"Alright, Iwa-chan! I'm going to the grocery store. Don't mess with anythingwhile I'm gone!"
God damn it, Trashykawa. That was nearly two hours ago. Where the hell was that idiot, and what kind of host was he being by not even being around his guest? Fucking Shittykawa . . .
"'Don't mess with anything', my ass. I'm checking my email and shit." Iwaizumi muttered to himself, sauntering over to the bright pink exercise ball Oikawa used as a chair, "Fucking hell," Iwaizumi cursed, trying to sit in a way that helped him stay balanced. Before his frustration got too out of hand, he was able to solve his problem.
"'Oops, I did it again-'" The sudden noise made Iwaizumi jump and fall off the exercise ball that he worked so hard to sit on. He wondered if he even should get up, but the thought of Oikawa coming home and laughing at him for five years made him change his mind.
With a groan, Iwaizumi got up and looked for the source of the noise, realising that it was Oikawa's cellphone. He quickly picked it up and turned it off, throwing it onto the bed. Shittykawa told him that his phone was dead, so he had to borrow Iwaizumi's while he was out grocery shopping. Of course Assikawa was a filthy liar, and probably just took his phone so he could take pictures of random things, or worse, his face. Iwaizumi shivered at the thought of having to go through 100+ pictures of Oikawa's face and deleting them all. He had already been through that hell once.
Now, back to the task at hand. He turned around, sat on the exercise ball (with less difficulty this time), and pulled out Oikawa's laptop. It was decorated with puppy and volleyball stickers, and Iwaizumi briefly wondered how Oikawa was even considered a seventeen year-old.
Shaking off that thought, he opened the laptop and was greeted with the screen that asked for the password. Now, what was it again? Probably something stupid, like aliens. Another reason why Oikawa shouldn't be considered a young adult; he still likes aliens. Alienkawa. That nickname wasn't as clever as the others, though, and the idiot would probably enjoy it.
He typed in the word and groaned when the laptop accepted it. Of course Shittykawa would have aliens as his password.
Iwaizumi opened up Chrome and typed in the Web address to his email. After successfully logging in, he checked through his inbox and deleted all the spam and stuff that he wasn't in to.
After a long time of deleting, he got to a mail that was from Kageyama. Questioning how the hell Kageyama got his email address in the first place, he clicked on the message and read:
"Look at this."
There was a link below. He didn't know at first whether or not he should click on the link, but he ended up doing it anyways. Probably for shits and giggles if it turned out to be a gay porn website. He could blame it on Oikawa later. Yes, that's a great plan.
The site loaded up and some type of J-Pop song started playing. He muted the music and took a good look at the site.
"MY DREAM DATE" was written in bubbly cursive letters, and the options to play or go to settings were below. Behind the words were some poorly drawn flowers and a sun with sunglasses on. Iwaizumi resisted the urge to vomit as he stared at it.
He never expected Kageyama to be the type of person that was into these games. Though, Iwaizumi was kind of interested now. Why did Kageyama send him a link to this game? Was it some hardcore gore-fest that was disguised as a dating simulator? It was worth checking out. After all, if it turned out to be a dating simulator, he could just blame it on Oikawa (it was such a great plan!).
He clicked the button to begin the game and a loading screen popped up with dancing flowers. Once again, Iwaizumi had to resist the urge to throw up. Once the loading screen was completed, there was a text box that said, "CHOOSE YOUR DATE".
He went into the "Date Selection" category and immediately started a coughing fit once he saw the choices.
Turns out, there was only one choice. And it was fucking Trashykawa. Iwaizumi hesitantly clicked on Oikawa's name and the game generated a message that said, "Excellent choice!" He would blame this on Oikawa later. He could call him narcissistic! That was why he kept playing. Not because he wanted to go on an imaginary date with Oikawa. No, not at all.
"Ah, you must be new here! Let me show you around." The speech bubble for Oikawa said once Iwaizumi got into the actual game. Virtual Oikawa was a lot easier to deal with than real life Oikawa, who was just trash.
Iwaizumi worked so hard to get Virtual Oikawa to like him, and the time finally came. All of his hard work was finally going to be put to use.
"Oh? How indecent of me! I just got out of the shower." Oikawa's speech bubble drew the art for this game was terrible. If they were going to draw Oikawa shirtless, then they should have at least gotten their facts straight. Oikawa didn't have a six pack. He didn't have abs at all, actually. It was just a flat stomach. Not like he stared or anything.
"Iwa-chan, I'm ho-" Oikawa chose that moment to come home. Really? The moment where Iwaizumi was on Oikawa's laptop, with a picture of Oikawa's shirtless body pulled up on the screen? Really?
"It's not what it looks like, Shittykawa." Iwaizumi tried to make an excuse, but how the hell do you excuse that?
"Um, Iwa-chan. It looks like you looked up porn of me? I don't see how this can be anything else." Oikawa pointed at the screen from the doorway, his eyebrows furrowed together in confusion.
Iwaizumi shook his head, "No! Kageyama sent me a link and-"
"Tobio-chan?" Oikawa placed a hand to his heart and a horrified expression came onto his face, "So Tobio-chan and Iwa-chan are looking at porn of me?"
"No, Trashykawa! He sent me the link and I didn't know what it was, so I clicked on it, and it turned out to be some game-"
"Is that all you think this relationship is, Iwa-chan? A game?" Oikawa asked, obviously hurt.
"What relationship-"
Oikawa gasped, "I can't believe you! After all we've been through."
"What the hell are you talking-"
"I've given and given, but all you do is take! Do you even love me, Iwa-chan?"
"What-"
"Do you even love me, Hajime!?"
"Yes, Tooru! Of course, sure." Iwaizumi didn't realise what he said until it was too late. A horrified look came across his face as Oikawa winked with a grin.
"Yay! Iwa-chan loves me, Iwa-chan loves me." Oikawa sang as he skipped out of the room, leaving Iwaizumi to wonder what the fuck just happened.
