This is my first Simpsons story so please go easy. It's all in Lisa's POV. Also, I don't have spell check so I'm sorry for spelling mistakes and typos that I might have overlooked. I hope you like it.
Summary: Lisa reflects on all the different aspects of her life and how it would affect her if they were different
Disclaimer: Sadly, I am not the genius behind The Simpsons so it, its characters and the episodes mentioned in this short story do not belong to me.
What If?
The air was chilly but I decided to walk home instead of taking the school bus. I'd had a bad day at school and when that happens I usually end up thinking of everything wrong with my life and that often includes my family. I wanted to take longer getting home so I could stay away from them for a bit.
I didn't usually have bad days at school that didn't mean they never happened. Today, Nelson and his gang of horrible, cowardly cronies stole my saxaphone and hid it in the boys toilets. I had to get Bart to get it back for me because there was no way I was going in there. I was right to think that too because Nelson had also placed a bucket of ice cold water above the door so it fell on Bart's head when he went in and he got soaked. Then he chased me round for ten minutes, certain that I had known the bucket was there and that was why I'd sent him instead of going in myself.
We had gym today too; dodgeball. I'm not bad at dodgeball but everyone is likely to get hit aren't they? And those balls are hard. I got hit right on the nose and it bled for fifteen minutes. It's still sore now and my head aches and there's blood on my dress. My mam won't be pleased.
There was a food fight at lunch time- started by Bart of course- and although I take no pleasure in such childish trivia, I still got coated in spaghetti, gravy, custard and yoghurt. More stains to match the blood on my dress. Bart had gotten sent to the principal's office so he'll probably have to explain to mam and dad why he's got a weeks worth of detentions along with a couple more F grades on his test papers. And I couldn't help but wonder, what if Bart took school seriously? What if he actually tried? what if Bart was more intelligent? It would help me a great deal. He wouldn't always ruin my science projects or place me with the burden of knowing he was cheating in his tests or skipping school, because if anyone found out I knew, I'd get in trouble for not telling on him.
If Bart took life a bit more seriously, mam and dad would probably be a bit more relaxed. Dad wouldn't always be shouting at him (or trying to throttle him) and mam wouldn't always be pulling that face. That face that says "I'm so disappointed" and seems to be permanently stuck to her face, making it ugly when mam is really quite pretty. I bet dad wouldn't stress as much. Like that time we went to Kamp Krusty and he was a really good shape (for him anyway) because he didn't have us around. Dad could be loads healthier if Bart just tried a little harder in school.
What if? Two words to start a sentance that has a thousand possible endings. Like, what if mam had a job? We would have a lot more money. We're not poor, we can afford the cost of living, but we don't have much money for luxuries, what with there being five of us, a cat and a dog in the house. If we had more money, maybe we could move to a better town. One that isn't populated by weirdos like Ralph Wiggum and we're the police are actually good at their jobs. One where you haven't got to check the use by dates on everything you buy from the stores to make sure they haven't been altered. Where school teachers have been properly trained and don't need to rely on their stupid Teacher's Edition for answers and where you didn't have to pray for your life whenever you got on the schoolbus. Maybe, one where the whole town doesn't smell of something that has gone sour and left to rot in a warm room, and you have to smell it everytime you go into that room. Sure, you can stay in that room and get used to the smell, but when you leave and smell clean air and then go back to that room, there it is again. I blame that powerplant.
And speaking of the powerplant, what if it was run properly, by educated men who knew what they were doing? I mean no offense to dad but it's true. All he does is sit around eating doughnuts or sleeping when he's supposed to be the safety inspector.
That powerplant has polluted the town because of its employees shoddy work and the fact that Mr Burns has all the waste buried in the parks and dumped in the lake. The effects are finally starting to get noticed as well, since Bart caught the three-eyed fish. The one thing he's ever done right.
What if dad was cleverer? What if he had a college education and could do his job properly. He could get promoted to a higher position, one that has a better career prospect. He probably wouldn't eat as much because he'd more aware of the damage he was doing to his body and he'd be able to help his own children when they're having problems instead of leaving it up to mam to sort everything out.
A lorry rolled past me and the draft trailing after it made me shiver. I smelled the exhaust fumes and thought of all the pollution in this town. There's pollution in every town, I know that. You can't avoid it. But our town has the most pollution and that's been proven and it's all because of that nuclear power plant. They can have as many surprise inspections as they want, but it'll never change anything. Sometimes I really do hate this town.
I rubbed my aching nose, once more feeling relieved that it wasn't broken, but I winced slightly at the sting of pain. The schoolbus had passed me ages ago and I saw Bart making faces at me out of the back window. He's so immature. I hate him... No, that's not fair. He's my brother. He really annoys me and all he ever thinks about is himself but I suppose you can't really hate your siblings no matter how hard you try. We have a laugh sometimes I suppose. But I can't wait until Maggie gets a bit older and finally learns how to talk and we can play with our dolls together. I like Maggie. She doesn't cause much trouble (although she is a bit wierd, like her hatred for that baby with the one eyebrow, and how she hit dad on the head with a mallet) but sometimes she does annoy me as well because- being the youngest- she gets a lot more attention than me. And usually attention wouldn't bother me too much, except she's only a baby so she needs attention and Bart gets a lot of attention because he's always getting in trouble so it doesn't really leave much for me. I'm just the middle child who sits quietly in her room and does her homework. I get straight As all the time but no one cares anymore. They'd probably care more if I got poor grades. So, what if I was an only child? Just me, mam, dad, Snowball II and Santa's Little Helper. Would I like that? Probably, yes. Although, come to think of it, we wouldn't have the dog if it wasn't for Bart. I'm not sure dad would have brought him home if Bart hadn't of asked. Still, I wouldn't know any different if I was an only child would I? I'd probably wish for siblings to play with them. It's a common fact- the human race is never satisfied. We complain when it's too hot and we complain when it's too cold. We complain when we want our own space and we complain when we want company. We're a selfish race.
The dull throb in my head was beginning to ease. Dark clouds were rolling across the sky, blotting out the sun and threatening rain. I sighed. I felt sad again. I just wanted my saxaphone. My saxaphone and Bleeding Gums Murphy so we could jam together again. You see? There I go. Complaining. Just like everyone else. And why not? I'm no better than anyone else.
What if people were all generally good natured? What if there was no Nelson Muntz, no Snake, Fat Tony, Sideshow Bob or Mr Burns. Everyone would be good like the Flanders or...who else in this town is kind hearted? No one I can think of. That just proves my point. People can be kind, I'm not saying no one ever is, but a lot of them want something in return, or they do so something bad to someone else. What's the point of life, I ask you?
The first drops of rain began to patter lightly on the dirty, chewing gum and litter covered pavement. I held my school books closer to my chest to try and keep them as dry as possible, but I did not quicken my step. I carried on with my train of thought, but it took an interesting turn. I thought back to the food fight at lunch time and Bart's constant Fs on exams. What if Bart was more mature? I started to think selfishly like I've mentioned a lot of people do. If Bart was cleverer I'd get even less attention. Although my high grades are normal now, they'd seen even less outstanding if Bart achieved the same grades, wouldn't they? Mam and dad would get a lot of praise for raising such brilliant children, but I, personally, would get get less. Maybe it's a good thing that Bart is the way he is. I suppose we can have a laugh sometimes, which we might not do if he was a little child prodigy or something. Like when we prank call Moe. I've never done it myself but it's funny to listen when Bart does it.
And suddenly I'm questioning my own questions. So, what if mam had a job? Sure, a lot more income and a lot more toys and sweets but then we'd never see her probably. Mam's always at home and although it's probably not as fun for her, it's natural to us. It's odd when mam is out. And plus, we'd always need babysitters if both of our parents worked all day. And like I said, we weren't exactly short of money. As for living in Springfield. So, yeah, there's a alot of bad people here, plus a police force that can't do their jobs properly and it stinks! But it's home. It's all I've ever known. It's my world. I don't exactly have many friends but I know everyone here. I know who I can trust and who I can't. I know where it's safe and where it isn't. I'd be lost if we moved away. The smell I've dealt with eight years, I can put up with it. The schools? They could be better I guess. But it's not like I'm not learning anything, even if the teachers need books to answer their own questions. All I have to do is walk to anf from school everyday to avoid the schoolbus and hope Principal Skinner never gets his beloved magnets. Oh, and avoid the bullies much as possible. They only prey on me when there's no one else around though. Today I was just unlucky.
One day someone will do something about the powerplant I'm sure. I'm contradicting myself but now that I think about it, someone could shut it down. They'd just have to be string enough to avoid Mr Burn's bribing and a guilt for putting so many people out of a job. Dad would get another one though, I'm sure. Either that or he'd get training so he could do his job properly and then actually do it. If he did his job properly he'd have less time to eat so much so that'd be good for him. I made a mental note to persuade dad to really try and work. I'm positive I can do something to make him. The powerplant pollution would get sorted out eventually even if the plant didn't get shut down. I'm confident on that.
The rain was coming down a lot heavier now and my books were getting wet despite the protection I was trying to give them. Mrs Hoover wouldn't be please but it couldn't be helped. I was starting to think longingly of home now. Where it was warm and dry and mam would cook us all dinner and we'd sit at the table and shovel it down our throats like the animals we are. And what better way is there to enjoy a family meal?
No, Maggie. I'm still going to hope that she will learn to talk quite soon and then we can play together. Maggie's already ridiculously clever as it is and I'm probably the only one who's noticed. Maybe she doesn't get as much attention as I made out. But I think I'll get on a lot better with Maggie than I do with Bart. Plus there's the fact that we're both girls. I already like just sitting with Maggie sometimes. She's so cute. I'm glad she's my sister.
I was only two blocks away from my own street now and I was grateful. The chill was getting to me now and I wanted to get chaged out of my wet, stained dress and have a nice bath to ease away the sorrows of a bad day at school.
So, last but not least, before I reached my house, do I really want everyone to be nice? If everyone was kind there'd be nothing special about anyone and we wouldn't even know that being nice existed because there'd be nothing to contrast with it. We could do with a few less criminals like Snake, Fat Tony and Sideshow Bob but there's nothing we can do about that. And if I think even deeper into the matter if everyone was like Ned Flanders we'd all become doormats. Ned Flanders is too kind for own good. An example of that is how he always loans his belongings to my father even though he must known by now that he'll never see them again.
The rain was coming down harder than ever and I was soaked to the bone. That bath had never seemed more appealing. I rounded a corner and turned into my street. I could see my house just down the road, the living room and kitchen lights on and it seemed to glow with warmth. How could I ever hate my family? They were annoying sometimes but they were always there when I needed them, one way or another. My pace quickened and I approached the path leading to the front door. I paused and looked through the living room window. I could see mam's "I'm so disappointed" face and dad looked angry so I knew Bart was telling them about his grades and detentions.
Something brushed against my leg and I looked down and saw snowball, rubbing herself against me.
"Go inside Snowball," I said. "You'll get soaked!" She just looked at me with her green eyes. Then she stalked down the path, her sopping tail held high and climbed through the catflap. I looked back through the window and laughed as I saw dad chasing Bart around the living room as mam watched with a stern expression on her face and her hands on her hips and she told them both off.
I though of all those "What if"s, shook my head and smiled. I liked everything just the way it was. I followed Snowball down the path and entered the warm, dry safety of my wild but loving home.
I hope you enjoyed it. Please review and let me know what you think.
