Wishing You were Somehow Here Again: A Songfic
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling,
various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and
Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or
trademark infringement is intended. The song "Wishing you were somehow here again"
comes from the musical The Phantom of the Opera. Andrew Lloyd Webber and Charles Hart
composed the music and lyrics.
**************
You were once
My one companion…
You were all
That mattered…
You were once
A friend and father—
Then my world
Was shattered
*************
A solitary figure made its way through the cemetery. The man left a set of
footprints in the fresh snowdrifts that weaved between the icy headstones. He was of average
height; there was a hint of grey in his untidy black hair. His brilliant green eyes stared down
through a pair of glasses that threatened to slide down his nose. When he reached his
destination, a statue of a guardian angel wielding a sword carved from black granite, he
crouched low and wiped the snow and ice away, revealing the inscription:
Sirius Altair Black
June 27, 1960—
December 13, 2025
Dum spiro spero
*****************
Wishing you were
Somehow here again…
Wishing you were
Somehow near…
Sometimes it seemed
If I just dreamed,
Somehow you would
Be here…
*****************
The memories were still fresh in Harry's mind. He could hear Sirius' voice so clear that
he may have been there. Years before, during his third year at Hogwarts, Harry had heard the
dying words of his parents through the power of the Dementors. He wanted to overcome his
fears and drive the Dementors away, but also secretly wished to hear them again. The same
thing is happening now, he thought, only it's Sirius, not my mum and dad. Listening to echoes in
my mind won't bring him back.
********************
Wishing I could
Hear your voice again…
Knowing that I
Never would
********************
"Oh I know Crouch all right. He was the one who gave the order for me to be sent
to Azkaban—without a trial."
"Harry, this piece of vermin is the reason you have no parents. This cringing bit
of filth would have seen you die too, without turning a hair. You heard him. His own
stinking skin meant more to him that your whole family."
"Believe me, believe me Harry. I never betrayed James and Lily. I would have died
before I betrayed them."
"And don't forget, if you're talking about me among yourselves, call me Snuffles,
okay?"
"Harry I as good as killed them. I persuaded Lily and James to change to Peter as
the Secret-Keeper instead of me…I'm to blame I know it…And when I saw their house,
destroyed, and their bodies…I realized what Peter must've done…what I'd done…"
"You'll meet me very soon, Harry. I promise you. But I must do what I can, you
understand don't you?"
*****************
Dreaming of you
Won't help me to do
All that you dreamed
I could…
*****************
"Well, you could always join Lord Voldemort and have a prosperous career in
torture and execution."
"C'mon Sirius. Be Sirius," said Harry playfully. A moment later he realized his
mistake. "That's not what I meant to say—"
Sirius smiled. "People have always found difficulty avoiding making bad puns
with my name, your father particularly. Remus spent one night looking up synonyms for
'serious' and compiling a list for James to use in times of emergency. My name was
always a problem. Made it damned near impossible to introduce myself. I blame my dear
mother and her undying love of astronomy."
"Back to the business at hand," Harry said, "that is, if you've finished skipping
down Memory Lane."
Sirius sighed. "Like I've said before, you should play your strengths."
"You sound like strange combination of Percy Weasley and Moody. 'It all depends
on where you want to go Harry.'" he mimicked Percy in a falsetto voice before switching
to Moody's distinct growl. "Play your strengths."
"They were both right. You should consider your personality, strengths,
weaknesses, your likes, and dislikes when deciding on a career. They're all going to come
into play eventually. That's what I did at your age."
"And how did that work out?"
"Horribly. I came to the conclusion that I was a determined, stubborn, obnoxious
rich kid that hated rules, had complete disregard for authority with a violent penchant
toward greasy haired Slytherins. I was hot tempered and had the tendency to be a
trigger-happy. So, I became an Auror." Harry looked torn between amusement and
worry. "Don't worry. You'll find something that fits. It doesn't matter to me what you do,
what matters to me it the fact that you try your absolute best and enjoy yourself."
*****************************
Passing bells and sculptured angels,
Cold and monumental
Seem, for you,
The wrong companions
*****************************
Harry came back to reality with an unpleasant jolt and pulled his cloak tighter in an
attempt to ward of the gusts of icy wind. He looked up at the angel. It was as cold and
unfeeling; the expression it wore seemed to challenge visitors to approach. This formidable
statue, Harry thought, was nothing like his godfather, the man who escaped the dread Azkaban
Fortress single handedly (or pawed, as it were), who lived in the wilderness, spending the winter
huddled in a cave, always ready with a comeback, a fierce warrior during the war, a father
figure, a troublemaker, and most of all, a friend.
****************
Too many years
Fighting back tears…
Why can't the past
Just die…?
*****************
"Harry? Harry?"
Harry rose heavily to his feet and his legs shook slightly. He moved across the
room slowly, uncertain if his legs would support his weight. Ron and Hermione were
standing outside the door, their faces flushed. Harry stepped aside slightly to let them
pass. They stood for a moment in uncomfortable silence, gazing at one another.
Hermione pulled her friend into a tight hug, whispering reassuringly in his ear. Ron put
his arm around Harry's shoulders in a comforting way.
********************
Wishing you were
Somehow here again
Knowing we must
Say good-bye…
Try to forgive…
Teach me to live…
Give me the strength
To try…
No more memories
No more silent tears
No more gazing across
The wasted years
Help me say
Good-bye.
******************
Author's Note: For all non-Latin students, like my self, the phrase "Dum spiro spero" means,
"While I breathe, I hope". I found it online and thought that it would make a fine family motto
for our Sirius Black. I have all sorts of twisted reasons for Sirius' middle name, date of birth and
death that I could go on an on about…But I won't.
~Amanda *off to do her English homework*
