The class filed slowly and lethargically into their first period classroom, just after the bell sounded. It was a wonder that everybody happened to be on time that day. This class had two chronic tardy students, but it wasn't a mystery as to why. One of them served the police force, and it seemed that the criminals in town had a thing for causing trouble in the early hours of the morning. The other lived five hours away. At any rate, everybody sat down in their usual seats, tiredly pulling out their textbooks, trying to keep from thinking that the week had only just begun.
A horrible smell reached their noses, though, which caused the drowsy high schoolers to look up and actually open their eyes for a change. They all, especially a certain few, were taken aback at what they saw. A blue haired woman was lounging against a wall with a window cracked open and a cigarette in her hand. Her eyes were closed, but it was obvious who it was.
Suddenly it was pandemonium. Students were screaming her name and running trying to get to her, but she just smiled and shook her head. After so many years of being famous, she was used to all the fan love. The class's instructor took to the room and silenced the crowd. While she was a small aging woman, she instilled fear into the teenagers with her nonexistent temper and wild eyes.
"Sit down!" she commanded. Without missing a beat, the feral students backed away into their chairs. The teacher composed herself and took her own chair. "I see you have noticed our special guest today." The woman scowled as she turned to the "special guest". "PUT OUT THAT CIGARETTE! THIS IS A CLASSROOM!" The blue haired woman took one final drag out of the thing and then tossed it out the window into a puddle with surprising accuracy. The professor calmed herself again. "I believe she can speak for herself."
The blue haired woman took to the front of the class, taking a deep breath and opened her eyes for the first time since the students had arrived. "Hello," she started, "I am Bulma Briefs, as you all know." She smiled and gave a wink, a look that had graced the covers of magazines everywhere. "You might be thinking, 'Why is the beautiful and super intelligent Bulma Briefs in my classroom? All my dreams are coming true!' Well, I've got your answer right here." She clicked a button on a small metal pod and dropped it beside her. It exploded into a puff of smoke, and when it cleared, a stack of papers appeared. She dropped another capsule, this time a tiny robot came from behind the smoke.
The droid took the papers and began to pass them out at a great speed. "These papers are permission slips as well as insurance waivers and instructions. Take a look at the first page." The students did as they were told. "As you can see, this is a special project that is being conducted by my company, Capsule Corporation. Your class has been chosen randomly out of all the schools in the area to take part in this." The classroom started to buzz. The teacher glared again.
"SHUT UP WHILE MRS. BRIEFS IS TALKING!"
Immediate silence followed.
"Er, thank you." The teacher smiled kindly. "As I was saying, your class will be the only ones taking part in this experiment. Our planet has had some rather unfortunate events take place in the past fifteen or twenty years. Many of these occurrences could have ended with the death of many people and the destruction of the world as we know it. So, as the future generation of Earth, my company devised a way to see if you all are prepared enough to survive in a post-apocalyptic world."
"Yeah, like that would ever happen with Mr. Satan around," sniggered a disrespectful blond in the back of the room. The professor gave him a menacing scowl and he quieted himself.
"You will be taken to a remote island that hasn't been touched in around twelve years. Or, at least, until my team and I refitted it to mimic the ruins that may be Satan City after, say, Cell blew up most of the Earth. From there you will only have the clothes on your back, an empty storage capsule, and whatever survival instinct you may possess.
"Now, before you get all twitchy, if you are put into a position where it is sure you will die, such as from starvation, an animal attack, or disease, I will dispatch droids to go and get you and bring you to safety. This is simply a test. There is no reason to go all psycho and try to kill anyone. I want you to take these forms home to your parents. Look them over. Remember, this is a required study. You will be perfectly safe." Bulma gave another smile-wink combination. "I hope you're as excited for this as I am!" The class looked wary. "Any questions?"
Immediately a pale arm shot up. "Is it completely necessary for those of us who work for the police force to attend this? If there is an emergency-"
"Yes," interrupted the woman. "If you don't attend this study, our statistics will be thrown completely off. Besides, I'm especially curious to see just how well the daughter of the famed Hercule Satan fares in a simple test of survival."
"But if duty calls-"
"Then the police will take care of it. Don't worry, I'm sure I'll be able to find somebody to fill in for you if need be." Bulma stared off into space for a moment, murmuring, "I'm sure I can get Yamcha to do whatever I want still..."
The owner of the pale arm and awful attitude slumped back into her chair, utterly silenced. An unnamed student with glasses and an unfortunate haircut raised his hand. "Um, excuse me, Ms. Briefs, er, how long will this survival last?"
"As long as it has to," answered the genius vaguely. "This test will continue until there is just one person left who can take the heat of being on their own. It could even six months or longer. But for you... I'd say about three weeks tops." The bespectacled teenager gulped. "I suggest you take these home to your parents as soon as school lets out. You'll have one week from today to prepare for this." Once again, she flashed the smile-wink combo. "See you next Monday." She waved and walked out of the room, hastily pulling a fresh cigarette from her purse.
The Son home was relatively small. Maybe that's why the seven year old Goten was always found outside. Or maybe it was because it was in the middle of the lush 439 Mountain Area. Goten's older brother, Gohan, was just returning home from the fateful day at school, driving Goten mad. He loved his older brother.
"Gohan! Gohan! How was school?" he squealed. "Anything exciting happen? Don't say no because I'll know your lying cause Trunks told me his mom was gonna visit your class today to tell you about the experiment that she's gonna have your class do next week."
"Eh, yes, then," said the older brother, utterly perplexed at how Goten could talk to fast. "I've gotta go talk to mom, squirt, 'kay? I'll play with you later." He detached the boy from his shoulder and entered the dome-shaped house. Not surprisingly, his mother, Chi Chi, was waiting for him at the kitchen table.
"Gohan! How was school? Anything unusual happen today?"
Very tactful, mom, thought Gohan, rubbing his forehead. "Well, I got this permission slip-"
"Permission slip? For what, exactly?" Yes, his mother was well informed. "Is it by any chance for a survival project for Capsule Corporation?"
Gohan feinted surprise. "How'd you know, mom?"
"Oh, you know, news travels around... let me see this paper." She snatched it from his hands and began furiously reading it over, scribbling her name, checking off boxes, and filling in information. Gohan sighed.
"What an interesting experiment, huh, Videl?" said the ever bubbly Erasa. "Sounds super exciting." She frowned a bit, something she did not do very often because she wanted to prevent frown lines. "I don't know how I'll do, though. I bet you'll be the last one standing!"
"Yeah, yeah..." The raven-haired police worker was staring at the paper as the pair walked. "I wonder how Gohan'll do."
Erasa gasped. "You're concerned for him! How romantic!" She clasped her hands together and got starry-eyed.
"Shut it, Erasa. I'm not concerned, just curious. I mean, he can't even take a punch well, am I right? How'll he survive in post-apocalyptic Satan City with nothing but an empty capsule and those stupid orange pants?" Videl flipped a page of the form over. "It just seems to me like he'll be one of the first ones out of the project."
"Maybe. I believe in him, though! He's so smart, I'll be he knows just how to handle a situation like that!"
"Perhaps... but intellect can only get you so far, Erasa. What he really needs is physical stamina and mental toughness. I've heard that intelligent people tend to have high sanity levels, but anyone's bound be thrown off when they're thrust into a world that's destroyed by an evil android, right?"
"Yeah, I guess so. Then how do you think you'll do? You're smart and you've got physical stamina and mental whatever."
"I don't know how I'll do, Erasa. As much as I'd hate to admit it, this isn't a fight I can simply win by using my fists. I've genuinely got to prepare."
Erasa gasped again. The great Videl Satan, wary about her position? Scandalous!
The days in preparation for the survival experiment were tense. Most of the students had fallen silent. Even Sharpner and his huge ego were subdued a bit, yet he didn't refrain from calming himself with a few reassuring jabs at Gohan. "Hey, nerd-boy, I give you a day to live," he snickered. Gohan sighed for what seemed like the millionth time that day. Of course, he was sighing so much because Sharpner had been saying the same thing to him all day.
"I'll bet you do," was all the "nerd-boy" offered as a response. This made Sharpner profoundly angry, as his all his insults were ineffective. "I suggest that you spend less time mocking me and more time preparing yourself for the weeks to come."
"Ha! Like I need to prepare! I train everyday at the Satan Dojo! I'm hands down the strongest guy in this whole school! I could knock you over with a sneeze!" Gohan was slightly amused at how he said, "guy" and not "person". He supposed that even Sharpner and his ego that could fill up a football stadium couldn't even make himself think he was stronger than Videl.
"You're gonna need more than just brute strength to survive, Sharpner... idiot!" commented the girl in question. "It's gonna take wits to figure out how to live when you don't have any food or whatever. Especially if it's a bio-disaster that causes the apocalypse. I mean, anything could be contaminated, right? Stop being such a gas bag and use that brain of yours!" Videl poked him hard in the ribs.
Gohan suppressed a giggle. Sharpner's face, a mix of embarrassment and hurt, was absolutely priceless. Gohan only wished he'd had a camera on him to capture this moment for all posterity. Yes, he could see it now: Sharpner- the Face of Pathetic. His joy faded when he got down to Videl's words. Three days of their precious seven (including Monday), had already passed. They didn't have much time left. They literally had to think of all the possibilities. Famine? A bombing? Disease? Mutations? Destruction by an outside force such as Cell? The list was endless. The smile was wiped off of his face and Gohan went straight back to meditating.
Bulma Briefs was a close family friend to the Sons. Gohan had considered trying to get some information out of her or her son, Trunks. He was seriously thinking about using the latter, for Trunks was his brother's best friend. He could get all kinds of info about the conditions if he wanted to. No, he thought, I mustn't. I already have an unfair advantage! He nodded to himself righteously.
As the days wore on, things got more and more tense at Orange Star High School. All classes had been canceled for the training students, yet they were still required to attend the school for 'observation'. Bulma had installed a series of cameras, as well as dispatched a substantial amount of recording droids to watch them. She spent most of her day watching them, paying close attention to the top contenders. "Look like it's going to be close," said one of her assistants conversationally.
"Nonsense!" shouted Bulma's husband, a short man with a temper worse than the teacher and ridiculous strength to back it up. He was odd and pissed of at all times, so it was a wonder why the genius had married him, let alone have a child with him. "This is obviously going to be won by Kakarot's brat. I would expect nothing less. Surely he understands that he simply cannot lose out to a human!"
The assistant stared at Vegeta, half afraid, half confused. "What do you mean by that?"
"What do I mean? Are you serious?" He turned menacingly towards the assistant.
"Veggie, calm down," ordered Bulma as she lit up another cigarette. She took a long drag from it. Ah... nothing could soothe her stressed brain like a cigarette. "It's not a competition. Simply an exercise to see just how soft this generation has become."
The short man quieted himself, but he still glowered at the assistant.
The final days were not a blur like most of the class had hoped. They'd dragged on slowly and painfully, as if you mock them. With each day that was crossed off of the calender, it seemed like a personal "fuck you!" from the system. While some tried to pass this experiment off as just an exercise, the permission forms and insurance papers and the seriousness with which the instructions were written hinted otherwise. Furthermore, Bulma Briefs took her work very seriously, even if she was a celebrity who wouldn't be caught dead in secondhand jeans.
Finally, Sunday afternoon arrived. All the forms had been collected two nights earlier. There was literally no going back now. A jetcopter landed in front of each student's home, each one piloted by one of Bulma's employees. The one in the copter that landed in the 439 area house looked disgruntled. "I swear, I didn't even know people lived out here!" he grumbled. Gohan warily walked out of his home, followed by Chi Chi and Goten.
"C'mon, kid, hurry it up. We've got a long trip back," barked the anthropomorphic dog. Gohan did as he was told, for he was trained to do that, especially in Chi Chi's household, and it seemed to work out for him.
"Bye, Gohan!" squeaked his little brother, waving madly.
"Be careful, okay? Don't get yourself hurt! I'll be watching everyday!" called his mother as the jetcopter took off.
Watching? Wondered Gohan. Just what could that mean? Was she going to observe from Capsule Corporation with Bulma? He shrugged.
"Show 'em what you've got, Videl! You've got Satan blood in you! Don't you forget that!" yelled Hercule as his daughter flew away on her own jetcopter. She was a bit nervous, though she'd never admit it. She glared out the windshield of the copter, trying to figure out her destination. Were they going to go straight to the island, or were they going down to West City to meet with Bulma one more time? She sighed hotly.
As she flew, her jetcopter met up with the others. She was surprised to see Gohan's there, too. The anthropomorphic dog piloting the contraption looked utterly pissed off, so she figured he'd had to get up pretty damn early to make it to the 439 Mountain Area and back in time to catch up. Erasa was waving wildly at her best friend from her own copter. Videl smiled a bit and feebly waved back. After that, though, she put on her most determined face. I'm not weak, she thought to herself.
It was West City that they were taken to after all. They were brought into Capsule Corporation, but they weren't greeted with Bulma, but with her father. He had a cigarette in the corner of his mouth and a black cat perched on his shoulder. His hair was white and huge round glasses covered his eyes.
"Welcome to Capsule Corporation. Bulma's a bit busy with preparations for tomorrow, so I'll be your guide for now. You will all be taken to the dining hall for dinner and then you will each be assigned a room. You are to stay in that room for the remainder of the night. Tomorrow morning, you will all be taken to the island. Understand?"
There was a chorus of "Yup"s.
"Okay, then follow me!" Doctor Briefs smiled and waved for them to trail him. He walked slowly and talked animatedly about his work and the facilities. He would stop to explain and room or two, but nothing was very interesting to the tense students. "Oh, come on, now! Calm down! We're going to dinner!" Obviously the doctor didn't like being ignored. With no response, Doctor Briefs muttered to himself angrily.
"Are we ever going to get to dinner?" whined Sharpner. Gohan was wondering the very same thing. His stomach was completely empty. He hadn't eaten since nine that morning, and it was already five in the afternoon. He had an enormous appetite that eclipsed all of the rest of the student's combined. If he didn't get food fast, somebody wasn't going to have an arm anymore.
"Don't get your panties in a twist," squawked the doctor. "The dining room's right up here." He opened the door, revealing an almost dazzlingly white room filled with tables upon tables. Sadly, there was no food in sight. But, there were people. "Oh, don't mind the family." He was referring the short man with black flames for hair, otherwise known as Vegeta and the eight-year-old with lavender hair sitting at a counter with stacks of empty plates in front of them.
"Gohan!" squealed Trunks, the kid. He tried to run over to him, but his father grabbed the back of his shirt.
"Sit down, boy. Remember what your mother said," spat Vegeta. Trunks looked at his father's scowling face, and whatever expression he had on was a mystery because he was facing away from the students. "If there's anything we don't want, it's to anger her when she's like this, understand?"
"Yes, sir," nodded the child.
Videl turned to Erasa and whispered, "That's got to be some form of child abuse."
Before Erasa could respond, however, Vegeta was already up in Videl's face. "Excuse me? Are you opposed to my parenting methods?" Gohan closed his eyes in embarrassment and braced himself for what might come next. Please don't say anything back, Videl... he thought desperately.
"Yeah, I am. You shouldn't pick up your kid and yell at him like that," boldly stated Videl.
Damn it! Gohan sighed. He seemed to be doing that a lot lately.
"Oh, I'm sorry," said Vegeta very sarcastically. "Didn't your parents ever tell you about respecting your elders?"
"Yeah, they did, but I'm afraid that I can't respect those who abuse their children."
"And just who are your parents who have such a good way at looking at things. From my point of view, everything I'm doing here is perfect."
"Her dad's the amazing, the incredible, the unparalleled Hercule Satan!" piped in Sharpner. He even had poses to go along with the introduction that were even more ridiculous than those of the Great Saiyaman. The poses were so ridiculous that Sharpner could be first pick to join the Ginyu Force if they were still around.
"Oh, really?" sneered Vegeta.
Oh man, oh man, oh man! Thought Gohan. Sweat was pouring down his face. What am I gonna do? Shit, this is terrible!
"There's only one person that I hate more than that lying, cheating, worthless, stupid, weakling Hercule Satan. Just saying his name makes me want to vomit," growled the short man.
"Hey!" called out Gohan suddenly. "Why don't we all just calm down here a bit, okay? No need for anyone to get hurt, is there? Let's just sit down an eat, right? I mean, I'm not the only one who's starved, right? Come on, guys, let's just go pick a table." He laughed falsely after that.
Videl glowered at Vegeta one last time before following Gohan and the others to one of the glimmering white tables. "This isn't the last you've seen of me," she hissed at him before she left.
He just glared in response.
Food had come and gone, and the students were safely in there own rooms, free from any interference from the ever grouchy Vegeta. He had resigned himself to the specially designed gravity bending room to train... or rather, blow of some steam in his own special way. The noises from the room could be heard in only a few of the rooms, but they weren't loud enough for anyone to care about, so nobody bothered to ask about them.
Sharpner and a few of the other students had fallen asleep while the rest lay awake on their final night of being in a bed for quite some time. Sharpner was dreaming of tomorrow.
"Oh, Sharpner, you're so cool! Only you could have survived this long in this wasteland! Not even I, Videl Satan, daughter of the great Hercule Satan, could withstand being without food or water for as long as you have! You're my hero!" she melts into his arms, so vulnerable in her weakened state. "You're so much cooler than that nerd Gohan! He could only last two hours! What a wimp! What a loser! You're so much cooler, Sharpner!"
"I know, baby. Let's get going, shall we?" he smiles at Videl and picks her up.
"You're so strong!" she sighs.
He takes a running start and leaps into the sky, landing on the clouds. He sits on one with Videl next to him and they fly off into the sunset.
Sharpner rolled over in his sleep, snoring once and smiling.
