Between Your Life and Mine

Smallville

Pairing: Tess Mercer/Oliver Queen

Summary: Oliver wasn't that concerned at first. Tess going on a date wasn't something to worry about... until he realized too late that it was something to worry about.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.


When it first started Oliver really wasn't very concerned about it. Then again, he wasn't in a position to feel anything about it at all. The surprising interest he had was passed off as merely an interest in a friend's life. That was all it was because anything more would mean he was in trouble. And Oliver was too stubborn to admit that this could mean trouble for him.

So Tess going out on a date wasn't something to be concerned about. And it wasn't ... at first.

But that one date turned into a second date which then turned into a third. Before Oliver knew what had hit him the jealousy he felt induced heartbreak so painful that at times he thought he wouldn't be able to get up in the morning. He had to admit to himself that he was in too deep and had no way of getting out.

The next thing Oliver knew was Tess wore a ring on her left hand and she asked Lois to be her maid of honor. He watched as his former girlfriend prepared to marry another man. The pieces fell into place and he was powerless to stop it because who was he to stand in her way? He was the jealous ex-boyfriend that was still in love with another man's future wife, that's who.

He was the guy who realized too late exactly what he wanted.

Commitment had been the very thing he was running from when he ended their relationship all of those years ago because he had known back then she was the one woman he could love every day for the rest of his life. Oliver realized the very thing he had been afraid of for reasons he couldn't even remember was the very thing he would now give anything for.

Oliver wanted a life with Tess and it was the one thing he wasn't going to get.

So he sat in the pew of the small church next to Clark and watched the scenes play out in front of him.

He saw her walk down the aisle and wanted to be the one she was walking toward.

He saw her auburn hair fall into her eyes and wished he had been the one to tuck it back behind her ear.

He saw her smile and quietly whispered those three words to another man and was able to feel his heart break a little more.

When they asked if anyone had reason why this man and this woman should not be wed, Oliver wanted to stand up and scream at the top of his lungs all of the reasons why Tess shouldn't get married.

Reasons like how much he loved her or how much he missed her or how he would never make her regret giving him a second chance. Oliver wanted to tell her that he would never hurt her again and never let her go. Oliver wanted to say he knew that deep down she loved him just as much as he did her; he wanted to say there wasn't anything they couldn't overcome if they simply tried.

He wanted to say all of these things but he never opened his mouth.

The thing was that Oliver didn't really know what to do with himself.

How could he be watching Tess get married?

A part of him was still in denial because Tess had always been the person that could understand him, what he was thinking or feeling with a simple look. She was the person that had saved his life in more ways than one and had become a part of him in the process.

Tess could make him laugh or cry from a multitude of emotions and sometimes he suspected that he hated her. He hated her because she made him fall in love with her so thoroughly that he never had thought they would end.

She always came back into his life somehow. And it just proved to him that greater forces were at work to bring them together. For Christ's sake they had met on a deserted island in the middle of nowhere… if that wasn't fate then it what else was?

Actually, if something proved that fate did not exist it was the moment that Tess said "I do" to another man while he looked on like any other invited guest that was supposed to be happy and rejoice.

And a part of him was happy… for her. He had always wanted her to have a man that would love her unconditionally, make her happy, and treat her the way she deserved.

But it was him. And it was supposed to be him and her.

Instead, she stood before him now as another man's wife with a smile on her face without a shadow of doubt in her gaze. He was overcome by the heartbreak so hard it made him sick to his stomach. He hung his head to wonder where they went wrong, what he could have done, which moment it was that he missed that could have changed all of this.

Oliver couldn't bear to look as the new husband and wife walked down the aisle toward their future. His mind ran through all of the moments they would never have now and all of the moments that he would always miss so he just kept his eyes downcast and never looked up at her.

If he had stolen one glance then maybe he would have seen the look of regret and sadness that flashed in the eyes of the bride as her gaze settled briefly on him in the crowd. But it was gone so quick that maybe he wouldn't have seen it at all and maybe, that was for the best of all the hearts involved.

And as the look disappeared she moved forward with her husband.

So instead, Oliver sat there thinking that Tess wasn't the one that got away as some may suggest.

No, she wasn't the one that got away. Tess was the one he let walk away and that maybe was what hurt the most. Not that she married another man but that it was his fault in the first place.


End.

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