act cool, Riku chuckled, smoothly. "Come on Kai. I always listen to you. You said you talked to someone. I didn't quite catch who though…"

"Hehehehe. That's okay! You'll meet him around 5:45. I scheduled an early dinner for the two of you. Just to show my appreciation for you, my wonderful brother."

Right…appreciation his ass. She was getting him back for calling her a pervert -which she still was there's no mistake- and she just couldn't admit it herself.

Speaking of pervert…I wonder what kind of guy she has for me this time…man…this is going to suck. Hopefully, the guy wont rape me or even worse…rub his face in my hair…

To Riku…both were equally appalling. Who would want snot in their hair anyway?

"5:45? Who says I'm coming?" There was a giggling on the other line. Riku growled. "Come on Kairi, this isn't funny. You don't need to interfere with my love life. People do that enough already…" A depressed sigh escaped before he could control it. Unfortunately, his sister heard everything."MY POOR BROTHER! YOU ARE LOVESICK! GOOD! THEN HE'LL DEFINITELY TREAT YOU RIGHT! Hehehehe. I mean, he just suffered from a break up too, ya know? Anyway, I'll pick you up around five, kay?" Kairi heard her brother's indignant growl, causing her to snigger. "Don't give me that! I just want to make sure you're going that's all! Anyway, see you then!"

Out of pure habit, Riku's upper lip began to twitch as he grit his teeth rather roughly. This wasn't happening…couldn't be happening…not happening…

But pinching himself repeatedly wasn't getting him out of this reality.

Ouch. Ouch. Ouch. OUCH!

WHY WASN'T THE PINCHING WORKING!

"Damnation to that woman…bitch…" Okay, don't get the wrong idea of our favorite Narcissist. Kairi had always been the demanding type -probably dominant with her fuck buddy too…eww…- and despite him being the older brother…girls had persuasive ways. Whether they were born with it or not…it was…scary.

Seriously, if your nine year old sister came into the room with a sharp steak knife and threatened to castrate you just because you smashed her favorite doll's face against a sharp edge of the table -which shouldn't have been a big deal, since it was staring at him with those blank beady eyes…uhh…gross- wouldn't you be a little scared of her too?

Yeah, exactly…and now instead of a steak knife…it was a wooden…splintery spoon.

Oh god, the horror. She even had it dangling above her stove just in case she had to threaten him some more.

Girls were sneaky little bitches…

So even though he didn't want to go on this blind date, Riku had no choice, unless, of course, he wanted to have a one-on-one duel with Mr. Splinter…damnation to that spoon too. DAMNATION!

Gah, he had no time to worry about an old spoon anyway. He had to get ready to meet this mystery guy. Heh, damn it. He was probably some hot guy with REALLY bad habits.

His mind wandered to every blind date Kairi had arranged for him…

His first one was a guy named Ansem. God, was that guy creepy. He was always talking about the darkness as if it were his master and saying Riku understood nothing. 'One who knows nothing can understand nothing'. He shuddered just thinking about that guy. He was really possessive too, always trying to control him -especially when they were having sex…but was that really appropriate?- so that should have clued Riku in that Kairi had a bad taste in men.

No…he had to date two more…

After Asshole Ansem was out of the picture along came blind date number two, Axel. Whoo was that guy one weird pick. After every other sentence he would say, 'Got it memorized?' Which pissed Riku off since he usually forgot about many things and without constant reminder, it would be long gone out of his brain -however whether or not the redheaded dickhead knew that was a different story-so it always pissed him off.

To make matters worse, his libido was bigger than an African Elephant. Okay, okay. Maybe he was exaggerating a little…it was more like…how to put this…small package, but packed with stamina. Heh, he had to give it to himself…that was a pretty good joke. Did he just make a funny?

Anyway, if that wasn't enough, date number three had to be the worst, Zell. Sure, he was cute on the outside and he had a great personality, but once you got him wasted…that was almost the end of the road for poor ol' Riku. There they were, sitting at a nice little bar across from the restaurant Riku worked at when unexpectedly, Zell was beating the crap out of him.

Shudder. He cringed just reminding himself of it.

Well anyway…let's step out of Riku's World for a moment and into reality once again.

Glancing over to the clock once more, the silver-haired male sighed in frustrated. It was already 5:10. Why did he always go off into la-la land when he had important things to do…like prepare himself for someone worse than Zell.

Seriously, Kairi's perverted mind continued to get worse each rejected man Riku tossed out-mostly which was for the better…and for his health- so she took it upon herself to make sure he had a love life that was by her own standards…even though her standards sucked dick.

He rushed up to his room, off to ready himself for another horrific night.

At least, he wouldn't have to deal with Mr. Splinter…

Shudder.

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Grinning insanely wide, Kairi let out a triumphant squeal as she danced around the room. "I did it! I did it! I'm the best!" Pelvic thrust and then another. "Whose yo daddy! WHOSE YO DADDY, BIH!" Shaky Shaky of the butt and another pelvic thrust before another idea formulated in her pretty little head.

She wouldn't be able to do this alone. Well, okay. She was more than capable to accomplish her quest to find her big brother his perfect man, but having a best friend help was even better.

"Damn, I am a genius!" Dialing the memorized number, Kairi only had to wait for one ring as the hyperactive voice quickly answered her with a chirpy greeting. "Hello-Hello! This is Ku-Ku at your service!"

"Hey Rikku! I was wondering if you wanted to have some fun tonight."

The reply was a definite yes. "When and where, my darling? You just pick a place!"

Kairi giggled into the receiver, the blonde's fake accents always amused her. " Ku-Ku! Let me explain to you what the plan is first!"

"Yeah, yeah! Hurry it up Kai. I'm ready for some action! I've been itching to do something wild, something dangerous, or something random could work too. I mean after you drink ten Frappichinos and listen to Gwen Stefani all night long you get to the point where you have to, well for one thing pee, but then you get the feeling -"

Kairi smiled. Her friend was such a chatterbox and once the redhead enlightened the other girl on the situation, Rikku was more than willing to lend a hand.

"OOO! I know the perfect outfit to wear! I'll meet you at the restaurant at 6:00 so it wont seem so suspicious, alrighty? Hehehehehe. I cant WAIT! I'm totally pumped!"

That's exactly the kind of enthusiasm the redhead needed to successfully complete 'Operation Get-Riku-A-Boyfriend-Quick'. Honestly, she really was oh so smart….

"I'll see you then! Call me before you get there, so I know."

"Okie Dokie, Kai! See ya then!"

Hmmm…the saying, 'Girls just wanna have fun' comes to mind when compared to her devious plans. Hehehehe, Riku wouldn't know what hit him.

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5:30. It was five fucking thirty and she still wasn't there yet.

Smoothing out the front of his black sweater, Riku decided to go with a casual, yet classy touch. A black sweater hugged his lean, but slightly muscular body rather nicely and the yummy leather pants encompassed his hips in a seductive manner. Okay…so maybe Riku wasn't going for 'classy' per se…maybe more of a, how do you say, 'I'm-sexy-but-if-you-touch-me-you're-dead' kind of look.

Maybe that was why his dates always tried to get in his pants…

Heh, that's right. Riku was always such a sexy bastard. Oh yeah, you can even ask his sister's dolls! All they do is stare at him with such intense gazes that the boy just can't help but strut his stuff. Come one, it was Riku Yamada. Sexy was his middle name!

Knock. Knock. Knock.

That had to be Kairi now. That conniving little bitch. Just wait until this was over…he knew all her weaknesses…ALL OF THEM!

Ah, but wasn't that a double-edged sword…she knew all of his too. Damn her…

"Ku-Poo! Let's go before you're late!" Another rapping at the door. "He doesn't like when people are late! He's can get really pissy when it comes to that."

Riku's face fell. Great…already the guy has a serious flaw.

If you didn't know already, Riku was a lazy bastard…so lazy in fact that he usually was late to everything, except his school courses, of course. He didn't want to screw up his life by failing his college courses. That was important. School and his job were the two most important things in his life, besides Kairi, his family, and Sora.

Sora…

Nope! No dwelling on the past, it was time to get this night over with as soon as possible!

Being the kind older brother that Riku had always been to his baby sister, he let her stand outside for a few more moments until the sound of her constant knocking and her irritated screams upset the neighbors around him.

I can hear Ms. Old-and-Stinky now…she's probably gonna come out of the house, glare at Kairi until it burns a hole into her pretty little forehead and then she's going to get her cat and sick him on her…

Sweet…do I hear revenge calling?

The knocking only got more frantic with each passing second. "RIKU! THERE'S A SCARY WOMAN STARING AT ME! AND SHE'S GOT A SCARY CAT WITH HER TOO! LET. ME. IN!"

Ah, the joys of being a big brother.

Brushing his hair back and making sure he took his time to look presentable, the silver-haired male finally opened the door and took a step back before his sister practically scampered into the hallway. Her whimpers were music to his ears.

"So you met Ms. Old-and-Stinky, yes?" Kairi picked herself off the floor and crossed her arms to her chest in a HUGE pout. "And Snuffulkins has an even worse temper than his owner…"

Sticking her tongue out playfully, Kairi grabbed a hold of her brother's arm and attempted to lead him out the door. "Alright, no more time for games! We gotta go."

Riku stood stock-still. He really didn't want to go…

As if he was a two year old ago, he gave Kairi the puppy dog eyes, whining as he pulled away from her. "Do I have to go?"

Kairi's eyes darkened. "Yes. You. Do." With each word accentuated, Riku's brow delicately rose. She huffed in annoyance. "If you don't I'll just make sure to have my ultimate revenge."

Riku scoffed, a visible smirk on his lips. "What in the world do you possibly have that can hurt me?"

He wasn't expecting an insane cackle to erupt from his innocent little sister.

Her wicked grin was devious. "Christmas Eve, two years ago. I still have that picture from when you-"

OH GOD! NO!

Riku covered her mouth before she could utter those horrible words. "No…okay I get it! I get it! Just don't use it!"

She smiled warmly, perking up within the instant Riku complied to her wishes. "Awww! And I was going to put Ku-Poo's picture on the front page of the newspaper!" Another insane giggle. "Could you see that? In other news Riku Yamada dies from embarrassment after his sister, who works as a journalist-"

"I get it! I get it!" Pushing her towards the door, Riku locked the door behind him as they made their way towards Kairi's black Bug. "Damn, I forgot you have a girly car…"

Kicking a leg up behind her and clasping her hands together in front, she grinned. "I love my itty bitty Bug! Hehehehe! It's so adorable!"

Riku's face fell for the second time that night. "Why must I have a weird ass sister?" Running a hand through his perfect silver locks, he took it upon himself to open the door on his own and cram his tall body into the small car.

He hated cramp places…

Once Kairi was situated, she started the car and turned on the radio. Riku gazed out the window with a bored expression, missing the evil gleam in his sister's eyes.

He's a cold-hearted snake

Look into his eyes

Oh oh oh

He's been tellin' lies

He's a lover boy at play

He don't play by the rules

Oh oh oh

Girl don't play the fool--no

OH GOD IT WAS PAULA ABDUL!

"SHUT THIS SHIT OFF!"

Kairi just smiled sweetly. "Christmas Eve picture!"

Riku slouched in his chair, crossing his arms in a pout. "Damn it…"

This was going to be a long ride…

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Arriving at the restaurant in record time, the siblings proceeded to get out of the car, but unexpectedly Riku stayed in his seat for a moment more, formulating a plan to get out of this dinner date.

What do I have that can be used against her? Damn her! I thought I burned all those copies of that picture…hmmm…I know! If I act like an arrogant dickhead then the guy will only want to leave, so then the dinner date will be over and I will never have to put up with another sorry excuse for a date again!

Was he a genius or what?

"Come on, Ku-Poo! You have two minutes and if you don't make it, he'll give you a death glare all night long."

Frowning, Riku stepped out of the chair and shook his head. This guy had to be a stick in the mud if he's so anal about people being there on time. Man, this was going to suck so badly.

The restaurant his sister picked was one of the nicest on the island. Actually, only richer citizens or tourists visited this place just because it was that expensive. However, from time to time when you decide to eat there, you can meet a celebrity or too -even though they can get pretty pissed off when you interrupt their meal, Riku should know…heh…oh wait…he did that for Kairi…and she STILL couldn't forgive him for not getting the famous blitz ball player's, Tidus, number- so it was a pretty popular place.

The only real way that the siblings could get in was because they knew the owner, Vincent Valentine. Despite that he was pretty much anti-social, once you got to know him he was a pretty cool guy.

Gah! Now he was just stalling…

He sighed. Let's just get this over with…

Entering the high-class restaurant, Kairi skipped up to the host and waited as the man looked for her name on a very long list. Finally after a few moments, the host nodded and proceeded to escort them to their table. "Right this way."

Riku paced behind his sister and the host and as they rounded the corner to the more private area, he could only fathom a guess as to how Kairi got them these great seats in the first place.

Vincent wasn't that nice…

He was dazing out again and hadn't noticed that both people in front of him had stopped, causing Riku to bump into his sister. She glared at him, while he sent her a sheepish grin.

"Sorry Kai."

She shook her head and continued to talk with someone, but he couldn't see since the host was in the way.

However, after the host left the silver-haired male was met with an eye full.

Long layered brown hair that stopped passed his shoulders, dark gray eyes that seemed to be shrouded with a mysterious gleam. His skin was tan and the black leather he was wearing only made him look sexier.

Damn...the silver-haired boy didn't mind a piece of that for dinner...yummy.

If Riku wasn't drooling now then he was about to in…three…two…one.

"And may I ask why your brother is drooling all over himself?"

Kairi whirled around to face her brother. His eyes were glazed over and a trail of drool was dangling from his chin. She giggled before ruffling his hair. Instantly, he snapped out ofhis daze and slapped her hand away, attempting to fix his perfect hair.

"Damn it."

She sighed. "Anyway, this is my dorky brother Riku."

Leon smirked, leaning back in his chair to study said boy. "Hmmph."

Her smile grew and her eyes, for a second, possessed a scheming gleam, but it was quickly replaced by a joyous one. "And Riku, this is Leon Leonhart. The author I was telling you about!"

Oh great! It was the perverted author!

He cringed at the thought. "You set me up with a pervert?"

Leon frowned then, eyes darkening. The silver-haired boy gulped before being forced to sit down opposite of the other.

"Well, you two behave! And if you're not home by one, Ku-Poo, I'll know what you're doing!" Snickering, Kairi dodged her older brother's hands that were trying to give her a noogie yet again. "Have fun!"

COME BACK, YOU CONNIVING BITCH! YOU'RE GOING TO BE DEAD MEAT WHEN I GET DONE WITH YOU!

Turning to face his date, Riku's face fell as he caught Leon staring at him. His lips twisted into a disgusted frown. Sure, he was sexy as hell, but he was still a pervert. "What are you looking at? Are you enthralled with my sexy beauty as well?"

Leon rolled his eyes. "Whatever."

This was going to be a long night…

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Gasp! What does Kairi and Rikku have planned? Will Riku survive his date with a so-called 'perverted author'? Find out in the next chapter of 'Acquired Taste'!

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Hehehehe. Hello everyone. Man, did I have fun with this. I hope everyone laughed as much as I did. I can't wait to write the next chapter. Anyway, a few notes before I dismiss you! Hehehehe!

1. Paula Abdul's Cold-Hearted song is not mine, I give credit to her since it is her song.

2. 'Don't Know Much About History' is an actual book and was written by Kenneth C. Davis. I do not own that.

3. The other books I made up and if they are real than I never knew that. O.o

4. I know Riku in the game isn't as goofy, but I wanted to portray another side of him that they don't show in the game. Everyone has a silly side, right? Exactly.

5. DON'T FORGET TO REVIEW! REVIEW! REVIEW!