Sweet Dreams – By Darlin
-xox-
Ororo Munroe, being a thief extraordinaire, followed her fellow X-Man, Logan, into the city using her winds to keep him from detecting her scent. Sidewalks were crowded with people so she just walked up to him and took his hand in hers, imagining he'd smile, glad to see it was her even though they'd broken up.
Startled, Logan pulled his hand free, spun about, claws out. He never had a chance to smile. She wished she could have known if he was actually glad to see her. But he was immediately struck by lightning. Just like that. Ororo smiled.
"How many ways can you kill a Wolverine?" Ororo wondered out loud.
Electrocution of course. Harsh, cruel, certainly fun to watch in this case. But too quick, wouldn't do. Surely, she thought, there must be at least ten decent ways to kill a Wolverine, ten good methods that would ensure a long, slow, agonizing death now that he didn't have his healing factor.
"You talking about a real wolverine like the kind on PBS or . . . um, our Wolvie?" Jubilee asked, hoping Ororo had just been watching too much TV.
Ororo looked up at the young woman who continued eating her bowl of cereal. She'd forgotten she wasn't alone in the kitchen.
"Logan's hard to kill even without his healing factor," Betsy said, and added in a show of support, "The tosser!" then gave Ororo a sympathetic look before she took a sip of coffee.
"Without his healing factor and claws I could probably suck all his blood out," Jubilee said thoughtfully, the idea appealing, well if it weren't Logan's blood she would be draining.
"Please tell me you're still fighting off that blood lust thing with the stuff Hank gave you,"Betsy said.
"Are you talking about Logan then?" Kurt asked.
Ororo smiled. Not because she was thinking of Logan but because she had missed Kurt and every time he spoke with his sweet German accent it made her happy.
"It's an interesting question, one Charles definitely considered," Betsy reminded them.
But Ororo just said, "A wolverine's simply that, a wolverine." And she pushed away from the table and stood up.
"Wolverine's are too dangerous to try to kill unless you trap them," Kurt said. He watched her, sure she was talking about their Wolverine which kind of made him happy even though he fully supported the principle of not killing their teammates. But he'd been watching her ever since they'd all sat down for breakfast. Now his eggs and sausages and his coffee were cold.
Ororo tossed her own cold coffee into the sink. She wanted to throw the mug in the sink, see it break, hear the crash. No, it would be better if she struck Logan with it. And with the frying pan on the stove, full of oil. She'd heat that up, watch his face melt away. She smiled.
"Can we stop talking about killing the only father figure I have?"
"You were willing to drink his blood," Betsy said.
"I didn't say that! I said . . ."
Ororo smiled as she blocked out their argument and let herself enjoy another daydream. This time she saw herself tracking Logan from the air. He was doing his usual run in the woods and she made him have his healing factor because it always came back and it was much more fun to think about really grisly methods of death for him so she could keep on killing him. She easily caught him with a hurricane blast and had him careening into trees, the ground, more trees, wait, she'd send him crashing many times into that stupid cabin he'd built on the grounds if it was still there. She briefly wondered if it was. She'd let the rocks pound him too after it was demolished and that was all that was left of his beloved little cabin in the woods. She'd play with him that way till she got tired and then she'd zap him. And zap him. And zap him. She'd zap him till he couldn't recover and the only thing left would be a molten pile of adamantium. Hmm, kind of like the Terminator movies she'd watched with him, he'd lost her after the first and second ones. Only he'd be bloody, torn up and worn out before she put him out of her misery. He deserved to die. Brutally. Just as brutally as he was when he broke up with her.
"Ororo?"
"Hmm?"
"Are you and Logan . . . are you two still . . . ?" Kurt paused, struggling for words to describe what exactly Ororo and Logan were.
"Fuck buddies," Jubilee supplied and shook her head as if to say tsk tsk.
"Jubilee, don't be so crass," Betsy admonished.
"Well that's what they are, at least that's what Deadpool told me but then I guess he's not the most reliable guy except he said he saw them or kinda saw them, not saw Ororo exactly I mean he said he didn't see her but he . . ."
"Why would you be speaking to Deadpool about me? About anything, Jubilee?"
"I didn't – I mean I just answered the door! Like, how was I supposed to know it was really Deadpool on the other side? Dude said he had a package so ta-da I opened the stupid door. Stupid package of old videos he said were Fantomex's dirty sex tapes and some equally dirty, really smelly socks and one hamburger happy meal he said he got when he was ten years old – it still looked good but I swear it was petrified!" She shrugged. It wasn't her fault. How many times had every one of them opened the door for the UPS guy when they weren't dead?
"Monitor at the door, camera's are all over campus, one aimed at the front door," Betsy told her and then, "Sex tapes as in VHS tapes?"
"Huh?"
"Er, what did you do with the package?"
"What? I sat down and watched that kook's crap on my brand new video player, washed his socks so I could wear them and ate his old food, like what do ya think I did with it, Betts, huh? I threw it the hell away!"
Betsy looked relieved. But Kurt wondered if she was into porno, clearly mistaking her look of bliss.
"Irrespective, Deadpool may not be the lunatic he leads us to believe he is," Ororo said. "He's quite perceptive actually. That's really all Logan and I ever were."
Kurt frowned but putting his strong religious beliefs regarding sin aside he quickly smiled. Ororo was free. She was free!
Ororo smiled again, lost in another daydream. Since he liked it when she handcuffed him to the bed that's what she'd do next time he came around her for she was certain he would be back every now and again. They both knew she was that good. Him, not so much with the loss of that super healing factor. But after giving him the best loving he'd ever have again, his last, she would use one of her many knifes and start cutting. Hmm. One ball, the second ball and then . . .
"Ororo? You okay?" Betsy asked.
Ororo looked up. She was quite aroused. Thoughts of Logan did that. She hated Logan. How many ways could she kill him? Which would be the most enjoyable for her?
"You weren't really in love with him or anything," Jubilee said, yet not quite sure of Ororo's feelings so it was also a question.
"Love is such an overrated word," Ororo said thinking of her ex-husband.
Jubilee looked happier. So then Ororo wasn't in love with her Wolvie and everything would be okay. Everything would go back to normal.
"I do not love Logan, Jubilee," Ororo reassured her and Jubilee beamed.
"Would you want to have dinner with me then?" Kurt boldly asked.
"Dinner is also overrated," Ororo said as she looked at her attractive, fresh from the dead teammate and found herself thinking that dinner could be skipped and they could get to the fun stuff first. She smiled.
Kurt looked hurt and he was. Ororo was never cruel like this.
"Oh, cheer up, Kurt, she just wants to shag you, or rather, I should say, wants you for dinner." Betsy laughed.
"No fair reading my mind, Elisabeth!" Ororo barked though she grinned.
"You bloody well broadcasted that a mile off with the way you were looking at him; didn't need to read your mind!"
"So . . . um . . . dinner tonight?" Kurt asked again.
Ororo nodded. "I'd like that too but why don't we go for coffee now?"
"Ja, let's!"
"I wonder how one could kill him, he's not very killable," Betsy murmured after they left.
"Not you too!" Jubilee grumbled.
"Oh, don't worry about me, Jubes, I'm never planning on sleeping with Wolvie like you lot."
Jubilee ignored Betsy. She looked down at her cereal. It was soggy now. She absently started reading the back of the cereal box. Logan came in and sat beside her. He took her hand and she looked up with wide eyes full of surprise and hope and simmering joy. And then he pulled her onto his lap and kissed her. She melded right into his arms, his lips, his heart. He was soon picking her up, carrying her off, not caring that Betsy was there, never thought of Ororo ever again, and she knew they were going to his room. They were going to be together now, she could take care of him. They were finally going to . . .
"Hell no!" she burst out.
"I agree with you there, love. That would be a serious mistake, Jubilee, quite serious," Betsy said, shaking her head.
"You read my mind!" Again a statement question.
"Uh, no. It was all over your face plus you never denied that you were one of the lot who have it bad for him."
"I think I'm going to have to stop forgetting how much I didn't trust you and actually hated you when we first met way back when I rescued Logan and then we had to rescue you."
"Jubes, if he could shag someone like Squirrel Girl why would you even want someone like him?"
"Squirrel Girl? You mean that girl with all the squirrels that Doc Doom's afraid of, Luke Cage's babysitter?"
"She's his daughter's nanny."
"Nanny. Whatever. Ew. That's just gross! She's a kid almost! My age! No way he slept with her!" Her statement again was also a question.
Betsy laughed, got up and put her dishes in the dishwasher.
"Please tell me he didn't sleep with her, Betts!"
"I've not read his mind, too hard anyway. Why don't you ask him?"
"Ew," she said again and got up, leaving her soggy cereal and sweet daydream that had soured so quickly behind. For a long time now she'd half wanted something to happen there but he really was more of a father to her than a lover. "Ew," she groaned at that thought. And said, "Ew," again for good measure.
"Thank goodness!" Betsy said. No good could come out of Jubilee and Logan getting together, she knew this without a doubt. It was bad enough the little slut of a man had hurt Ororo.
She wondered, how many ways could you wreak vengeance on a Wolverine? She'd given him a serious headache for as long as she could keep it up without him getting suspicious, almost a full week. But that had been taxing. Making sure his laundry was lost meant he only smelled worse and they all suffered. Poor Ororo. Betsy was on her side in this. Logan was a wanker.
In bed, alone, later that night Ororo fell asleep smiling. She hadn't given Logan a second thought while she'd spent the day with Kurt. They'd had coffee in a little out of the way coffee shop Ororo liked, gone to the Bronx zoo and finally had dinner at Kurt's favorite German restaurant, Cafe Katja interestingly enough. They had to wait a bit to be seated but the wait had been worth it, the food delicious and the beer divine. She'd needed a drink and she'd desperately needed to get away from the school and Betsy's pity.
Her spontaneous date with Kurt had been fun. And . . . promising. Maybe dating would really be the first step to something nice and real. She and her ex husband and her most recent ex, Logan, whom she refused to let ruin her happiness any more, had immediately jumped in the sack. Well this time around with Logan there'd been no dating. If only she hadn't stayed in Africa, married that tosser would be king. Maybe the dates she and Logan were going on before all that could have brought them closer, given them something more, something solid, something lasting. Maybe . . . But no. She would never think like that again, never wish for something that obviously wasn't meant to be. Maybe what was meant to be were her and Kurt. He'd told her how beautiful she was and had even held her hand. It was sweet. So Kurt. It felt right. She smiled.
"Kurt," she whispered as she drifted off to sleep.
And Kurt, alone in his bed, thought of Ororo as he too drifted into slumber. "Sweet dreams, Ororo," he murmured before he fell asleep.
He didn't know that she did have sweet dreams that night. She dreamt not of revenge but of Kurt. But little did she know that within the year Logan would be dead, his healing factor completely gone he was utterly ripe for death. She was finished with thoughts of killing a Wolverine but had she been able to read the future it definitely would've given her still sweeter dreams.
~Finis~
