Part 1: Forgiven
Colonel Roy Mustang knelt briefly before the grave to place a flower at the base of the headstone and trace the name with a gloved hand. Maes Hughes. There were already two lilies there, meaning that Gracia had come by earlier with Elyshia. Slowly Roy rose, tucking his hands into the pockets of his uniform which still bore the black funeral sash he had attached to it that morning. In a broken voice he began to speak, his hoarse words shattering the thick, eerie silence.
"Hey, Maes. It's Roy. Yeah. I'm back. I just wanted to talk. I had to bury another friend this morning. More than a friend. Ed's gone, Maes. Edward is dead.
"It was Hawkeye who found him. Well, Al really, but he was still hovering over his brother's body, frozen in silence when Riza got there. His arm. He transmuted his automail arm and slit his throat. Damn near severed his head."
Mustang paused for a moment, trying to clear the tears from his throat. He pulled a small, brown envelope from his uniform pocket, turning it over several times, studying it with distressed concentration before he continued to speak.
"There was a note in the pocket of his coat. That long, red one with his teacher's insignia that he always wore. We buried him in that coat. Al asked for that. He said his brother never wore his uniform, so why bury him in it. Even if he was a soldier. Al said it would just be throwing it in his face that he was a dog of the military. He wanted Ed buried in his own clothes, and we obliged. The only difference was his gloves. I replaced his with my favorite spark-cloth pair.
"Hawkeye – Riza – brought me the note when she came to tell me he was gone. I just stared at it for… must've been nearly an hour, before I read it, just waiting for the news to sink in. But that didn't happen until I read the letter."
Mustang removed the letter from its envelope and began to read it aloud to his friend.
"Roy,
By the time you read this I will be gone. I know it may be difficult for you to understand, but I cannot stay here. The sins I carry are too heavy, the scars they leave too deep. There is no longer a place for me among the living. I should have died for my sins a long time ago. It was not an easy decision for me to come to and I know it will not be an easy decision for you to accept, but I feel that this is all that remains for me. Please take care of Alphonse for me. Remember I love you, Roy. I always have. Goodbye. Thank you for making my life worth being her for.
With eternal love,
Edward Elric"
Roy's voice broke and hot tears flooded down his face as he shouted up at the heavens. "Damnit Ed! How could you? How could you leave me alone like this? What were you thinking? What was in your head when you wrote that?" His voice began to crack and fade. "What were you thinking when you transmuted your arm? As you pressed the blade to your throat?"
Finally his voice was no more than a cracked and broken whisper. "What were you thinking? Why didn't you come to me? I loved you. But now… now you're… gone….
"You knew, Maes, didn't you? I never told you, but I didn't have to. You knew. I never had to tell you anything. You always knew before I told you. There's no way you didn't know. That I was in love with Edward. He never told me he felt the same until after you were….
"I miss you, Maes. You know, I still sit in my office sometimes and wait for you to call to tell me some pointless story about your daughter. As angry as I always seemed, you never failed to make me smile. But now… Now you're gone… and Edward… is gone…. Maes, who do I live for? When you were here I lived for you. After you were gone I gave my life to Edward. But now…."
Words failed the colonel and he dropped to his knees, reaching out to touch the cold marble of the tombstone. He was still kneeling when Riza Hawkeye came to find him. Gently she took his elbow and pulled him to his feet. She led him back to the waiting car and drove him home, but he objected.
"Take me to HQ. I can't go home right now. I don't think I could stand it," Roy choked without lifting his head.
Hawkeye nodded and headed for headquarters. She was concerned for her superior, but she obeyed. Once Mustang had settled himself behind his desk he dismissed her, leaving her to worry.
When he had listened to the click of the door latch and the sound of his lieutenant's footsteps fading along the corridor he opened the bottom drawer of his desk. He took out a nondescript tinted glass bottle and two glasses, filling them both. He set one glass opposite himself on the desk and took the other in his hands. It was something he and Hughes used to do during hard times; just retreat to Mustang's office for a drink and discuss what was going on. But now Hughes was gone. In silence Mustang emptied his glass and refilled it, staring all the while at Hughes' glass, untouched on the far side of the desk. He broke the silence with a mournful sigh and refilled his glass again.
Soon two hours had passed. Mustang had finished over three-quarters of the bottle and could hardly lift his head from the desk. Still he stared at Hughes' untouched glass. Suddenly something caught his eye. Hughes stood opposite him, smiling and waving. His hand rested on the shoulder of a short, golden-eyed boy with long blond hair. Ed. Mustang raised his head dazedly, but as soon as he blinked the two figures vanished. In anguish Roy cried out and let his head fall back onto the desk, watching as everything faded to black.
A/N: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist
