The sky outside looked dark and dreary. Inside, it was hardly better, Scully mused. Mulder was deeply engrossed in some work. As was she. Supposedly, anyway. Once every while her eyes strayed. First they had landed behind Mulder, on his poster: 'I want to believe'. She'd considered this sentence over and over again. Not just today, but many a days. Then her eyes had strayed to the man who'd hung it there. He was completely oblivious to her, which she found amazing. She'd make it a game, sometimes. How long would it take for him to realize she'd been staring at him? She always knew something to say when he finally looked up. His eyes then were often glassy, as if still in thought. It seemed as if he looked through her. But only sometimes. There were other times when he almost smiled; as if he knew what she'd been doing. Knowing she – of all people, who preached him to do his work and to do it properly – abandoned her work just to look at him. Each time she hoped he couldn't guess her thoughts, because then he'd know she loved him.
Looking back, it had started suddenly, last summer. They'd been down in brooding, burning Texas investigating a case. The place was called Raintree County; a beautiful name for a horrible place. It had all been about this woman. Actually, she'd been an heiress. What exactly she would inherit, Scully had never understood. Then again she hadn't cared. Although she'd cared for the way that leggy blonde had continuously stared at Mulder, who, of course, hadn't even noticed. At least he had pretended not to notice. He had only cared for the case involving the famous Yellow River on the heiress' farm, which had come close to being re-named Red River - thanks to all the blood. For Scully this case had merely been a scam, just a way for the heiress to gain attention. Mulder had smiled at that, as if he'd seen right through her jealousy. That was something she hadn't even fully admitted to herself at that point. In the end, a group of local women had been found guilty. They'd been trying to put the blame on the heiress, who they loathed. A feeling Scully had understood completely. Nevertheless, they had finally left brooding, burning Texas to find themselves back in Washington, D.C. and in front of Mulder's car.
"Can I give you a lift?" He'd deliberately used this term to make her furious; the heiress had used it, too, in order to feign British or some un-American heritage.
"Kind of a big lift, don't you think?" Scully had faked that same accent; two could play at this game.
"Well, you could stay at my place so I wouldn't have to drive around town, true. I just don't think you'll say yes. On the other hand it's the middle of the night and while I know you're capable of taking care of yourself, I'd rather take you home myself." Just because Mulder had seemed so honest and just because of her new found, or at least newly admitted feelings for Mulder, she had agreed. For him to take her home anyway.
"Soooo, stazione termini." Mulder had said in a fake Italian accent upon arriving at Scully's apartment. He'd smiled lovingly, but also tiredly at her.
"Mulder? Would you like some coffee?" It had come out instantly, like an impulse.
"I confess coffee would be perfection." Another one of the heiress' favorite terms. Scully had wondered if he had caught up on her jealousy after all.
"But I think I'd better get home. Work starts soon enough." Scully had smiled and nodded at that. They'd shared a look that had been longer than necessary. They hadn't been ready for 'maybe' yet, not with Scully still confused about her new found feelings, deeply buried under several layers of herself. She had watched him drive away, certain that everything had been doomed to change from thereon anyway. At least for her. Sure enough, she had dreamed of him that night.
That had been the day it had all started. Now, back at the present day Scully duly noted that it had started to rain. The splattering on the small window frame provided a nice background sound to the silence of the two human beings inside. Again, she could not concentrate on her work, but only on the man not so far away from her. Wearing his glasses. There was some stubble around his full, beautiful lips. A five o'clock shadow bordering on a definite need to shave. Somehow, at the moment, she was reminded of a young Freud. She smiled secretively and repressed a laugh. That would have attracted his attention surely and she did not want that. It was her special time; it was a guilty pleasure and as much as she tried not to do it, watching him like this was some of the few things she actually indulged in. It was one of the rare moments where she could revel in the fact that this was the man for her, the man she loved.
It was Saturday and Scully felt like it. Apart from the joys springing from staring at Mulder unnoticed, she didn't want to work. There was life outside these walls. There was a distinction between workdays and the weekend. At least there used to be. Mulder didn't mind working on Saturdays and more often than not, Sundays. And he had made her work weekends, too. They were the misfits of the FBI. Scully mused that she could probably add lonelyhearts to that, but she wouldn't. Not willingly. Even though she had no idea what the rumors were about at the water cooler. Once she had heard that there was a rumor about her and Mulder already being married. How wrong people could be. Scully looked at her partner, so engrossed in his passion, his life and love that was his work. She knew he loved her with all that was free in him, with every inch of his being that was not haunted or driven with the search for his sister. Mulder looked up at that very moment. His eyes slightly enlarged by his glasses, he seemed unfocused. Scully felt a wave of love tumble through her and, for the first time, knew nothing to say.
"Was there anything you wanted?" He questioned with his eyebrows slightly raised and the hint of a smile on his lips. Scully blushed, because his beauty distracted her. She at once decided she could no longer indulge in these staring moments if they were to end like this one.
"No… no, there wasn't. It's just this –", Scully looked up, through the window that was already plastered with thick, heavy raindrops, "the weather is bothering me." She blushed
"Oh." Mulder said. "Well, you should be glad then that we're in here, working." Only that she hadn't been working all that much really. He didn't need to know that, though.
"I'd rather be somewhere sunny, you know. Working in the sun, maybe."
"A place in the sun? To work? Gee, Scully, you surprise me."
"Why is that, Mulder?"
"You with your fair skin working in the sun." He grinned.
"Why, thank you, Mulder." Scully feigned being angry and indicated that she'd rather go on working. She was surprised herself to find she had done next to nothing. Again, she blushed. Mulder was quiet for a moment but he had turned the tables. She felt his eyes burning into her, as if he knew. Knew that she hadn't been working at all; knew that all she'd done was staring at him, contemplating him. Loving him. Her face seemed to burn with embarrassment.
"Gentlemen-rankers out on a spree, Damned from here to Eternity, God ha' mercy on such as we, Baa! Yah! Bah!" Mulder exclaimed suddenly, looking at her, as if in question. She stared back. He did these things, sometimes. Blurting out phrases or quotes that seemed not to be relevant in any way except for that they must have been roaming around in his head. She was sure if she asked him to quote anyone or anything, he could.
"Kipling, Mulder?"
"Why not? I'm surprised you actually know it."
"Thanks, Mulder. I do read, occasionally. If I don't have to work."
"Ouch, I get it. I'm almost done anyway. Let's finish this and then I'll buy you a coffee and let you read something." Scully watched as Mulder started writing away like mad again. She was mesmerized at how his fingers danced and flew over the keyboard. Beautiful hands and magnificent fingers. Inwardly, she sighed. As if someone had cut off a string, Mulder stopped writing and got up. Scully startled and watched in slow motion as he rounded the desk and stood before her and her accomplished work. Or the lack therefore.
"Wow." Mulder said, leaning over her. He was too close for her to think clearly. Usually she was quite composed around him, no matter her feelings towards him. No matter how much she loved him. Her guard was down though, and Mulder just smelled too damn good.
"So you've been working real hard, huh?" He asked and she felt his breath somewhere on her neck; feeling it everywhere it seemed. In connection with his hoarse voice, she couldn't help but shiver.
"It's well, I… don't know. The weather, you know. Distracting me." Distracted she'd been. Just not by the weather. But something in his demeanor made her think that he had known all along. Known that she hadn't been working. That she'd been staring at him. Just the thought that he could know… she felt warm suddenly. Much too warm.
"The weather, sure, sure." She heard the smile in his voice clearly, but he did not step away from her.
"And why my dear Dr. Scully did you feel you did not need to work while your partner did?"
"Mulder…"
"Oh don't Mulder me."
"Usually I'm the one who has to remind you to finish paperwork."
"Usually doesn't count in court."
"In court? Are we playing Judgment at Nuremberg, Mulder?"
"I'd rather be playing something else." He whispered even closer to her. Scully was nervous. Despite her feelings for him, she wasn't sure if she was ready for their game to go this far. If either of them were ready for it. Maybe Mulder was just making another joke. Just some innocent innuendo. Only Scully couldn't tell anymore and she felt tired; it was Saturday, damn it. Maybe she could play, too, just for a moment. Just for a short while.
"And what game? Does it have a name?" Her voice, even in her own ears, sounded sly. She blushed and was glad that Mulder stood behind her and couldn't see her face.
"Hm…" Mulder breathed against her neck and it felt so hot that she wondered if he'd come even closer.
"You could call it the young lions, maybe. You know playing with each other… biting at each other, but not hurting each other and…" his voice disappeared in a soft kiss on her neck.
Scully startled from the suddenness of everything. Hadn't it all started with just one look? That had lasted maybe one moment too long, on too many occasions? As Mulder's lips trailed along her neck, gently but generously, Scully realized the full impact of their actions. They shared a friendship – didn't they? – that they were jeopardizing with all this fooling around. Scully knew what she wanted. It was Mulder. Ever since last summer if she knew one thing it was just that; Mulder needed to be in her life. In what instance was not as important as that he was there. And wasn't she jeopardizing just that? The stability of him in her life. She couldn't think straight with those lips of his trailing, mapping her skin. Her whole being seemed to split into two; there was her mind, her brain that told her to stop this no matter how much she wanted it. But who wanted it anyway? The other part of her being; composed of her heart and her soul. Her skin now the defector – of her mind, that was. One part after another left her brain, allying with her heart. Surrendering. Scully felt blood pump through her body faster and more urgently. Hotter. It seemed to burn her up and all because of him. Like a wild river inside of her, rocking everything that was not yet on Mulder's side. Her heart. Her soul. Her emotions took over and left no room for any objections.
Outside the day looked dark and dreary. Inside Dana Scully was overruled by her emotions and by her love. And the man they called Mulder. The man she loved.
THE END
A/N: I wrote this story a few years ago and it was previously posted on a German XF forum. I decided to put it up here as well. The story came to be as a challenge for me to include the titles from all of Montgomery Clift's movies.
