Summary: The author is your average (maybe hard-core) Roxas fangirl. Her mission today: spread the Roxas fever to all girls. A silly oneshot after I found out that there aren't any Roxas fan clubs.


Author's Notes!: Hiya! I'm feeling stupid. So...ta-daaaah! You get the dumbest oneshot I have actually resolved to write!


It was some random, ordinary school day. LILMISSS, or Charis for normal terms (okay, when was she ever NORMAL...?) had just arrived at school. Her mission today: spread the Roxas fever to all girls.

Well...normally her missions were quite stupid, ranging from "promote Ash and May from Pokemon" to "make sure Kishon gets owned by air". But this time, she was dead serious about it. We're talking about ROXAS here. You know, the incredibly hot guy with cute bright azure sapphire eyes, gravity-defying blonde hair, a very cute pout, a somewhat cool, collected character (omg, don't you just LOVE guys who are calm?!)...

And he can wield not one, but TWO keyblades. That, my dear readers, is awesome.

ANYWAY! She walked into her classroom, and saw some people vandalising the whiteboard with not-so-awesome faces, waffles, thoughts of waffles (that made her squirm a little), and Bidoofs from Pokemon.

"Give. me. the. friggin. marker." she hissed at some random guy, snatching it hastily. And then, her tyranny of insanity began.

In a span of five minutes and utter silence from the class who had never seen the girl THIS insane, "I LOVE ROXAS (lots of hearts inserted here) HE'S SO HOOOOT AND HELL YEAH, HE'S AWESOME" was soon scribbled on the board. Accompanying it was "AKUROOOOOOOOKU!" and "SORA ISH GH3Y!"

So...the entire whiteboard was KH-based.

"...You're friggin INSANE, lady!" Kishon randomly yelled, but LILMISSS decided to ignore him. She'll own him in something stupid later.


"What's a ROXAS?" one asked curiously. Instantly, LILMISSS flared up in anger.

"...ROXAS. He's a HE. NOT AN 'IT', YOU UNGRATEFUL BASTAAAAAAARD!" Soon, thoughts of hatred for that guy filled her mind.

"...Okay..."

Huff.


And then...lesson time.

As the teacher droned on monotonously (that was ALOT of 'O's there...), Charis found herself in a strange predicament.

Well, it was rather normal to her.

"But Roxas is a hot blonde with cute eyes!"

"Charis, stop obssessing about Roxas, for goodness sake!" a guy hissed next to her.

"Ichimaru Gin from Bleach is cuter and much better than your (CENSORED!) Roxas. He sucks (CENSORED!) and he basically sucks." her friend argued, holding up a picture of Ginny Boy (that was what she called him)

"...Roxas is still hotter."

"HE HAS WHITE HAIR!" The 'Ginny boy' fangirl retorted.

"ROXAS IS BLONDE!" Charis nearly screamed back.

"SHUT UP ABOUT ROXAS ALREADY!" Another girl yelled. Because of Charis, she retired from being a Roxas fangirl. It was ALL because Charis started pissing her off by randomly saying in her face "ROXAS!". Now, she's a hard-core Glambert fan.

"ZEXION OWNS!" the waffle dude yelled randomly, in front of the whole class. The pathetic nerd then decided not to fantasise about Zexion anymore. Sinking into his seat, he decided to leer at the girl next to him, but the OTHER guy next to that girl saw it and got traumatised for life.

"You're gh3y." Kishon decided to say, and the class resumed its quiet chattering, while the teacher was still blissfully unaware of the Roxas War.

Charis brought her finger up to silence everyone with something related to Roxas, but then she saw everyone (aside from the teacher) glaring at her, so she shut up, looking rather depressed.

"No one likes Roxas..."

The Ginny Boy fangirl grinned. "That's because it's you supporting him."

"...Damn you."


On that day, there was a huge charitable bazaar (Charis ALMOST stole the money her class made, and she tried to save 10 cents to no avail. Shit) and everyone soon headed down to bask in enjoyment (oh, and dunking teachers for a small fee)

Charis dragged her friends, which included Ginny Boy fangirl (J), Glambert fangirl (A), Orange maniac (H) and green maniac (N) to the hair dye stall.

"I'm gonna dye my hair blonde like Roxas!" Charis announced eagerly, as she handed up the money.

"I'm gonna sit here and eat my cup noodles." J. muttered, as she settled down to slurp the noodles.

"I'm gonna dye my hair red!" A. announced, "like Allison from American Idol!"

"...Okay..."

So, Charis nervously approached her hair dyers (who were somewhat her enemy; they teased her right there) and asked for blonde.

"I would like my hair to be blonde like Roxas!" Charis proudly told them.

"Er...two things. One, we don't HAVE blonde. Just yellow and gold. And two, who the HELL is Roxas?"

Charis looked at them like they had just escaped from rehab.

"I want gold. And..."


"Thanks for the free hair session, Charis!" A. chirped merrily as she petted her not-so red hair happily. She felt like an Idol now!

"A. , PLEASE, Charis freaking PISSED the guys out with her Roxas rant." J. muttered, finishing the last bit of her cup noodles, "and they shut her up by giving you guys free."

Charis looked at the two of them, and she grinned. "Well, now people know all they need to know about Roxas!"

"...Riiiiight. Anyway, let's head back to our class song dedication booth. Someone's screwing it up with our choir singing being blared out into the speakers." With that, the trio quickly headed to the booth, where, true enough, screechy voices were heard from the speakers, and almost everyone nearby were screaming "STOP THAT SOOOONG!" except for the guy who dedicated it "to all people, enjoy the song!"

"OKAY I SHALL DONATE TWO FREAKING DOLLARS TO CHARITY SO THAT THEY CAN PLAY ROXAS' THEME SONG WHICH GIN OR JIN OR WHATEVER DOESN'T HAVE!" Charis yelled through the horrifyingly scary music, as she quickly penned down "The Other Promise - Yoko Shimura" and then, in bracket next to it, "it's teh Roxas theme song!"

When the singing was over, the DJ took over. "Err...now we have 'The Other Promise' which is by Yoko whatever, and it's..." he paused for a moment, stared at Charis who gave him a huge grin and two thumbs-up, before continuing, "Roxas' BLOODY theme song. It's to all ROXAS fangirls. And it's from the most freakishly hard-core Roxas fangirl EVER to exist in sch- no, in the entire freakish WORLD."

At that mention, Charis squealed, jumped up and down on the spot, attracted alot of attention, stared at everyone and then sat down, while murmurs of "Ro-WHAT...?" and other mixed reactions other than fangirl-style reaction occurred.


And since that day was a Saturday, her entire family headed to a Japanese restaurant for dinner.

"You know," Charis muttered to her sister, "these lobsters are rather pitiful. I mean, they actually get to WATCH their dear friend get chopped up in half! It's like...looking at your friend being cut up into half by some random giant lobster or something!"

The family at the side squirmed, and as the conversation got more sadistic, they quietly exited the area.

Anyway. Charis was flipping the menu for something good (to her, good usually meant Roxas-related) to eat, when she caught a glimpse of something blue.

"Hoooooooly shit," she gasped, almost dropping the menu, for in that very menu, in that very restaurant, in that very second...

...There it was. Sea-salt ice cream. Roxas' favourite (heck, his only) dessert.

"MUM I NEED THIS AND I NEED THIRTY SCOOPS."


"It's sweet...and salty!" Charis exclaimed, for the...er, they lost count. "No WONDER Roxas likes this!"

"...That's your 60th scoop, sweetie."

"And...?"

"Er, nothing. Ditch your ice cream, just ditch it. Go play Kingdom Hearts or something, I DON'T CARE JUST FREAKING GET RID OF THE ICE CREAM!!"


So, the entire family was seated on the floor, while Charis took dibs on the sofa with her glasses on.

"Why wear glasses?"

"Er...I wanna see every minute detail of Roxas..? DUUH." Charis pointed out, as though it was the most obvious thing in the world next to "Roxas is hotter than everyone else here in the freaking universe".

"Okay."

Charis (or more specifically, Sora) was in The World that Never Was, and she was going to 'own Xemnas like shit 'cause he has no right to govern Roxas', according to the girl.

She raced down the corridors of white, and then as Sora and friends approached Xemnas, Charis randomly yelled, "C'MON, GET TO THE ROXAS CUTSCENE ALREADY!"

Xemnas was still babbling about his freaking Kingdom Hearts, Sora owned him verbally (or maybe it was the other way...) and fights ensued...

Until the Roxas cutscene.

"KYAAAAAA! ROXASOMGHE'STHERERIGHTTHERELOOKINGATUSYAYAYAYAYYYYYY!" Charis started hyperventilating like crazy, and her cold didn't help. The scene was kinda stupid: Charis hyperventilating and screaming for a few seconds, and then a sudden stop to breathe deeply and to blow her nose, and then...the cycle continued along those lines.

The cutscene lasted for...less than a minute. When Roxas snapped at Sora, "Heeey, look sharp!", Charis nearly fainted from lack of breath and sheer fangirlism.

After that, the majorly annoying fights started, and Charis was screaming and button-mashing, "DIEEEEEE I SHALL SEE ROXAS FOR ONE LAST TIME IN THIS GAAAAAAME!"

But she never did. For that day.


Mission completed. Tomorrow, she may spread "Sora is gh3y" to everyone. Maybe.


I...liked writing this! (: