Author's Note: Written for...
Prompt of the Day - Hogwarts. "I regret nothing."
No Regrets
1,663 words
Remus stood there long after the others departed. Phoenix staff were the first to leave, with James and the other heroes choosing to remain by Remus' side. But eventually, Remus sent them away too. James had lingered the longest, but realised that Remus needed to be alone to truly say his goodbyes.
Remus had no idea how to say goodbye to Sirius. The other man had meant everything to him and he had never envisioned a life without Sirius at his side. But here he was, staring down at the fresh dirt that covered the coffin, unable to let go.
He twisted the ring on his finger, wishing that it hadn't stopped echoing Sirius' heartbeat.
Remus let out a content sigh as he reached out for Sirius' hand, walking alongside him down the dark streets. It had been a perfect night so far, their first date in some months that hadn't been interrupted by a crisis that needed their immediate attention.
"It's a beautiful night," he said quietly, smiling as he felt Sirius play with his ring.
"Not as beautiful as you," Sirius murmured. He put an arm over Remus' shoulders, pulling him closer.
Remus opened his mouth to argue the point - Sirius was the prettiest man he had ever seen - but he was cut off as tires screeched nearby. Remus looked behind them, at a black van that had stopped in the middle of the street. He knew instinctively that something was wrong and looked around for somewhere for Sirius to hide. He spotted a laundromat across the street just as the van doors opened and shoved Sirius in that direction.
"Run," he ordered, preparing himself to transform.
Sirius hesitated, his eyes on the van. "But what about you?" he asked.
Remus shot him a look. He knew Sirius was protective of him, but he needed to make sure Sirius was safe. "Go, now," he insisted in his firmest voice.
Sirius gave a slight nod, disappearing across the street, and Remus turned his full attention back to the van. Men were emerging with guns now.
He clenched his teeth, feeling the shift of his bones as he began to transform. It was more painful when he rushed it, but he had to rush to keep Sirius safe.
He felt the first bullet fly over his left shoulder and thought fleetingly that he might have an easy time of disposing of these assassins if they couldn't aim well. He took a step forward, feeling his clothes become tight as the muscles in his arms and legs grew. From the looks on the shooters' faces, the transformation was making them nervous and he hoped to use it to his advantage. If they held off just a little longer, the bullets couldn't harm him.
The plan backfired. Remus heard the gunshot echo through the street and attempted to duck, his movements clumsy in a partially-transformed state. He fell to the pavement, covering his head and still expecting the bullet to graze him, but he felt nothing.
There were no more gunshots and he risked looking up, only to find Sirius lying on the ground in front of him, blood staining his shirt. The shooters were already piling back into their van and were driving away by the time Remus managed to drag himself over to Sirius.
"What were you thinking?" he muttered, taking off his own jacket to cover Sirius' wound. He wasn't a doctor, but he thought it looked bad.
"I had to protect you," Sirius said weakly, reaching for Remus' hand. "I regret nothing."
"You're an idiot. You should have let me handle it." With his free hand, Remus pulled out his phone and tried to call for help.
"It'll be okay. I love you."
By the time the ambulance arrived, Remus couldn't feel Sirius' pulse through the ring anymore.
"Remus, I think you need to put that ring aside," James said, coming into Remus' room at the headquarters of Phoenix and taking a seat on the bed.
Remus barely glanced up. James had knocked on the door countless times, but Remus hadn't answered. Clearly James wasn't taking his silence as an answer.
"Really, you're going mad, focusing on that ring. Sirius is gone, Remus. We're all mourning, but wearing that means that it'll be harder for you to accept that he's…" James hesitated on the last word, and when he finished his sentence, his voice wavered, "...dead."
Remus twisted the ring on his finger, choosing not to respond. He couldn't take the ring off because he wouldn't ever accept Sirius' fate. They had been talking about Sirius finishing his suit and actually joining them out in the field only recently. So how could he accept that this would never happen?
"Remus, I'm not leaving until you answer me," James pushed. "You know we're all here for you. Sirius would want you to accept—"
"Sirius isn't here to speak for himself," Remus muttered, frowning at James. "It's in poor taste to guess what he would or wouldn't want. I'm going to keep the ring on because it's the only thing left that connects us."
James left without another word, shutting the door behind him.
Remus continued twisting the ring, replaying Sirius' final moments over again in his mind, thinking of how he could have done things differently.
Thump.
He froze, his fingertips tingling from the heartbeat. He let out a shaky breath and shook his head. He had to have imagined the pulse. Sirius had been gone for over a week…
Thump.
There was no mistaking it. He urgently grabbed his keys and headed for the cemetery.
"We'll meet the rest of the team in a bit," James said, leading Remus into a meeting room. "Take a seat and get comfortable."
Remus pulled out the closest chair and sunk down into it, sighing softly. The chair was the most comfortable thing he had ever sat on and he decided he never wanted to get up.
"Phoenix are coming in here to meet you in a moment," James continued, taking a seat on the other side of the table. "You'll have a room here for as long as you need."
"And a place to contain me should I transform?" Remus asked.
James nodded slowly. "A containment cell, nothing more. From what I know about it, it'll lock onto you and be able to tell what form you're in. You won't be able to get out whilst transformed, but you'll be able to when you are back into this form."
"Good," Remus murmured. "I don't want to risk hurting anyone. It's why I took so long to get back to you about working with Phoenix."
"Good thing I stuck around to convince you," James said, lounging back and putting his legs up on the table. "Get comfortable. Your welcome party… well, he's not known for being on time."
"Hey, I'll have you know that my time is valuable," a voice said from the doorway, causing the pair to look around. Remus' eyes widened at the sight of the man. "You're a Black," he stated, glancing over at James. James didn't look concerned, and Remus relaxed slightly, looking back at the handsome man.
"I am. Sirius Black at your service." His eyes lingered on Remus for a long moment before his lips curved up into a smirk. "Completely at your service."
"Just a simple hello will do," James said, groaning slightly. "Why must you always flirt?"
"Not always," Sirius disagreed, moving from the doorway and taking a seat at the end of the table. He dropped the files he had been carrying down on the table. "My name precedes me it appears - or my family name does. What you may not know about the Blacks is that if one of us is born without powers, we're cast from the family. I chose to do something good in my life, so here I am… doing good." His smirk widened. "And you're here, and you're good. So how about I do—"
"Enough!" James shouted, looking between the pair with wide eyes. "I don't need to hear this so… let's get on with the meeting, shall we?"
It took Remus almost an hour to dig up Sirius' grave, pure adrenaline and the increasingly stronger pulse from the ring keeping him going through the exhausting task.
When he finally reached the coffin, he gave himself a moment to breathe and prepare for what he might find. There was a chance, though he didn't want to admit it, that the ring was broken and somehow emitted someone else's heartbeat. But he had to be sure.
Taking one last deep breath, he cautiously opened the lid. There was Sirius, dressed in his best suit, arms crossed over his chest, and looking more annoyed than Remus had ever seen him.
"It took you long enough," he said, immediately climbing from the coffin.
Remus stared at him, his mouth gaping open.
"And you're getting your best cardigan dirty," Sirius continued. "So… I'm alive. Regeneration or something? Maybe I have a power after all. So… how long was I dead? I assume I was dead, since you buried me." He looked hurt.
"I'm sorry," Remus blurted out. "I kept the ring on."
"I know. I felt your heartbeat speed up just after I woke, and again when I heard you digging. I wasn't worried for a moment because I knew you would come back for me. That's what matters, isn't it?"
"What matters is that you're alive," Remus said, relieved. He reached out, his fingers wrapping around Sirius' wrist. "I'm not imagining you."
"I would think not. I don't think anyone's mind could come up with such perfection," Sirius insisted. "Come here." He pulled Remus close and wrapped his arms around him.
"You'll get your best suit dirty," Remus murmured.
"I can wash it," Sirius replied softly. "You can get me dirty any day."
Remus laughed as the tears filled his eyes. "Same old Sirius."
