A/N: This contains references to the episode "Back in the Saddle Again" specifically, and other key episodes in season 1 that feature cheerful Molly's surprising temper. Hopefully that provides a context for some of the imagery! Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoy it! (Critiques welcome!)


Molly squeezed her eyes shut, but they were already stinging and wet. A day of pent-up frustration was finally coming to a head and it had to be here of all places, in front of her friends. She turned sharply and fled from the room, finally stumbling through a door at the end of a long hallway where she wouldn't have to face them. The looks on their faces flashed across her mind and they were all unmistakably tired and annoyed with her. Bailey had even said, "Are you going to do that 'get mad for no reason' thing again?" Or maybe all he said was, "Molly, calm down!" She'd felt so hot and her fuse so short she honestly couldn't remember.

And Alma. Molly threw her fists down at her sides and let out a loud frustrated sound, safe in the confines of this empty sitting room. Alma! Why did she have to say that? Molly furrowed her brows and stared hard at the carpet, feelings of tension and worry rising up again. Did Alma really think that way? Did the others? Were they all thinking that?

The door opened behind her.

"If you all really feel that way then maybe I should just leave!" Molly meant to say it angrily but her teary eyes made her voice watery. She sniffed and wiped her face quickly on her sleeves.

It was Sarah's voice that replied, soft and searching like almost always. "I just wanted to see if you're okay."

Molly groaned, hanging her head but still not turning around. She'd actually been hoping it was Alma who'd followed her. She was still mad, and Alma undoubtedly was too, but she didn't feel like putting up with Sarah's preachy, I'm-here-for-you, I-know-how-you-feel approach. Molly wondered dejectedly why that of all things would make her angry, but it kind of pricked her the wrong way. Maybe it was because Sarah was so perfect and kind, and she always got angry at the right times about the right things, and supplied an endless stream of "I believe in you" sentiments. Sarah was Too Nice, and the fact that sometimes Molly disliked that about her made Molly feel like she herself wasn't nice at all.

"What's wrong?" Sarah asked again after waiting a few moments.

Molly spun around and gave a big smile fueled by sharp sarcasm. "Nothing, Sarah! Honestly!" She eyed the door and realized if she really wanted to leave she'd have to find a way around.

Sarah just looked back and rubbed her arm, looking to think of what to say. Did anyone know what to say with Molly? She was just so unreasonable at these times that Bailey and Alma had given up a long time ago. New Girl hadn't really learned yet. Molly briefly thought back to the two of them walking with their horses, and pausing to stand in an open, grassy field with nothing but sky and mountain surrounding them, and snorted the memory away stubbornly. Sarah always thought she could help, and here she was yet again.

"Did Alma send you here? Or Bailey?" Molly finally said, crossing her arms and trying to keep her voice level and to-the-point. She swallowed thickly, trying hard, but a hot pang of anger and stress was growing between her eyebrows.

"No." Sarah frowned thoughtfully. "Molly, I just don't get why you're upset. If you wanted to talk about it I'd be happy to – "

Molly's simmering emotions suddenly burst like a dam breaking, and she threw down her arms and yelled at the top of her lungs, "I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT, SARAH! Okay?! I'm sick of everyone telling me what I have to do, like it's just going to fix all of my problems, when you don't even know what my problems are!"

Sarah looked visibly caught off guard at the sudden shouting. "Well, if you told me…" she stumbled, with wide eyes.

The tension ricocheted around inside of Molly and she felt trapped, looking desperately beyond Sarah to the escape. "I DON'T EVEN KNOW! Something's just wrong, okay? And I get mad, because I'm – I'm worried or something, and I just can't take it! And it's just something that everybody has to deal with, because it's – I'm just a big PROBLEM! But you all don't have to deal with me anymore, okay?! I'm going!"

Sarah was clearly backing off and giving a wide path to the door, but Molly's arms and legs were shaking so hard so couldn't move. She felt furious and sad and hurt, and she wanted or needed to be left alone right now, but she was also desperately afraid they were going to leave her. And she remembered the looks on her friends' faces, on Sarah's face right now. Molly brought her hand up and bit down on her knuckles really hard, tears pooling up and spilling down her cheeks. She wanted to hide her face, feelings of shame washing over her again. "I'm SORRY! I can't fix it! I – I don't what's wrong."

Molly knew she was supposed to be fun and positive – she wanted to be – but the tension that would build up inside of her sometimes just got to be too much and she wasn't strong enough to face it. Some days all that tension would wrack her completely, and it's like she wanted everyone else to be miserable with her so she wouldn't have to feel so bad alone. Why couldn't she just be nice? Why did she have to let it get to her like that? She wasn't really even sure she knew what It was.

She gripped Sarah tighter and sniffed wetly into the fabric of her shirt, throat tight and aching, and then realized belatedly that they weren't standing apart anymore. Sarah had thrown her arms around her and pulled her into a tight embrace. Their faces were wet and the two held each other tightly, Molly's knees limp and almost buckled entirely, like Sarah was supporting her and holding her body up.

Sarah and Molly had once spent an early afternoon standing out in that wide, grassy field and speaking in gentle, quiet voices. Sarah had been soft, sunny, and encouraging like always, clearly hopeful that her tactics would help Molly get back on that horse. But before that, there had been the feeling of rough, packed dirt grinding into her cheek and elbow, and her back and hips hurt badly, and she couldn't breathe for so long. When Molly could finally breathe again, she opened her eyes and saw Will, and then Sarah, and then everybody else. The whole entourage was all looking at her, and they'd seen her fall off Calypso's back when everybody else had made it.

"We're not giving up on you, Molly." Sarah said in her quietest voice, interrupting Molly's thoughts. "We're not giving you up. Not for anything."

Molly's face crumpled but her noises stifled, face wet and hurting. "Sorry–" She breathed out hoarsely. She couldn't make it over that jump.

"No, it's okay," Sarah said, "I love you."

You did it, Molly! Sarah had shouted with wild abandon, when Molly came joyously riding back with the vet that day. I believed in you! I knew it, I knew it!

Molly had made it. She had, she had. Just not at first. Molly tried to hold onto that like she was holding onto Sarah.

"I believe in you." Sarah said softly, apparently not knowing what else to say. She sniffed and cradled Molly's downcast head with her arms more tightly. "Everything's going to be okay with Alma, all right? Don't worry about it. … Friends fight, and they get mad and yell… but I think we're all just afraid of being alone."

Molly didn't know what to say either. She sank tiredly further into the hug.

I believe in you, Sarah always said, again and again countless times before. It didn't fix it, but it helped.