Title: Love Lost

Summary: Meredith died and now Derek is taking care of their three year old daughter Lindsey. He goes back to Seattle the first time in five years to have help from the old interns. They haven't really spoken since Meredith had Lindsey. How will Meredith's death affect all of them?

Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy or anything.

Authors Note: I love Meredith and Derek together but I came up with this idea. It is different then what I usually write but I thought I would write in anyway.

Beginning of the End

It was late when the phone woke Derek from his slumber. He felt around in the bed for Meredith and couldn't find her thinking she probably had an emergency surgery not uncommon for her to be late. He answered the phone hoping to get it before waking up Lindsey.

"Hello Dr. Derek Shepherd speaking." He answered groggily.

"Hi Dr. Shepherd I am calling from Manahatten General we brought your wife in for injuries resulting from a car accident. I think you should get down here right away it doesn't look good." Said the monotone voice at the other end of the phone. He at multiple times in his life had made a similar phone call to his patients' families but never felt the pain of those four little words it doesn't look good.

Derek quickly threw on a pair of dark jeans and his red dress shirt. He went into Lindsey's room and grabbed her and her favorite purple knitted blanket that Izzie sent them when she was born. He grabbed a bag of toys and food for Lindsey and rushed out the door. In the car on the way there he called Addison Sloan. She married Mark two years ago Derek and Meredith were in the wedding. Addison and Meredith surprisingly had a lot in common and Mark and Derek made up. Addison was Meredith's OBGYN. Derek and Meredith trusted the life of their unborn son in her hands.

GA

Derek was pacing back and forth in the waiting room. He wasn't told anything he was just asked for his signature to have emergency surgery performed on his wife. Lindsey was being watched by one of his friends, Bret, who worked there and was on call when Meredith came in.

Two minutes passed since Derek started pacing when Addison and Mark came running into the waiting room. Upon seeing Mark and Addison enter the room he walked to the entrance of the room and stopped pacing.

"How is Meredith?" Mark asked panting finally catching his breathe some what from running all the way to the hospital from the car.

"I don't know they didn't let me see her. I was just told it doesn't look good and had to sign some consent forms. I don't like being on the other side as the family of the patient relying on the doctors to save my wife." Derek started pacing in the room again. "Addison, can you check on her and see how John is doing? You have to save my son I trust you. My wife is in another doctor's hands but I want my son in your hands." Derek started pacing again you would have thought he was going to wear the carpet thin with the number of times he walked back and forth in a short period of time.

GA

Addison left the room and went to change into her scrubs. She rushed to get to the OR and scrub in for the surgery. From the looks of the faces and the tension she felt upon entering the room the surgery wasn't going well. Addison recognized Dr. Meloni a Neuro surgeon operating on her head. Her head appeared to be the only damage. Addison was told by one of the nurses that the surgery would be over in less than an hour and the baby was fine going into the surgery. The last thing she heard before exiting the OR was "There is too much damage in here. She will never wake up." Addison had tears in her eyes as she scrubbed out of the surgery. She knew her best friend wasn't going to make it at that point but didn't know what to tell Derek or Lindsey.

GA

The tears were still present in Addison's eyes as she walked back into the waiting area which now had all of Derek's sisters and his parents.

"Any news?" Derek asks quietly. His eyes were pleading for her to tell him good news.

"The baby was still alive going into the surgery. I am going to check on him when she gets out of surgery. From the looks of it only her head was getting operated on besides some bruises and cuts she looked good." Addison said not wanting to say what she over heard but also not wanting to give him false hope.

"Can John survive outside of Meredith's body?" Diana, Derek's mother, asked Addison scared of losing her only daughter in-law and the soon to be newest addition to the Shepherd family.

"If he didn't receive any extensive problems John will have a chance at living." Addison said looking down at her hands. She couldn't look them in the face and say that John Robert Shepherd probably won't survive along with his mother.

GA

Dr. Meloni entered the now crowded waiting room. Every one of Mer and Derek's friends from the hospital were waiting for an update on her condition.

"Um…Can I speak with Derek Shepherd alone?" Most of their friends from the hospital leave. Only Addison, Mark, and Derek's family is left in the room. "We tried everything we could to save her. We did a relatively new procedure. I am sorry but she was declared brain dead ten minutes ago. She is still hooked up to the monitors so you can say good bye. We are also wondering if you would like to donate her organs." Derek's family just sat there quietly crying. Mark walked over and pulled Derek into a hug. Addison had tears streaming down her face and was the first to regain her voice.

"Is the baby still alive?" The doctor couldn't meet Addison's eyes as he shook his head no. It was then she heard Derek sobbing. This would be the hardest thing Derek and Lindsey would have to go through in there lives.