Wishing You were Somehow Here Again: A Songfic

Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling,

various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and

Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or

trademark infringement is intended. The song "Wishing you were somehow here again"

comes from the musical The Phantom of the Opera. Andrew Lloyd Webber and Charles Hart

composed the music and lyrics.

**************

You were once

My one companion…

You were all

That mattered…

You were once

A friend and father—

Then my world

Was shattered

*************

             A solitary figure made its way through the cemetery. The man left a set of

footprints in the fresh snowdrifts that weaved between the icy headstones. He was of average

height; there was a hint of grey in his untidy black hair. His brilliant green eyes stared down

through a pair of glasses that threatened to slide down his nose. When he reached his

destination, a statue of a guardian angel wielding a sword carved from black granite, he

crouched low and wiped the snow and ice away, revealing the inscription:

Sirius Altair Black

June 27, 1960—

 December 13, 2025

Dum spiro spero

*****************

Wishing you were

Somehow here again…

Wishing you were

Somehow near…

Sometimes it seemed

If I just dreamed,

Somehow you would

Be here…

*****************

      The memories were still fresh in Harry's mind. He could hear Sirius' voice so clear that

he may have been there. Years before, during his third year at Hogwarts, Harry had heard the

dying words of his parents through the power of the Dementors. He wanted to overcome his

fears and drive the Dementors away, but also secretly wished to hear them again. The same

thing is happening now, he thought, only it's Sirius, not my mum and dad. Listening to echoes in

my mind won't bring him back.

********************

Wishing I could

Hear your voice again…

Knowing that I

Never would

********************

      "Oh I know Crouch all right. He was the one who gave the order for me to be sent

to Azkaban—without a trial."

      "Harry, this piece of vermin is the reason you have no parents. This cringing bit

of filth would have seen you die too, without turning a hair. You heard him. His own

stinking skin meant more to him that your whole family."

      "Believe me, believe me Harry. I never betrayed James and Lily. I would have died

before I betrayed them."

      "And don't forget, if you're talking about me among yourselves, call me Snuffles,

okay?"

      "Harry I as good as killed them. I persuaded Lily and James to change to Peter as

the Secret-Keeper instead of me…I'm to blame I know it…And when I saw their house,

destroyed, and their bodies…I realized what Peter must've done…what I'd done…"

"You'll meet me very soon, Harry. I promise you. But I must do what I can, you

understand don't you?"

*****************

Dreaming of you

Won't help me to do

All that you dreamed

I could…

*****************

      "Well, you could always join Lord Voldemort and have a prosperous career in

torture and execution."

           

      "C'mon Sirius. Be Sirius," said Harry playfully. A moment later he realized his

mistake. "That's not what I meant to say—"

      Sirius smiled. "People have always found difficulty avoiding making bad puns

with my name, your father particularly. Remus spent one night looking up synonyms for

'serious' and compiling a list for James to use in times of emergency. My name was

always a problem.  Made it damned near impossible to introduce myself. I blame my dear

mother and her undying love of astronomy."

      "Back to the business at hand," Harry said, "that is, if you've finished skipping

down Memory Lane."

      Sirius sighed. "Like I've said before, you should play your strengths."

      "You sound like strange combination of Percy Weasley and Moody. 'It all depends

on where you want to go Harry.'" he mimicked Percy in a falsetto voice before switching

to Moody's distinct growl. "Play your strengths."

      "They were both right. You should consider your personality, strengths,

weaknesses, your likes, and dislikes when deciding on a career. They're all going to come

into play eventually. That's what I did at your age."

      "And how did that work out?"

"Horribly. I came to the conclusion that I was a determined, stubborn, obnoxious

rich kid that hated rules, had complete disregard for authority with a violent penchant

toward greasy haired Slytherins. I was hot tempered and had the tendency to be a

trigger-happy. So, I became an Auror." Harry looked torn between amusement and

worry. "Don't worry. You'll find something that fits. It doesn't matter to me what you do,

what matters to me it the fact that you try your absolute best and enjoy yourself."

     

*****************************

Passing bells and sculptured angels,

Cold and monumental

Seem, for you,

The wrong companions

*****************************

      Harry came back to reality with an unpleasant jolt and pulled his cloak tighter in an

attempt to ward of the gusts of icy wind. He looked up at the angel. It was as cold and

unfeeling; the expression it wore seemed to challenge visitors to approach. This formidable

statue, Harry thought, was nothing like his godfather, the man who escaped the dread Azkaban

Fortress single handedly (or pawed, as it were), who lived in the wilderness, spending the winter

huddled in a cave, always ready with a comeback, a fierce warrior during the war, a father

figure, a troublemaker, and most of all, a friend.

****************

Too many years

Fighting back tears…

Why can't the past

Just die…?

*****************

      "Harry? Harry?"

      Harry rose heavily to his feet and his legs shook slightly. He moved across the

room slowly, uncertain if his legs would support his weight. Ron and Hermione were

standing outside the door, their faces flushed. Harry stepped aside slightly to let them

pass. They stood for a moment in uncomfortable silence, gazing at one another.

Hermione pulled her friend into a tight hug, whispering reassuringly in his ear. Ron put

his arm around Harry's shoulders in a comforting way.

********************

Wishing you were

Somehow here again

Knowing we must

Say good-bye…

Try to forgive…

Teach me to live…

Give me the strength

To try…

No more memories

No more silent tears

No more gazing across

The wasted years

Help me say

Good-bye.

******************

Author's Note: For all non-Latin students, like my self, the phrase "Dum spiro spero" means,

"While I breathe, I hope". I found it online and thought that it would make a fine family motto

for our Sirius Black. I have all sorts of twisted reasons for Sirius' middle name, date of birth and

death that I could go on an on about…But I won't.

~Amanda *off to do her English homework*