January 9th
It's snowing outside. I look out the window and watch Anna play, wishing that I could join her but knowing I can't.
Classes are going well since Mother and Father sent for the new tutor. Kingdom Studies is still my favorite subject, though I have taken a fancy to studying astronomy. My teacher knows nothing of my powers and, I believe, thinks that I am just incredibly sheltered.
I allow myself to create one snowflake every few days. Father does not know, or else he would have put me under constant supervision. Some days I just want to run around outside, free from all restrictions and freezing everything in sight. But if I did that, I might hurt somebody. And that is the last thing I want to do.
January 17th
Today Mother, Father, and Anna went down to meet with the townspeople. I took advantage of the situation. I let loose everything I've been holding in for the past five years, and, needless to say, my entire bedroom froze over. I now sit on the frozen floor, desperately wishing with all my heart that I won't have to go back to those – horrid days of nothingness.
I feel horrible at shutting Anna out, but Father says it's for the best that we have minimal contact. I wish
No. No more wishing. Why waste time on silly thoughts of freedom when it won't ever happen?
I have resolved myself to my fate. I will never be free from the swirling storm inside of me or these restrictions I so hate.
April 6th
The snow is finally melting. Anna sits outside, staring at the snowman she made last week. She's holding his carrot nose, which fell off yesterday. She looks rather sad, and I don't think it's because of her watery friend.
I want to scoop her up in a big hug and tell her I still love her, but…
My powers are getting stronger. It's getting harder to conceal my feelings. Even as I write, I can feel the frost forming on my fingertips. No. Stop.
Conceal, don't feel – don't let it show…
June 7th
Today is Anna's birthday. I cannot even tell you how much it meant to me when Father and Mother told me that I would be allowed me to participate in a few of the celebrations. When I woke up this morning, it was raining. But as soon as Father told me I could leave my room, I looked outside and there was a rainbow right outside my window. I'm sure that my smile reached from one ear to the other, and when I looked at Mother, I could tell she was happy too.
I ran out of the castle into the courtyard, even dipping my fingers in the fountain. Of course I stopped doing that when the water began to freeze, but that did not put much of a damper on my joy at being allowed to roam the castle freely. For the first time in a long time, I laughed.
Anna acted a little strange around me, but I didn't care. For a few hours, I was almost free.
