Tegan's POV
In the quiet dressing room I stare into a mirror. The crowd of fans are getting impatient for me to take the stage as they are screaming my name. Taking a deep breath I close my eyes and try to remember what made me choose this life on the road it wasn't the fame or the money; it was because I just wanted people to hear my music. Hearing the band start up I acknowledge it as my cue and the fact I have five minutes until I am needed on the stage; slipping my inner ear pieces in, I take one last look in the mirror before I exit my dressing room.
Making my way to the stage I run into several crew members who wish me luck; nearing the stage I spot my guitar sitting ready in the same spot it was when after I left the sound check earlier. Picking it up I slip the strap over my head as I make my way up to the mic. Looking out at the audience I wave to them before smiling and I say, "Hello Vancouver, are you ready to get things started?" The crowd response is full of enthusiasm as I strum the opening chords of The Con.
The rest of the show proceeds smoothly as there were no slip ups or mishaps; and, as it is one of the first shows we've done so well in a while perfectly the guys want to go out and celebrate a bit. For once I didn't see any chicks in the audience that I have any intention to bring back with me tonight for a good fuck; however, with that said it might be nice to not drink alone for a change so when they ask me to go out with them I agree. Taking two cabs over to a local night club Jasper slides into the cab beside me so we may share the fare.
"Hey Tee, things went really well tonight. Maybe things will start to turn around again?" Jasper says. I turn to look at him and give him a weak smile.
"Well I sure hope so. Otherwise the label will probably drop us, and right now I don't think anyone will be willing to pick us up," I reply to him.
Jasper sighs and rubs the back of his neck before looking out the window and says, "Well Tee, it is more than just the drop in sells. It's…well look I am not really sure how to say this, but it's the women and the alcohol. Look I'm not judging you, but your fans look up to you." The cab pulls up to the club but before Jasper opens the door I stop him.
"Look Jas, thanks for looking out for me and all, but you are not the first to give me this speech; and, I doubt you'll be the last. It isn't like I don't want a happily ever after. I just haven't met her yet," I say to him before we hop out of the cab to head towards the side entrance as past experiences have proven this is best to avoid the crowd of fans. Though lately that isn't much of a problem.
After settling into a private booth I spot a sexy brunette walking over to us. Long brown hair down to her back; and, nice firm looking tits at least as far as I can tell, she walks over to our table to take our drink order. Everyone orders a round of beers but I decide upon a double order of scotch, as soon as she is done taking our order I wink at her but she seems not to be into me. Leaning back I smirk to myself while she walks away and look over to see Jasper eyeing me. What a fucking buzz kill, I can have a little fun.
"Oh come on, Tegan, didn't we just have this conversation," Jasper says a bit sternly. The second the words come out of his mouth it seems like the guys know something I don'; and, the lack of eye contact from every one of them confirms my suspicions. Turning to me Ted places his arm around my shoulders.
"Here's the deal, when we get to Seattle there is going to be a meeting. I don't know the details but they have worked something out. Either you agree to their terms or it is all over with the label," Ted says weakly.
Instantly I am on my feet and I pace back and forth in front of the booth trying to keep cool. Clenching my fists I fight back the urge to punch something or someone. "When did they tell you this? How long have you known? Why are you telling me this now?!" I shout loud enough to be heard over the music.
"We were told to keep our mouths shut, okay?" Ted says loud enough for me to hear; and, apparently he is the mouthpiece of the group tonight. He continues, "They gave us a heads up in case you didn't comply with the deal they made; but, believe me when I say this Tee we really wanted to tell you right away. We were hoping they would eventually give us some details but nothing. You know we don't give a rat's ass about what you do in your private time. Tee, the label is getting tired of cleaning up your messes."
Following my outburst the waitress returns with our drinks, everyone shuts up as she places the pitcher of beer on the table followed by a bottle of Scotch and a glass. I guess my reputation precedes me and she leaves quietly as I pour my Scotch into the glass nearly filling it up completely; as soon as I sit the bottle on the table I grab my glass and drain half of it. This prompts me to say, "What the fuck do you mean clean up after me? What in the fuck is there to clean up? Yeah I drink but usually in the privacy of my hotel room and every girl I have fucked have been more than willing to come back to the hotel room with me. So once again I ask; what the fuck is there to clean up?
This time Jasper speaks up. "Tegan, those girls you take back to your room are fans, every single one. And word gets around, it may not be out in the mainstream media but your fans all know your type and they know you like to fuck. The label has gone as far as higher extra security to keep them from trying to slip backstage and into your hotel room. Plus your publicist, Jen, works over time making sure none of them talk to the media about what goes on in your room. They are tired of it Tegan, one of these days one of those girls are not going to be so willing at keeping her mouth shut. And then what, huh? Everything you have work so hard for will blow up in your face."
I slide back into the booth and rest my head in my hands; taking deep breaths I wonder just how long the label has been going behind my back like this. I deserve to know well at least I think I do. Placing his hand on my back Jasper begins to gently rub small circles and says, "Look we all know you weren't always like this, the first few years on the road must have been awfully fucking lonely for you to start bringing random girls back to your room, and I guess the label thought it was a phase or something but it's been seven years. Something's got to give."
It is a rare occasion that I let myself cry these days, but it seems I'm not drunk enough to suppress the tears. Fuck, why do I have to cry in front of everyone? I'm not so fucking weak am I? Leaning back I wipe the tears off my face before pouring myself another drink. "I'm sorry that I'm not the ideal musical inspiration that the label wants me to be, but everyone has their problems and you just have to find a way to deal."
Standing up Jasper reaches for my hand and says, "Come on lets head back to the hotel as you'll need a good night's rest before we head out tomorrow. You'll have to meet with the label and I am sure you will want to look your best." I know he is right so I chug the rest of my drink and place the glass down on the table.
"I'll take care of the bill," Ted says as we all head out.
We make it back to the hotel just after one and I forgo my nightly routine before bed. Considering tonight I'm not covered in some strange chick's slobber, sweat, and juices; I guess as shower isn't really needed. Fishing out some boxers and a large tee to sleep in I climb into the empty bed. Lying in the middle I try to remember what it is like to sleep totally alone; the girls I'd bring back always stayed until morning, granted they're usually sprawled out on their side of the bed passed out. After a few moments within my brain I fall asleep.
My phone's alarm wakes me and I crawl out of bed to move over to my suitcase to get some clothes. Tossing my outfit onto the bed I head to the bathroom to take a shower. As I am in no hurry I just stand under the spray and let the hot water run down my body, it is relaxing and my mind wanders to getting a massage. One of those deep tissue ones as I am sure it'd help with the tension. Noticing the water beginning to cool I quickly finish and step out of the shower.
Dressing quickly I check myself out in the mirror to make sure I look alright, following that I pack up my suitcase and pull on my leather jacket before leaving to head for the bus. Boarding I find the guys all sitting at the table just off of the kitchenette I move pass them to place my suitcase onto my bunk before turning to the guys. Something is up otherwise they wouldn't be sitting here all quiet. Leaning up against the door frame I say, "Well is someone going to tell me what the hell is going on?"
Ted decides to speak up, having more balls than the rest of them these days, "Remember how we told you the label and Jen work to make sure that nothing of what you do gets leaked?" I take a deep breath as I know where this is going. Ted continues, "Well TMZ somehow found out and they have photos of you and different women going into various hotels at night."
Sliding into the open seat next to Ted I say, "You have got to be fucking kidding me? How? Are they hiding in the goddamn bushes?" Ted opens his laptop sitting on the table and shows me the TMZ website he had cued up. "It says they got them from different fans. I guess they were staying at the same hotel those nights. Either way the point is they got out before Jen could work her magic. Now there is a media frenzy and they're digging for more. Sorry Tee, I told you this would happen."
Banging my head on the table I hope that maybe I am dreaming and I just need to wake up from this nightmare that is my life. Not wanting to hear anymore I stand up and make my way to my bunk. I can hear the guys one by one make their way off my bus and soon I am alone again. Pulling out my IPod I pick a random playlist and roll over to drift off to sleep again.
The trip to Seattle is quick and I settle into my hotel room before I catch a cab to take me over to the restaurant where I am supposed to go for the meeting. I suppose they thought it would be more pleasant to do this over a meal; after I give the hostess my name she walks me over to a table in the back which gives us a bit of privacy. The president and vice-president of the label sit at the table alongside Jen, my publicist, and Dawn, my agent, and I take the only empty seat left. When the waiter asks for my drink order I decide to be on my best behavior and just order some water.
The waiter returns with my water and we all place our food order; following this I have to suffer through thirty minutes of mindless chit-chat until the food is served. Jen is first to bring up the reason we are all there, "Well Tegan, I am sure you are aware of the recent leak" She looks over at me waiting to see my reaction. Sighing I run a hand through my hair.
"Yeah I hear. I am just wondering how exactly this happened and how are you going to fix it? I mean it is your job, right?
Jen arches an eyebrow and sets her glass on the table before replying, "My job is to generate press coverage and promote you. Not to clean up after you like I have been doing. Sorry Tegan but it is getting to be too much; the label and I have come to an understanding, as long as you continue down this path I won't work for you." I nod in understanding before looking over at Dawn as I am sure she has plenty to say. "
"Yes Tegan I do. First let's start with the drop in sells, we are thankful for your diehard fans, but that isn't enough to fill the venues and sell the amount of records we need to cover your advance. Your last record alone sold barely half of what we projected and it isn't looking good. Your sound is what makes you Tegan but have you ever thought about changing it up?" Dawn says and this grabs my attention. Change doesn't always equate to being bad.
"What do you have in mind exactly?" I ask as I shift in my seat and Dawn smiles weakly as it seems this is what she was looking for.
"I am sure you have heard of Sara Clement as she is from your home town. I even think you two might be the same age," Dawn says. They aren't planning what I think they are, they really can't be but I nod as Dawn continues, "Well she is also signed with us and we thought the two of you might collaborate a bit. To mix both of your sounds would be a great way to not only revive your fan base but to add to hers as well" Yes, she is fucking serious, I think to myself as I lean back in my chair and cross my arms. The last thing I need is some pop princess wannabe calling the shots.
"Are we talking a few songs or a whole fucking album? Will there be a tour? I need to know specifics before I even give this some thought," I reply and that venom comes out a bit more; but, Dawn is all smiles as I finish.
"Well I am glad you asked Tegan. In fact the answer is all of the above. The idea is that you both take time to work on your existing songs to find a common ground so you can play them together on stage. We will launch a tour to promote your collaboration during which you will put together a new album. Ideally there will be another tour for the new album," Dawn informs me.
"What does Sara have to say about this? I mean did you even talk to her about this? It affects her just as much as it does me," I say.
"She is thinking it over as we sat down with her this morning much like we are doing here and we talked things over with her manager Jason," Dawn quickly responds. I nod my head as at least Sara has some common sense to not rush into something huge like this.
"So how are we going to do this? I mean I am in Vancouver and she still lives in Montreal last I heard. Plus my tour still lasts six more weeks," I say,
"Arrangements will be made for the two of your to share an apartment. You will both have to agree on where and you will do so in the next six weeks. I suggest you take the time to get to know her, as for the public perception this will be a mutual collaboration," Dawn says as I look her in the eye.
"I have no choice in the matter right? I either do this or it's over?" I say as the venom has risen up to the forefront.
"Exactly! Now for the other issues; Tegan there will be no more women. I mean it and I know it seems unfair but it is for your own good. Besides once you and Sara start working together I am sure you will be too busy anyways," Dawn finishes with a smile before adding, "I am sure Sara will be on board." There is a part of me that wonders what the fuck that is supposed to mean.
Sara's POV
Tonight is the first, of hopefully many sold out arenas; unfortunately it is the end of my tour but I finally can say I have a sold out show. Sound check was fantastic following that it is time to relax a bit on my bus. My very own bus after ten years of touring I have my own bus. My career wasn't the way I originally dreamed as I didn't hit it big instantly; but, all the hard work and dedication has finally led to her. Over the years I slowly built up a fan base, a very loyal fan base at that.
Deciding to use my time wisely, and hoping for some inspiration, I pick up my guitar and proceed to strum out some notes. After twenty some odd minutes of aimless meandering on my guitar I finally give up and place it back on its stand; turning on the TV I surf through the channels until I find myself watching TMZ. Zoning out listening to them rant on and on about the latest stunt of some celebrity I could care less about until I familiar name strikes my attention.
Turning it up I proceed to listen to the show intently as the lead on the show points at some blonde guy before saying, "What do you got there?"
The man hesitates for a split second before he speaks, "Well we all know that Tegan Quin has never hidden the fact of her sexual preference, but what most people don't know is that it seems she sleeps with a different woman every night." The guy pulls out several photos of Tegan with different women trying to slip into different hotels unnoticed.
"Let's see those photos closer," The lead on the show says and the camera gets a closer look at the photos and it is apparent that this is Tegan Quin most definitely.
"Some fans were more than willing to share these with me," The unknown man says.
"Why is this the first time we are hearing about this?" The lead says looking confused before continuing, "It looks to me like her publicist isn't doing her job anymore." He hands the photos back to the blonde man and I immediately turn off the TV sitting there in shock. Could it be true? Well what else could it be? The photos are obviously of her. I've never been the type of person to randomly sleep with people on the road; not to say I haven't had relationships but never just a random fuck here and there. Do my band mates sleep around? Am I the only one who doesn't?
Realizing what time it is I quickly make my way to the back before getting dressed for the show in about half an hour. Making my way backstage I find my bandmates killing time talking about whatever strikes their interest; I half pay attention as I find a tall road case and I sit on top of it. Kevin notices my presence before nodding a hello while Todd simply gives me a two finger salute with Mike just smiling at me.
"What are you up to Sara Bear?" I hear a voice from behind as me. I turn my head to see Noah walking up to me. The thought from before crosses my mind and I cock my head.
"Can I ask you guys a personal question?" I say while everyone responds in the affirmative. "Great! So I happen to catch something on TV that made me start to think. You guys don't bring random women back to your rooms at night do you? I mean is it normal behavior?"
Mike looks at me with a funny expression, "Just what were you watching?" I roll my eyes at the insinuation.
"TMZ as I was surfing through the channels and well they were saying something about Tegan and how she has a different woman every night I have been touring for ten years and I have yet to know anyone who does that, and I was wondering if any of you did." I say as the guys gather around me as I spoke.
"Sara, I know you have a thing for her; well you don't even know her. So don't get bent out of shape over it, okay? Try not to read into shit like that," Kevin says as he steps forward and places his arm around me before continuing, "There is no telling when those pictures were taken or even if it is really her in them. Even if it is her well maybe she has a sex addiction or something. Who are we to judge?" He tries his best to hold back a smile and I grin before punching him in the arm.
Before I know it it's time to take the stage and the guys walk ahead of me while I follow as a stagehand hands me my guitar and I make my way to the center of the stage making sure I don't trip on any of the wires again. Reaching the microphone I adjust it a bit as they always seem to forget how short I truly am. Waving to the crowd I say, "Hey, so are you guy's excited about tonight's show?" The crowd goes wild and I giggle to myself as I wait for them to calm down. Still all smiles I continue fiddling with my guitar as I chat up the crowd. "So tonight's show is very important to me and the band, as not only is it the end of our first headline tour but it is also our first sold out show. So thank you all so very much for your support," I say as I fight back tears and I continue, "This…this is just well…you have no idea how excited I am. So let's start this show off right." I strike the opening chords of one of my favorite songs, Alligator.
The show comes to a close and I am hot, tired and ready to peel these clothes off and get clean before going to bed; plus I have a meeting with the label first thing in the morning. Thanking the crowd one last time before saying goodnight and I walk off the stage. After handing my guitar off to a backline tech I make my way out of the venue and grab my overnight bag, I never pass up a chance to stay in a hotel room as I can actually get a decent night's sleep. I spot the cab my personal assistant, Reina, arranged to pick me up and before I know it I am in front of the hotel, must not be far from the venue.
Deciding upon a nice bubble bath and a glass of wine I slide into the hot water of the tub and relax instantly. Reaching for my glass of wine I down it in seconds and immediately refill the glass. Time passes by as I stare at the bubbles on top of the water; I wiggle my toes before poking them out of the water. I should ask Reina where I can find an awesome salon for a pedicure. The ringing of my phone breaks me from my thoughts and I frown as I am pretty sure who would be calling me at this hour. Checking my caller ID it is Emy and I toss my phone to the plush rug as I know what she wants. It has been six months since she filed officially and two years since she walked out on me. I need more wine and before I know it I am three glasses deep and I find my thoughts wondering why someone like Tegan Quin would need the company of so many different women. She is talented, gorgeous, and I bet she is very smart as well. Oh what I would give to spend even a moment alone with her just to talk. After my fourth glass I start to feel really tipsy so I drain the tub and dry myself before making my way to the bed.
It's nine as I walk into the lobby and I give the receptionist my name. I move over to sit down in one of the overstuffed chairs, and within a few minutes Jason pokes his head out from behind a set of glass double doors and motions for me to follow him. Leading me to a huge conference room that could easily seat twenty, but there is just the three of us. He introduces me to a middle aged woman sitting on the left side of the table.
"Hello, Sara, my name is Dawn and I am Tegan's agent," Dawn says as we shake hands. She continues, "So Sara, Jason tells me you are quite the artist and things are really taking off for you." I smile and nod because I don't know how else to respond. "She's a sweetheart I can tell and hopefully she is just what Tegan needs," Dawn says while looking at Jason.
"Excuse me? I don't understand," I say a little confused but my interest is definitely peeked.
"Well Sara, Jason and I have been back and forth over a particular matter. I think you are a solution to a problem of mine," Dawn says as she turns to look at me. I give her a puzzled look while she continues, "It seems Tegan has hit a rough patch in her career and we have been looking into ways to boost it a bit. I hear that you are a big fan of hers, correct?" I try to stop from blushing and I simply nod. "Good, have you ever given any thought to collaborating with another artist?" She asks.
"Like for a few songs?" I say and I can see her hesitating.
"No…we are looking for extensive collaboration; ultimately what we want is for you to become a band. You could become Tegan and Sara. You'll rework your existing songs so that they can be sung as a duet live and eventually the two of you will write music together, do a few tours, and if it doesn't work out you can always go back to being solo." Dawn informs me.
I'm not dumb I know why they are doing this. Tegan is messing things up and the label wants me to be the band aid before it is too late. I chew on my thumb nail a bit, a nasty habit I have when I think too hard. The question here is do I want to get involved? Do I want to risk her dragging me down.
"Can I think about it?" I say and Dawns smiles.
"Sure! Take your time as Tegan has six more weeks on her tour," Dawn says. I stand up and leave in a daze. If this an opportunity of a lifetime or is it a one way ticket to hell?
