Jeremiah Ashkenazi, sixteen years old...And I am a Jew.
Two years ago I wouldn't have even told you my name. I would have tried my hardest to keep my mere identity cloaked underneath a ponderous blanket of lies. You see, my country suffered an atrocious era. As though the entire Jewish kind had been cursed.
Too many indescribable heart-breaking events occurred during this vile time. It's painful to think. It destroys you when someone you love loses their life because of something they believe in so passionately. The war changed my whole perspective on life.
But, it wasn't always so bad...
Then again the day in which I have my happiest memory is also the day that lingers unexpectedly in my worst nightmares
"JEREMIAH! JEREMIAH! WAKE UP!"
I rubbed my tired, sleep-craving eyes roughly and peered towards the colourful calendar stuck to my smooth, pale blue wall. YESSS! It was the day; I'd been waiting for it all year, the one I'd be saving up for, for weeks. It had finally come. The Berlin annual trains festival. I leaped out of my bed hitting the cold textured wood flooring hard, causing it to scream THUD! I could almost taste the strong, distinct metallic morning smell that loomed awkwardly in the air. The room looked the same as usual, small and simple with a few pieces of unmatched need-only traditional furniture.
"Carmela I know, but there are no two ways about it" dad's deep voice croaked, the way it always did when mum questioned him in the morning.
Great! They're awake, now one of them will definitely be able to take me to the festival.
I slipped on my already prepared clothes and sped hastily towards the bottom of the stairs. The hot smell of pancakes that usually filled my cold squishy lungs at this time was replaced by the disturbing stench of fear.
I glanced at the room. My heart was racing, my head swimming uncontrollably. The grand living room that was usually jam packed with antique furniture, small animal shaped ornaments and collectables was blank. The baby pink and white decorative wallpaper had been stripped bare to reveal an unpleasant shade of grey crumbling concrete. Every last object had disappeared, from the light bulbs to the exorbitant new fireplace leaving a giant gash in the heart of the living room that lead to the next forsaken area. Thousands of questions clouded my mind. People were the only commodities in the abandoned space. Mum and dad sitting in the middle of the empty room, mum curled into a ball, sobbing into dad's muscular chest. I sped towards them shakily.
"Daniel, is this the only way that we can save our souls from slaughter?" Mum cried into the hollow of dad's neck.
By now my heart was beating out of my cage like chest. What was going on? Why didn't they tell me before? I started to feel nauseous tasting blood in my mouth I realised I'd been biting my tongue worriedly. My grip automatically fastened on to the edge of my warm, soft shirt sleeve as if my body needed something to hold onto to stop myself from shouting out the questions that flooded my mind. Mums slim body looked so helpless on the solid ground.
"Jeremiah we need to tell you something" dad whispered throatily
He looked slowly up at me with blood shot red, watery eyes. He looked exhausted as if he hadn't slept for weeks
"Sssonn the Nazi's are cccoming to take us away ffrom our homes. Ggo up stairs and ppack everything you would need if we were camping, take everything valuable and everything with a sentimental value. Try as hard as you can to make your room as inhabitable as possible. I will not let those vile beasts live in my home"
He looked down, his olive skin gleaming in the light and mumbled something to himself that sounded like "even if it kills me"
My heart sank deeper than imaginable the day that made my whole body tingle with joy had just turned into a fight for life. When I woke up that morning, never would I have expected what was coming next...
I was just about to turn my head towards the stairs when...
BAAAAMMM!
CCRRAASSHH!
Five Nazi soldiers charged in braking down the oak door encrusted with glass shaped diamonds. The door was only a few metres away from me. Sharp fragments of glass were hurled into the air, some slicing my face. Blood was cascading down my cheeks. Mums shrieks rang in my ears and they still do to this day..."PLEASE FOR GODS SAKE DON'T TAKE THE CHILD, HAVE MERCY!"
Everything happened so fast that it was just a blur. I remember that my body went completely numb, my vision was hazy and the putrid stench of gun powder filled my nose. My body collapsed to the ground, too numb to even attempt to rise. My surroundings became completely pitch-black.
I can't recall of any memories of the time that passed whilst I was in this "sleep" I imagine its best this way.
However I hoped that I would never have woke to live what happened next...
I awoke to see at least thirty weak skeleton-like people forcefully crammed into an microscopic train compartment. Decaying dead bodies covered the wooden floor. At first I thought I was in hell, a hell specifically designed for me. How else could something I loved , something that fascinates me so much, something like a train, change into something that wouldn't even enter my worst nightmares. Although there were so many people and different smells in the wrecked compartment nothing could overpower the indescribable stench of the rotting corpses. I tried my best to hold my breath but my mouth was just to dry. Most of the boxed room was made of grainy damaged wood, with the exception of the nails that held it together and were being forced into my fleshy back because of the extreme lack of space as well as the solid iron bars that covered square holes cut into one of the "walls" which looked like make-do windows. I felt hot sweaty and unclean. Warm damp bodies pushed against me in the struggle to breathe fresh air. Thousands of voices called out for liberty...But some had just lost faith.
The only thing that kept me whole was knowing that mum and dad were beside me.
After days of starving and watching others breathe their last breaths. At last we arrived at Auschwitz. Extremely weak, ill and dying. The Nazi soldiers loaded us off the trains as if we were animals and sorted us into groups. They told us to leave our luggage and it will be returned to us later. For some weird reason I couldn't trust any words that came out of their mouths. I looked up to see a huge array of buildings all so close together, they were made from dark bricks, the structure looked as safe as a deer in the presence of a lion. There were gigantic chimneys with huge clouds of smoke streaming from the top, the smell was horrid and the others were coughing into their shirts whilst trying not to breathe it in. The camp on a whole was a high security prison. Barbed wire fences and armed guards lined the outside. Sandy rocks crunched beneath my feet as I pushed violently against the others to get into the group that I was sorted into.
Nazi soldiers repeatedly shouted words like "useful" and "useless" whilst referring to different groups. Mum had always walked with a limp so she was put into the group with elderly people and small children...what was coming subsequently I still remember crystal clearly... Mum was never one to go down without a fight. She started to shout insults at the soldiers "GOD WILL BE YOUR JUDGE!YOU'LL BURN IN HELL" one of the guards was furious he took off his gun and
BAAAMMM!
My world crumbled before my eyes, fire broke out from inside my chest, and nothing else in the world mattered. The main thing that had kept me going so far was gone. I couldn't keep it inside me anymore the fire was over powering. I leapt towards her. Soldiers rushed towards me threatening me with guns, holding me back with all their force. I heard a voice in the back of my head. Till this day I still believe that that voice saved me from losing my life as well... It was mum "son, live for me"
After that I did what I was told, Mum would have wanted it that way. At the time I looked older than I actually was, so I was kept alive to work. It was excruciatingly hard manual labour; I was forced to carry dead bodies in a wheel barrow from the gas chambers to the crematoriums.
"WAKE UP JEWS! WAKE UP!"
BANG! BANG! BANG!
I was woken by soldiers and the sound of gun shots at 4:00 am I knew that the day ahead of me would be sheer agony; I was marched into the dining hall along with the others we were led by a fellow Jew who was working for the Nazi's. We entered the hall. It was a large room with a high ceiling it contained rows of rusty metal chairs and tables, enough to feed the entire camp on. By that time I was sure that the camp use to be a prison. At one side of the room there was large kitchen with Jewish workers wearing the same uniform as everyone else in the camp except for the soldiers.
My father had been separated from me, to work in the kitchens because at home he worked as a baker. At least I knew he was safe. I walked slowly towards the serving area at the front of the kitchen and started to queue up with the others. I felt as if there was no hope at all to escape. As the queue moved forward a hand from the serving area shoved a bowl of what looked like wet cement into my hand along with half a slice of bread this was what I had to work on for the rest of the day and most of the night. The voice which the hand belonged to whispered "Break out midnight crematorium"
I shuffled along and went to sit on the rusty chairs, everyone was given exactly five minutes to eat their soup and bread then sent to work. My soup smelt terrible and tasted vile too, the bread was like chewing on carpet however still seemed edible. I knew that if I didn't eat now the next time would be tomorrow morning so I quickly shovelled it down. 11:40 pm I had never experienced that much pain in my entire life, my body felt like a machine, and I ached all over if there was such a thing as living hell this was it. I felt lucky I couldn't have imagined how life was like for people in the other camps or twins being experimented on. I walked slowly towards the crematorium; I took the long way round to buy myself some time still carrying my wheel barrow even though the job had been completed through back breaking efforts all day. Every inch of the cobbled stone flooring dug into the arches of my worn feet. The hallway was long and narrow with the same high ceiling as before. I forced my energy drained body along, still clutching onto the wheel barrow for support an icy shiver found its way down my skeletal spine. Everything was silent except for the soft sounds of my footsteps and the rickety noises coming from the loose parts of the wheel barrow. After an unbearable twenty minutes of stumbling across elongated passageways and hallways I had finally reached my destination.
The crematorium midnight. I soon realised whose voice had told me about the break out... It was Dad. He hugged me tightly as if to ensure that I was safe. When he had concluded that I was fine he let go. "Jeremiah, the plan is simple, there are two more of us and they will be here in a minute, they work on construction and found a passage way that leads outside from the tools room. It is the only place where there isn't any cameras however the guards will be patrolling so we'll have to be extra careful the others told me this information in exchange of food from the kitchens, I was so desperate I took the risk, whatever you do stick with me" His tone was sophisticated and the way he spoke seemed thoroughly thought out. I started to choke into my shirt the stench in the crematorium was insufferable. The room where I met Dad was a small, dark, leaky storage room leading off to the main body of the crematorium. Sure enough a minute later, two figures walked into the room it was too dark to make out any features but dad assured me it was them. 12:15. The chilly wind whipped against my pale face and for the first time in days I breathed in fresh air. I felt as through instead of breathing in, I was drinking the icy oxygen. Dad was behind me and the other two in front, we tip-toed silently across the vast grounds towards the tools room. The surroundings were pitch-black but I could feel the open air and dew soaked grass brushed against my dry ankles. My companions in front slowed to a halt and I heard the high-pitched squeal of a rusty, un-oiled door open up. I swallowed as much crisp air as I could before entering the gloomy tools room. Surprisingly the room smelt better than expected, it was a medium sized room and was home to at least fifty different types of equipment. Dad told us all to grab a shovel each just in case because we still had other obstacles to cover. We quickly started to cover more ground and began to pick up speed as we sprinted through the damp murky tunnels. Noises of heavy footsteps and loud voices filled my ears. "I'll check down here you stay up there" Everyone else was busy concentrating on escaping that they didn't hear anything. I signalled for them to stop and they immediately did so. We all listened anxiously as the footsteps approached us. Shovels at the ready...
BAAAMMM!
Dad had knocked the soldier clean out, his body lay there motionless and pale. We heard another set of footsteps and ran as fast as our fragile bodies could take us. Air whooshed past me and the ground became steeper until I could see a glimmer of liberation at the end of my dark voyage. The light opened my heart to a freedom full era and I felt that the hell that had consumed me previously was now burnt into nothingness and all I was left with was heaven. We took a train journey to Czechoslovakia. We changed in the train Aaron and Ellis the other two who helped us escape brought a bag of clothes and food. I feared that we'd be caught but arrived safely. We were accepted by the other Jewish escapees and were lucky that Aaron could speak Czech. Two years on we live and work in a simple bakery. The war has ended and at last I can freely say: My name is Jeremiah Ashkenazi, I'm sixteen years old and I am a Jew.
