Here in the UK we've only just been introduced to Blaine. Me and my friend X- Deidara's lover -X, who are on constant lookout for Kurt's potential love interest, have decided to dub the Blaine/Kurt relationship Blurt.
An awkward silence. It always started with an awkward silence but the silence that follows is different, almost painful.
My aunt says it's because I'm so eager to fill the conversation, as if it's some adorable little quirk and not, in fact, a cruel twist of fate whereby my mouth has been incorrectly wired to my brain. Whenever there's a lapse in the conversation, the kind that happens when a subject isn't quite dead but nobody has anything to contribute, my mouth would blurt out independent from my brain and often uttering the most humiliating thing on the tip of its tongue. And then there would be silence.
The awkward silence after I have just announced to all of my friends, before having never even told my mother, that I like boys. It is in these sorts of situations that one's shoelaces or the fuzzy green carpeting become immensely interesting, but I tore my eyes away to look at the other boys. They are staring at me with shock, disgust or some mixture therein. The silence continues and I can't help but feel that somehow this is worse than it would be if they were screaming abuse.
I think that it's the stress of moving to a new school to escape the bullying that has caused my problem to get a lot worse. I have actually started to recognise the signs: first the conversation settles into silence and its participant's voices wind down to a murmur like an engine cooling down as they each stare into space. Then a certain tingling feeling settles in my stomach with a grim finality, but by this point there is nothing I can do.
I had just admitted to my two friends, the only new friends I have thus far had a chance to make, that I love Celine Dion. Admittedly not as major a confession as I have previously made but in moments of dread one rarely considers such small matters as perspective and proportion. In those few short seconds the familiar second silence permeated our conversation and to my desperate mind seemed to flaunt itself like a victorious opponent.
"You like music?" asked Wes "You should try out for the Dalton Academy Warblers".
"Yeah," agreed David "heard them practicing some Katy Perry song the other day".
"BLAINE!"
How had Kurt Hummel managed to get into my room?
"When I agreed to go out with you I didn't think you would start to behave so weirdly around me. I was fine with us not dating but when you asked me out I didn't think that to you meant spending the entire awkward date unable to form coherent sentences."
God he's adorable when he's mad, his chin makes this little pouty expression.
"You know if this isn't going to work out between us you should just come out and say it, don't leave me here confused."
But how could I even begin to explain the way he had started to make me feel. The throbbing, gooey, warm mess of emotions my heart had managed to dump on me. The way words came to my damn mouth and died right there in the tip of my tongue, leaving me stammering under his gaze.
Kurt clearly had more to say but had stopped to organise his thoughts, leaving open the silence of an inexhausted topic. A tingling feeling settles in my stomach.
"I love you."
