(A/N: A Very Vampy Holiday was inspired by the amazing artwork of katiemarie1999!)
Simon slowly inched towards the sleeping couple, a permanent marker resting in his hands. He prayed and prayed that they wouldn't wake up because Jace would surely eat him alive. He could hear the music from Psycho, like a constant soundtrack in his head. With each slow careful step, he got closer and closer and -
"Simon!" Isabelle groaned. Simon nearly jumped out of his skin and raced back to his seat, trying to look completely innocent. He peered at both of them from the corner of his eye, only to see Jace stir and snuggle even closer to Clary.
He let out a sigh of relief and shot a harsh look to his girlfriend. "Shhh! I was almost busted!"
"Do you like the tree?" Magnus bellowed, gesturing to his work. The green pine tree shimmered with shining flickering lights and ornaments gleaming so bright they could blind you. Raziel the angel rested on the top of it (a suggestion from Alec) and, to top it all off, different radiant colors of glittery tinsel hugged the enormous tree. Magnus, after all, couldn't live without his glitter. "It's my first year without a party, you know. Of course, there's one tomorrow and then on Friday and then I'm gonna try to have a weekend-long party...but I'm not having one on Christmas!"
"Shh! Do you know what he'll do to me if he wakes up!" Simon whispered harshly.
Magnus grinned. "Yes. I was hoping to enjoy the show."
Simon gave Magnus a death glare but took the marker out again. His soul purpose in life was just to pull one tiny little prank on Jace Too-Lazy-To-Pick-An-Actual-Last-Name no matter how pathetic. And he finally got the chance to do it on Christmas morning. There couldn't have been a sweeter gift.
"Why are they sleeping anyway?" Magnus pouted. "It's Christmas morning!" He looked like a six year old, upset that his parents refused to get up early to open presents.
"Maybe they're not used to getting up at five thirty AM," Simon suggested and carefully traced the marker along Jace's forehead. Simon's hand trembled - he had never been so scared! There so many things that could go wrong with this plan! If Jace woke up, he'd be dead. If Clary woke up, he'd still be dead. And if they both woke up...he shuddered at the thought.
"So? It's Christmas!" Magnus said pointedly. "It's not fair!"
"What's not fair?" Alec asked with a yawn. He had promised to come to the library once he got dressed, but his pajamas looked just like his normal clothes.
"That no one's awake," Isabelle answered, then yawned just to prove her point.
"Simon, what are you - "
"Shh. Just one last thing..." Simon replied, running the marker once more along Jace's forehead. "There. All done." He stepped back and admired his masterpiece.
Magnus, Alec and Isabelle peered at what Simon had wrote and tried their best to stifle laughter. "He's gonna kill you!" Isabelle laughed.
Simon looked at the marker in his hands and gasped. "You're right! I must burn the evidence!" He anxiously tossed the marker into the fireplace, which he was careful to stay away from.
"Yeah, the evidence. Good thing Jace, one of the most observant people in the world, won't notice all the black ink on your hands, huh?" Isabelle continued with a smirk.
Simon was paler than he had ever been. "I think I'll celebrate Christmas in Brazil this year," Simon said and dashed out of the room.
"Okay, presents now!" Magnus claimed, clapping his hands together.
"But Jace and Clary are still - "
Magnus shoved a box wrapped in sparkly purple paper into Alec's hands. "I think this one's for you."
Alec rolled his eyes but grinned, tore the paper off the box and threw open the lid. He reached inside and slowly pulled out a pair of tight leather pants, decorated with sparkles.
"Merry Christmas, Alec!" Magnus sang and wrapped the Shadowhunter in a hug.
"Merry Christmas, Magnus," Alec replied with rosy cheeks, reaching for Magnus's gift under the tree. It was wrapped in striped blue tissue paper and, with some blue fire from his fingers, the box was open and Magnus peered inside. His jaw dropped as he saw what was inside and looked up at Alec with wide eyes. Alec simply nodded and Magnus launched himself at him, knocking him down with a bone crushing hug. "Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!"
Alec laughed. "You're welcome. Clary told me you could get them at some mundane store and you watch them all the time so I thought - "
"You thought right!" Magnus interrupted and kissed him full on the mouth.
Simon came back in the room, his hands free of the black ink and raised an eyebrow at Isabelle, wondering why Alec and Magnus were suddenly making out on the floor.
Isabelle peered inside the box and grinned. "Alec bought him seasons one through nine of Project Runway."
Simon rolled his eyes and plopped down beside his girlfriend on the floor. Alec and Magnus finally broke apart and Magnus ordered him to go change into his new pants with the biggest grin he had ever worn.
"So what do you usually do at Christmas, vamp?" Magnus asked Simon with a grin.
"Well, I'm Jewish. But sometimes, me and Clary are actually stupid enough to go around singing Christmas carols," Simon admitted. "But we don't do that anymore because of the time -
"DECK THE HALLS WITH BOUGHS OF HOLLY! FA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA!" Magnus belted out before Simon could finish his story. Clary woke up with a start and Jace's eyes flew open as he flipped off the couch and smacked the floor. "TIS THE SEASON TO BE JOLLY! FA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA!"
Clary adjusted her Santa hat to cover her ears. The color of the hat almost matched her hair and bounced happily on her head. She had urged Jace to wear one but he had "refused to look ridiculous." Yet, he had said it while yawning in boxers and a T-shirt, trying to fix his hair which had flopped over to one side.
After Magnus had finished his song, Alec walked back in wearing Magnus's skin tight present. Jace's laughter bubbled out of his throat and Magnus had gave him a glare that he must've used magic to perform. But Jace had rolled around on the ground laughing anyway. Alec crossed his arms and shot Jace an evil look.
"No, please, don't," Jace protested through laughter. "I can't breathe. Just don't look at me. Just don't - " Alec gave him a death glare and he started laughing all over again. Alec simply rolled his eyes and plopped down beside Magnus and pecked him on the check.
Clary yawned and stretched. She looked down at Jace. "Merry Chr - " she started then burst out laughing and fell off the couch beside Jace. Simon tried to shrink behind Isabelle.
"What?" Jace muttered. He shot up from his spot on the floor and ran out of the room. All the way down the hall, the cry of, "SIMON!" could be heard. Jace stormed back into the room and angrily pointed to his forehead. On it, said
I LUV VAMPS
PS: SIMON WAZ HERE
"Um, merry Christmas?" Simon said before screaming and running out of the room with Jace following a close behind.
Magnus grinned. "Wow. I never knew what could happen if you stayed with friends instead of having a party! It's so much more fun!"
He laughed happily. "I can't wait till new year's!"
Just a little oneshot I wrote so I could wish you guys a Happy Holiday! Thanks for reading my first TMI fic and plz, as a present, review!
-Gallifrey101
