Hermione's POV

He looked so young and helpless lying on that hospital bed, that it was all I could do to stop from crying. He almost died today…he almost died and he would never have known how I really cared about him. A sharp pain went through my chest at the thought of losing Ron. Ron…the boy who was so frustrating, immature and insensitive, who was also the one person I couldn't live without. No Ron to sit up late in the common room with, no Ron to tick off for not doing his homework, no Ron to cheer on during quidditch matches…

He started muttering something incomprehensibly in his sleep then. I reached out and took hold of his clammy hand, hanging off the side of his bed. I looked down at it and realised he had dirt in his fingernails. I gave a somewhat half sob, half laugh and then the tears started flowing freely.

I only stopped when I heard a small voice.

"Hermione?"

His voice was still scratchy and sore, thought not as bad as when he had croaked "Er-my-nee" in his sleep earlier.

I lifted my head up.

"Ron?"

"Er…" He was looking down at his hand which I realised I was still clasping tightly. I dropped it like a hot potato and wiped my tears away.

"How are you feeling?" I asked quietly.

Ron was looking at me with a look that I couldn't read.

"Uh…My throat hurts a bit. Could you pass me that water?"

"Oh!" In my haste to pour him a glass of water from the jug on his bedside table, I knocked the teetering pile of gifts of Honeyduke's sweets onto the floor and I started wildly picking them up.

This is Ron, stupid, I thought to myself sharply. Why cant you stop acting like a complete idiot for two seconds and just talk to him, like you've done a thousand times before?

I passed him a glass.

"Thanks." He said and took a sip. He was strangely quiet too.

I sat there for a few minutes pretending to look at a card that the twins had brought Ron, which flashed different messages every two seconds.

I wonder how they do that, I thought, it must be some kind of charm. I'll…

"Hermione?" Ron said again.

"Yes?"

"How come you're not mad at me anymore?"

"Oh…um…" His question caught me off guard. Why wasn't I mad at him anymore? After all, he had agreed to go to a party with me, and then suddenly started being absolutely horrible to me and finally became attached to Lavender at the lips with no thought as to whether or not I'd get hurt. I know that we weren't together and I hadn't even told him I liked him but there was still an 'us'. He knew that. So why wasn't I mad at him? Then I thought of the way he shouted at Snape for insulting me and received a detention, the way he looked so lost before his very first Quidditch match and the way he vomited up slugs for me…

"I guess I missed having you as a friend."

That wasn't a lie. I missed having him as a friend, but I didn't want to be just friends.

He smiled at me, though his eyes still looked a little sad. I looked away embarrassedly and this time he took my hand and spoke in a tone of voice I had never heard before. It was desperate.

"Hermione. About Lavender…"

I pulled my hand away.

"I don't really want to talk about Lavender."

"It's not Lavender I care about."

I smiled and felt my face go vaguely pink.

"I know. Get some sleep Ron."

I turned to go and then thought differently.

"Ron?" He was already asleep and I could swear there was faint smile on his lips.