Sin.

The word sounds wicked.

Evil.

Malicious.

Yet it sounds sensual.

Voluptuous.

Tempting.

It is complicated to understand why things have two sides. That something as simple as a word can mean more then one thing, that a being can feel more then one thing. That a being can BE more then one being.

Like him.

He is the soft guardian that only I have the pleasure of knowing. The sweet smile, the soft chuckle. His sweet whisper. His soft touch. There is his human side. And then?

His demonic side. The side that pushes me away. Fights the world. Hates himself. The things he might do, that he will do. Almost monstrous. This is the same side that tries to run. Get away from the problems at hand.

Sins like skeleton are so very hard to find.

Yet he tries to hide his sins, his skeletons. The ghosts of the past. The demons to come and slowly and softly, he is crumbling under his broken resistance. This fight he hold within himself. With his body, his soul, his mind.

I stand under the trees, moonlight washing over the landscape. I look towards his room. His very own prison. He looks himself in that small chamber and I cannot help but wonder.

'What do you think off when you are all alone?'

I wonder what ponders in his head, how I long to understand. For a minute, see a glance of the mysterious mind of his. One chance to understand the struggles that pull you away from me.

I walk under the dimply light night, the breeze caressing my skin. I shiver. It suddenly feels so cold. Much like the metal hidden within my jacket. I feel it clearly against my skin. I lose all train of thought. All I can think of are the words that you muttered to me.

"Shoot me now"

I pull the gun out and stare at it closely. I can almost see myself in the reflection of the shinny cold silvery metal. This weapon that I have never been afraid of now holds all my fears. All my hopes. All my dreams. The power of destroying my world. The power, to end his life.

The end of his, would be the end of mine.

Memories hit me, much as rain hits the groud in a rough fury. I put the weapon away. I push myself to run, up to that dimly lit room.

'I promise'

All these words are ringing through my mind as I run through the halls.

I open the door and there he is. Against the wall, that awful medicine container left open, and the pills sprawled out over the floor. I look at him directly, into those eyes that have come to haunt me. In my mind, in my dreams. He bows his head in shame, turning from me.

"Do you remember the night we met?"

All he does is nod, he will not speak to me.

"Do you remember what I said?"

At this, he lifts his head one again, and I see those memorizing eyes. He doesn't remember.

"What?"

His voice was barely a whisper but I heard it clear as day.

"I told you 'I will always be by your side. You are stuck with me. As long as you are willing to fight, I will fight with you... I promise', Remember that?"

He softly nods as he pushes to his feet, walking away from me.

"I will stay by your side. Down this road. You can push me down. Throw me into the dirt but I will get back up and continue on. You can give up, but I never will. I will not let them win. Let's forget them. Forget their rules. Forget what they say. "

I grasp his cold hand within my warm on. And I bring my wrist up to his neck, the spell beginning to take over him. His eyes close as he knows what will come. Once fallen to the bed. I ready for what will happen next when he will awake.

"Let us commit sin"

'You and I, Now and always'