A/N: I'm sorry. I don't know what this is. I don't know how it happened. It just did and I don't even know what to do with it.
"Babe, have you seen my black v-neck?"
Kensi stuck her head out of the bathroom, pulling her toothbrush out of her mouth so she could talk. "You have like eight. You seriously can't find a single one of them?"
"I don't want just any one of them. I want the one that's all soft because it's been washed so many times."
"I think it's in the dryer."
"I don't want to go all the way back downstairs." She watched him sit down on the edge of the bed, clearly exhausted.
"Well then just get it in the morning. Or wear one of the other seven black v-necks that are in the closet."
"But I don't want—"
"I know. You want the soft one. I got it."
She rinsed out her mouth and then joined him on their bed. "I have a question."
He shifted, putting an arm around her shoulders. "Anything. Ask away."
"What did you do to get the nickname 'one-man party'?"
He chuckled. "Seriously? After today, that's your question?"
"Um, yeah." She grinned, toying sweetly with one of his curls. "Priorities. Tell me, what stupid, drunken stunt you pulled to earn yourself that moniker."
"Why do you assume there was alcohol involved? I'll have you know that I made plenty of very stupid decisions in college while completely sober."
"You're stalling, party boy. Cough up the story or I'll call Kip." She held up her phone threateningly. If anyone would know the story, it would be him and she was sure he would be happy to share.
Deeks looked at her in mock incredulity. "You know, I almost got shot today. More than once."
"But you didn't because your woman was there to save your ass, again. Storytime. Now."
"Home is supposed to be less stressful than work," he groused good-naturedly as he settled into a more comfortable position. "The year was 1999."
"You were a junior."
"I was. I was already something of a legend due to a party from the year before that had involved a pool full of jello. My roommates and I had planned the party of the century for New Year's Eve and then we found out that the guys in the house down the street were planning a party too."
"And by party, you mean kegger."
"Whose story is this?"
"I'm helping! Continue."
"My roommates wanted to give up and cancel it. The other guys had a bigger house, more money, and were therefore more likely to draw a crowd. But College Marty never did anything half-assed. Especially not when there was competition."
"Oh god." Kensi looked absolutely delighted. "What did you do?"
"I may have rented a bounce house. And gotten a DJ. And borrowed an alpaca."
"You borrowed an alpaca?"
"Borrowed may be the wrong word since the owners never knew it was gone, but he got home safe and sound."
"How did you get a DJ and bounce house with no money?"
He smiled lazily. "Please. I managed to charm you into bed with me. I certainly can charm a few party vendors."
"You bribed them."
"Yes I did. With great success. But, it still wasn't enough."
"Oh no!"
"I had to do something drastic or risk losing my title as the one-man party. So, around midnight, after four shots of tequila," he paused for dramatic effect, "Magic Marty made a surprise appearance."
"Magic Marty met the one-man party!"
"It was a legendary night. People talked about it in reverent, hushed whispers for months. I stripped while doing a keg stand. I still don't know how that happened. I woke up eighteen hours later in a neighbor's shed. I was hungover for three days. And I vowed that never again would the one-man-party and Magic Marty meet on the same night. It's too dangerous."
"What if I told you I like to live on the wild side?" Kensi said coyly.
"I already knew that. I don't know though babe, this might be too much for even Badass Blye to handle."
"Well," she smiled, and leaned close to whisper seductively in his ear, "I'm willing to risk it if you are."
He sighed. "All right. Don't say I didn't warn you."
It turned out to be another legendary night.
