Disclaimer... I don't own Harry Potter.


Dear Fanfiction Writers,

It has come to my attention that you all are lovely writers, truly, but for some reason, I keep seeing something that does not please me in the least.

I, Harry James Potter, do not have brothers or sisters, let alone am I The-Girl-Who-Lived. Also, I'm not a vampire, so stop portraying me so.

Also, as many of you know when you read the book, I am a straight man that married Ginny. I have not, and I never will shag:

-Ron (He's my best mate for crying out loud!)

-Hermione (Same for above, especially that she is dating that my best friend.)

-Draco (Ew, please stop it with that! I am not gay, and even if I was, Draco would be the last man I'd ever do! We loathe each other!)

-Sirius (That's just gross.)

-Snape (I hate the guy, no matter how much people would think otherwise.)

-Dumbledore (Alright, and Dumbledore is actually gay but he has made no moves on me. Ever. Point taken.)

-Voldemort (Need...to...get...image...out...of...my...head...)

-And too many to list...

Thank you for your moment of attention.

Sincerely,

Harry Potter, the straight BOY who lived.


Haha. Hope you like it. :) I'm starting to do this mini series, so just ask for any particular idea. But anyways, we all know Harry is better off with Draco ;) Even if he does not agree to it.

Please review!