A/N: It's that time of year again. Yes Thanksgiving when your bizarre relatives come over. And this is just a funny idea I got thinking about it.
Disclaimer: I do not own Super Smash Brothers
I now Present…. Thanksgiving at the Smash Mansion.
Peach and Zelda were busy working in the kitchen. Peach sat down and sighed. "I really wish Samus would help with the cooking she's a woman to!" Peach said as she rubbed her feet.
"You know that's kind of a sexist comment saying that only we women have to work." Zelda said with a frown.
"I mean look at Mewtwo he's helping to by making his salads." She said as Mewtwo flew into the room humming.
"Yea but he's gay!" Peach replied.
Mewtwo stopped what he was doing and began crying he then flew off into his room.
Meanwhile in the living room many of the Smashers were gathered watching the football game. Bowser and Donkey Kong took up one couch and were both munching away on the chips and dip and if anyone else tried to eat any they attacked them. "Hey DK I bet you 100 bucks that Packers win." Bowser said as he swatted a desperate Pichu away.
"Deal." Donkey Kong said as the Lions scored a touchdown.
Bowser swore in anger. Snake was sitting on the floor groaning. "Ohhhhh so hungry," He moaned. "Why won't Peach let us have some food?"
"It's tradition to torture us." Mario said as Wario farted and laughed.
Snake smirked. "Well I've never failed a mission." He replied and did a ninja roll out of the living room.
Young Link ran into the living room and had a worried look on his face. "Have any of you seen Gobbler?" He said while trying to hold back tears.
Samus stood up. "Who's Gobbler hun?" She asked as a cry of anger came from Bowser for the Lions had scored again.
"He's my pet turkey and I can't find him anywhere." Young Link told her.
"Well I'll help you find him kiddo." She said and they were off.
Meanwhile outside by the smashers pool Fox was taking a swim. Roy and Marth were sword fighting and Falco was sitting up in a tree reading.
Fox jumped out of the pool and smelt the air. He could smell the turkey cooking and he smiled. "Hey Falco can you smell that turkey I bet you can't wait to eat it!" Fox said with a laugh as he shook the water out of his fur.
"No I'm not going to be eating it. And please Fox put some pants on nobody wants to see that dangly thingy." Falco said with disgust.
"No I'm not gonna wear any pants today unless the Pokemon start wearing pants. And why in god's blue earth aren't you eating any turkey?" Fox asked as Roy dropped his sword and threw up after looking over and seeing Fox without pants.
Marth laughed for a few seconds until he saw the sight and then he began crying and running away in fear. "Ok the reason the Pokemon don't wear pants is because you can't see there ding a lings and I won't eat a turkey because it's another bird and that is cannibalism!" Falco said as Fox began to pee.
"What it's out I have to go I might as well do it!" Fox shouted as Falco rolled his eyes.
Meanwhile back in the mansion outside of the kitchen.
Snake leaned up against the kitchen wall as so that neither Peach nor Zelda would see him. He knocked on the wall to lure one of them out and he quickly rolled into a shadowy corner. Zelda walked into the hallway and continued walking down the hall. "Hmm. That's strange I could've swore I heard somethi…" She said interrupted as she was shot with a sleeping dart.
Snake quickly grabbed her and pulled her body into another room and hid her. He grabbed his cardboard box and put it over himself crawling closer to the kitchen stopping right outside of the kitchen.
Peach walked out and stopped in front of the box staring at it for a second. "Hmm. Was this box here earlier?" She asked herself and she left to go find Zelda.
Snake quickly snuck into the kitchen and was about to have some of the pumpkin pie when Peach returned. She brandished her umbrella and popped it open as Snake began firing his machine gun at her. Her umbrella was bullet proof. She charged forward bellowing and she thrust her umbrella forward striking Snake in the eye. "OH MY GOD MY EYE!" He cried out in pain as the umbrella gouged his right eye.
Blood spewed forward and Peach laughed. "HA THAT TEACHS YOU TO TRY AND EAT BEFORE ANYONE ELSE!" She shrieked as she sent him out of the kitchen.
Snake ran out of the kitchen crying as he pulled the umbrella out and covering his wounded eye. Meanwhile Young Link and Samus stood outside of Captain Falcon's room. "Alright kid be ready this guy is sick, twisted and perverted and could be very well doing something to Gobbler that will scar you for life." Samus said charging up her gun just in case.
When they opened up the door they saw Captain Falcon lying on his bed in a dress and high heels with a wig on. Bottles of beer lay all over the floor. "25 bottles of beer on the wall take one down and pass it around 24 bottles of beer on the wall." Captain Falcon said as he finished another beer.
Young Link looked up at Samus with a look of fear as Captain Falcon walked over to them. "Alright I know this looks bad but trust me it's all good I just like the breeze up there." Captain Falcon said as he stumbled over to them.
"Have you seen a turkey named Gobbler?" Samus asked as Captain Falcon opened another bottle of beer.
"Yea but I'm only gonna tell you if you make out with me!" Captain Falcon said making a kissy face at Samus.
"Alright that's it your dead!" Samus shouted and fired a giant blue ball of energy from her arm cannon.
Captain Falcon took the hit and smashed against his wall leaving an imprint of his body in it. "All right I'll tell you jeez." Captain Falcon said rubbing his ribs.
He sat down on his bed and sighed. "I saw the turkey yesterday getting chased by Yoshi. But that's all I know so don't come back here to harass me unless you'd like to caress me." Captain Falcon told them with a smirk.
Samus ignored him and they went off to find Yoshi.
Meanwhile back outside the living room. Pichu and gathered an army of his brethren. "Alright that fatty named Bowser won't let us have any chips and dip…SO WE MUST TAKE IT FROM THEM!" Pichu cried while waving a spear in the air.
The army of Pichu's all waved there spears. Each one of them was wearing a variety of Viking helmets, knight helmets, Spartan helmets and top hats. "FOR SPARTA!" One Pichu cried out.
There leader stopped waving his spear. "Who said that? This isn't Sparta this is Pichuland you idiot!" The leader cried out in anger.
There was silence among the Pichu before the leader Pichu spoke up again. "Alrighty Pichu it's every Pichu for himself. On my signal give them hell!" The leader Pichu commanded as his army of Pichu all waved there spears.
"PURPLE HAZE ALL IN MY BRAIN!" Pichu cried out which was the signal since he was a huge Jimi Hendrix fan.
Watching the army of three hundred Pichu charge into the living room was a majestic sight. Bowser set the bowl of chips down and the dip and began swinging at the small Pichu a few went flying to there deaths. "DON'T SHOW HIM ANY MERCY!" The leader Pichu cried out as he leapt for the jugular.
Pichu landed and began electrocuting Bowser making the giant Koopa king fall to the ground landing on twenty other Pichu. Donkey Kong got off the couch he swung his fist sending ten more of the pichu army to there doom. The Pichu army began chucking spears at Donkey Kong sending him to the ground. "NOW GRAB THE CHIPS AND DIP!" The Pichu leader cried out as Bowser began to get up sending him flying across the room.
Before the Pichu leader hit a wall he grabbed onto Mario's hair making the red plumber jump up in shock. Pichu shocked the plumber knocking him out and sending him to the ground.
Wario looked up and swung his fist at the Pichu who was in midair. The strike sent Pichu onto a chandelier. "Our lord what will we do without you?" The army cried out to there leader.
"GO MY BRETHREN! I SHALL NOT DIE IN VAIN!" He cried out as he stabbed his spear into the ceiling breaking the foundation holding the chandelier to break. The light fixture fell smashing into Wario's head. Wario blacked out instantly. Pichu quickly sprinted out of the living room and into his room to enjoy the treasures of victory.
Meanwhile outside of Yoshi's room. "LET'S GET HIM!" Young Link bellowed unsheathing his sword ready for combat.
"Hey we don't even know if Gobbler has. So just settle down." Samus said as they opened up the door.
Yoshi was playing a game on the computer he spun around and waved. "What's up?" He asked.
"We heard you were chasing Gobbler yesterday and wondering if you know anything about his disappearance." Samus asked.
"I was chasing him because he crapped on my foot. I ended up chasing him back into Young Link's room but that was the last time I saw him." Yoshi told them.
"Ok thanks." Samus said and they left.
Meanwhile back outside by the pool.
"Ok fine you make a good point that Pokemon don't have these things so I'll put my pants back on." Fox said grabbing his pants off the ground and putting them back on.
"Thank you." Falco said jumping down from the tree.
"DINNER IS READY!" Peach cried out so everyone could hear.
"YES!" Fox cried out in joy running into the mansion.
5 minutes later at the dinner table.
Everyone was at the table except for a few such as Pichu and his army, Mewtwo because of Peach's comment about his sexuality and Ganadorf who was going through an emo I want to be alone stage.
Everyone sat at the table letting the aroma of the food get into there noses. "Hey Snake why do you have an eye patch on?" Ness asked as he flung corn at the Ice Climbers.
Snake was about to say something when Peach gave him an evil eye. "Um I fell down the stairs." He said anxiously.
Fox was stuffing his face with the turkey which this year was larger then any other before. "Hey Peach where did you get this thing it's huge and taste like God's spit that's how good it is!" Fox said as he got more of the turkey.
"Oh I found it in Young Link's room." Peach said with a smile.
Young Link dropped his fork and spit all the food out of his mouth. "YOU WHORE!" He cried out in anger pulling his sword out.
Peach got out of her seat and began running as Young Link chased her down the hall ways. As she began to run down the stores Young Link stopped quickly grabbing his bow and nocking a flaming arrow. He took aim and fired setting her dress on fire. "STOP DROP AND ROLL!" She shouted to herself as she fell to the ground and began rolling.
Suddenly she was lifted into the air and Mewtwo was standing there laughing at her. "CALL ME GAY AGAIN!" He shouted in anger sending her flying at Young Link.
He pulled a bomb out of his backpack and threw it at her. It exploded and sent Peach flying out of the mansion through a window. "Thank you." Mewtwo said towards Young Link with a smile.
Young Link turned a fire burning in his eye. "Gobbler's vengeance must be completed. I will kill all who have eaten him." Young Link said nocking another arrow into his bow.
Meanwhile back in the dining room. "Hey Bowser Lions won now were is my 100 bucks?" Donkey Kong asked.
"I was joking man." Bowser said laughing at Donkey Kong.
"Oh really?" Donkey Kong said reaching underneath the table and then pulling out a coconut shooter.
Bowser instantly reached into his wallet and tossed Donkey Kong the money. "Somebody's pushy when it comes to money." Bowser said as he sat back down.
The dining room door opened up and Young Link stepped in. He shut the door behind him and grinned. It was a grin that showed everyone in the room that Young Link had lost his sanity. "You ate Gobbler so now you're all going to die!" Young Link shouted and fired his first arrow which struck Snake in his only good eye.
Snake fell the ground writhing in pain. Falco got up and put his wings in the air. "Hey man I'm with you I didn't eat him that's cannibalism." Falco said hoping he wouldn't be killed.
Donkey Kong jumped up and aimed his coconut shooter at Falco. "Hey man if were all going to die you're dying to!" Donkey Kong shouted as he pulled the trigger.
The coconut struck Falco in the chest and sent him flying out of the dining room window and into the pool. "I CAN'T SWIM! Tweet, Tweet help me I'm just a young bird!" Falco shouted as he began to drown.
Donkey Kong spun around and began firing at Young Link who blocked with his shield. The coconuts flew off to the left and hit Ness in the head killing him with a severe concussion.
Donkey Kong was out of coconuts and gulped. Young Link chucked his boomerang but the boomerang was sucked up by Kirby. "YAY YOU SAVED MY LIFE!" Donkey Kong cheered.
He then realized Kirby was choking to death on it. "NO!" Donkey Kong shouted as he grabbed Kirby and began performing the Heimlich maneuver. The boomerang flew out of Kirby's mouth and struck both the Ice Climbers killing them both.
Young Link caught the boomerang and smiled. Roy and Marth both stood up and sprinted forward ready to die fighting. Young Link quickly pulled two bombs out of his backpack and chucked them at his two assailants.
They both fell dead from the force of the impact. Bowser stood up from his chair and laughed. "Ok we outnumber you so there's no way you can defeat us!" Bowser said getting into a fighting stance.
"Really?" Young Link said with a maniac's grin as he opened up the dinning room doors to reveal a sea of Pokemon gathered in the mansion. "I think Pichu would disagree."
Pichu was standing on top of a chair. "Today we gather outside of this dining room to help a new ally in the war against the smashers of the mansion. His name is Young Link. The residents of this place ate his pet turkey. Now we must avenge Gobbler. A new dawn is here. A POKEMON RULE! WHO'S WITH ME?" Pichu said rallying his forces.
All of
the Pokemon bellowed in agreement and they then charged forward into
the dinning room. Young Link jumped over the massive invasion and
smiled. "Happy Thanksgiving everybody and remember if you eat
turkey this year I will come to your house and I will kill every
living thing in it. But other then that have fun stuffing your fat
faces!"
THE END.
