This is Puck's and Rachel's Adventures in raising me. This came to me after me and my mom were watching the Blame it On the Alcohol episode (for the millionth time, it's our favorite episode), and she remarked how much I was like Puck, since I'm wild, I love to party, and I even slightly look like him, except my hair isn't as dark, yet I could be as sweet as Rachel. My last name may not be Puckerman, but Hannah May is really my name. My last name? It's classified.

Sorry for the spelling. My cousin usually reads over my fanfics and betas them(Thats one of the pros of living next door to family who go on Fanfiction), but she couldn't.

Disclaimer: I do not ownGlee. If I did , all the guys would be shirtless. And if I did, all the Finchel in season three will be replaced by Puckleberry.

Did anybody see the new episode? I'm scared to. If Rachel says yes, I don't think I'll watch Glee anymore. But I know that's a lie.

Prologue

"Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you! Fuck you Noah Puckerman!" Rachel screamed, panting. This brought Puck back memories of nine years ago. Quinn was giving birth to Beth and screaming, "You suck you suck you suck!" This time, he knew better than to look as his daughter came out of his wife's vagina. "Fuck you!" As Rachel tossed back her head, screaming, a baby's cry filled the room. "She's a badass. She shouldn't cry." Puck said.

His daughter seemed to glare at him with the hazel eyes inherited from him.

"Shut the fuck up, Puckerman. She's only crying 'cause she saw your face." Santana said, squeezing Rachel's hand. The nurse calmly asked, "What is your daughters name?" Puck grinned and Rachel smiled and shook her head. "No, Noah. We're not going to name her Badass Puckerman. Remember, we decided on her name two months ago."

Flashback

"How about Puckleberry Puckerman?" Santana suggested. "My daughter's not going to be named after a fucking piece of fruit." Puck argued, momentarily forgetting what Puckleberry was. "Why not? Puckleberry's epic." Santana argued back. Next to her, in Finn's arms, Drizzle Innocence Hudson made a cooeing sound, as if agreeing with her mother.

"'Cause you gave your daughter a name that could get her ass kicked when she's older. What happens when she loses her V-card? She won't be so innocent then. And who the hell names their daughter Innocence?" Puck demanded. "That's her middle name you asshole. It was my idea, since their needs to be an innocent person thats related to me. She'll kick peoples asses if they screw with her. I'll make her be a nun. They don't get any action." Santana said.

"How about you name her Hannah?" Brittany suggested. "Hannah?" Rachel questioned. "Yeah. Hannah Montana reminds me of you. Her show is epic, and when you're singing in your shows, your epic. And you live to different lives. Your the Rachy we know and on stage," Brittany did spirit fingers, "You're Rachel Berry-Puckerman, though they don't say the Puckerman part."

Puck looked at Rachel and shrugged. "It's okay, not very badass but..." Rolling her eyes, Rachel playfully hit him. "Hannah's a good name."

"Her middle name should be May." Blaine suggested. "You know, since she's due in May." Artie shook his head. "No, there's a slight possibility she would be born in April, or June. What if she's born this month? March isn't a name, well, it qualifies as a last name."

"Not if Rachy tells her to be born in May." Brittany said, leaning her head against Artie's shoulder. "I told our baby to wait until June, like the doctors said." Artie nodded, smiling. "He's being a good boy and waiting patiently until then."

Rachel giggled and gently patted her belly. "Hannah May Puckerman, you better wait until May to be born!"

Flashback ends

Puck rolled his eyes. "Fine. Her name is Hannah May Puckerman, born on May 7th 2018, and she's going to be a badass!"

I already am Puck, I already am. Lol, anyway, I'll update next week, maybe tomorrow, I don't know.