I have no excuse for this, other than the fact that I needed to explain my other fic, Life is but a dream, and my friend's mom is pregnant with baby #11.(7 if you only count the ones who lived :( ) I take no responsibility for any brain scarring that occurs. Enjoy!
Disclaimer : I ain't Stan Lee. I own nothing.
Life started out fairly normally for Dr. Hank McCoy, aka The Beast. He had created yet another centuries-ahead-of-it's-time gadget, and was now eating lunch. Suddenly, Kurt Wagner burst into the room. "Dr. McCoy! Magneto is in Britain, and der British policemen vont us to come and take care of him!" Beast stared at Kurt. "Britain? What's Magneto doing there?" Kurt shrugged. "I don't know, " he said. "All I know is, we're de only ones who can take care of him. Do you have some vay to get der fast? I don't think I could get there without passing out." Beast adjusted his lapels and grinned. "As it so happens, I not only have a way to get there fast, but make sure Magneto never bothers us again!" He led Kurt into a wardrobe, and they came out again in The Parade in Leamington. Magneto could be seen, standing on top of a Tesco's delivery lorry in an adjoining street. "How did you know where he vas?" Asked Kurt. Beast tapped the side of his nose. "Plot hole, my friend. I'll explain everything later." They ran towards Magneto, who was strangely doing nothing other than standing on the lorry. He appeared to have a beach-ball under his stomach. He noticed them. "What do you want? I'm not hurting anyone. Go away." Beast looked around. The people were occasionally glancing up at him, but there were no screams. Magneto sniffed. "I'm hungry!" He casually used his powers to fling the lorry towards the nearby Costa. Beast had no choice but to use the shiny gadget to save the man and woman sitting in the window. He pressed a shiny button. A beam of blue light burst out of it and hit the two directly before the lorry crushed them. Magneto calmly flew into the wrecked building on a manhole cover, and started to eat a cake and bacon sandwich. Beast ran in. "Magneto, what are you doing? And what's under your shirt? Magneto demolished his sandwich and wiped his mouth. "I know I was irresponsible, but I do like the idea of being a parent. I'm pregnant! " Beast gaped in horror. He and Kurt could only watch, horrorstruck, as Magneto got back on his manhole cover and flew off. Kurt shook his head. "I need a drink." Beast nodded. "Let's give this one to the police. I need alcohol." The two walked away. "By the way, vat vas that gadget you planned to use on Magneto?" "Oh, it was supposed to transport whoever was caught in the beam to another dimension..."
Sorry if I damaged your brain. This is really only to patch up my other fic, which, if you're into Lotr, you should check out. Sorry again for my shameful self-advertising! :D
