Author: Methinks I lack commitment. While the Dragon Age craze is still on, I will post this... Anyways... I would like to thank Kira Tamarion for beta-reading this piece! You are awesome! :D

Warnings: If you don't like Homosexuality, then I suggest you leave. This story features a romantic relationship between two MALES. So if YAOI/slash isn't your cup of tea, this is a good chance to exit. Also, if you are uneasy with Rape, bits of emotional torture, angst, and unhealthy relationships... you can leave just as well.

Summary: "What makes you so sure you won't do the same as him? What gives you the assurance that you won't end up like him?" Cullen's mouth felt dry and he couldn't think of a good answer, but deep down, he is sure that he won't be the same. "Prove me I'm wrong. Prove it to me that you are truly different."

Blizzard

The first time he saw him, he was talking with some plain-looking human apprentice, and Maura Amell. The second time, he was in the library reading dusty old tomes. And the third time, he was practicing lightning spells while tutored by First Enchanter Irving.

Maura would mention Surana sometimes, when they talked. He never actually met the young elf, but from what Maura said, Surana was quiet most of the time, and he only mingled with Jowan and Maura because they sat together in many Herbalism lessons when they were younger; they became friends as they grew older. Maura also mentioned that Surana is one of the most gifted apprentices in their age group, and that he is Irving's star student.

He met Surana, for the first time in the library. It was when he met Surana the second time that they finally met officially.

Cullen was nineteen, and Surana was sixteen at that time.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

One of the older knights, Drass, was sick. Cullen was assigned his shifts until Drass well; from noon to supper, one of the places he had to patrol was the library.

All he had to do was walk around, check what the apprentices and other mages are doing, then walk around again. Then again, he had to be much more attentive when doing his patrols as well.

It was a slow and lazy day, the children were making minor ruckuses, enchanters were researching about some discovery one of the senior enchanters made, and a few apprentices were reviewing for their classes or for their Harrowing. As a Templar, boredom while on the job is dangerous since their job was protecting these people from the world and from themselves. However, at times like these, even Greagoir might want a Maleficar to show up, just to liven up the day, or at least let that apprentice –Andy, Andrew… Cullen doesn't remember his name–try and run away again, just to be able chase him.

Cullen almost cheered when an unsteady pile of books toppled over into a bookcase (not that it was uncommon, rebellious and unruly apprentices loved toppling them.) Both shelves fell over into a chaotic heap of splintered wood and scattered books. The librarian was screeching, and an Elven apprentices were helping her fix the mess he supposedly caused. A few apprentices called the staff to remove the debris and ruined bookcase.

The librarian muttered under her breath 'Damn apprentices. Now I have to bolt all of the cases them down'. The librarian was also barking orders at the other templars and apprentices, and even those that shrunk away from her murderous rage, did what was asked.

Luckily for Cullen, he ducked behind a bookcase, and managed to be spared from the mage that seemed more horrifying than an abomination. Not that I've ever seen one.

No matter how much the Chantry said how dangerous or terrifying mages can be, given the chance, Cullen can't help but feel sympathetic towards the elven apprentice, as he is left alone to collect the books that scattered around the floor.

The Templar padded towards the apprentice, his armored boots making loud clinks on the stone floor. The Elf barely glanced at him, and continued piling up the books in his arms then dumping them on the carts.

Cullen shifted awkwardly and cleared his throat; the sharp ears of the elf twitched. Cullen bent down, and piled a few books into the cart, as well, and helped the mage in collecting more.

Looking at the apprentice, Cullen couldn't help but notice the apprentice's deep scowl. It looks to him that Cullen's presence aggravated the Elf even more, and his scowl deepened when the Cullen began assisting him. He faced away from Cullen and continued to organize the fallen tomes, but his actions and expression showed how he hated this situation.

Well, a mage that hates Templars, how unusual. A small frown tugged at his lips. The older Knights did say that there are mages that dislike Templar presence… And plenty of Elves dislike humans as well.

Well, the boy is an Elf and a mage, and I am a human and a Templar…which means twice the hostility.

Neither talked, even if all of the books were already put away safely and the scrolls were tucked away to avoid damage. Neither initiated a conversation even as the Elven librarian returned and the destroyed bookcase was disposed of.

However, when Cullen walked away, he could have sworn the Elf's gaze was following him.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Drass was back on his feet, and Cullen's regular shifts returned – which meant patrolling the halls during in the morning, the library in the afternoons, and then the quarters at evenings. All of which were in the second floor.

During Cullen's free time, he hides in an alcove near the Senior Mage Quarters, talking to Maura.

"He isn't like that… Oh well, maybe he hates everyone a little, but Lirenel isn't that bad at all!" she explained, waving her arms somewhat exaggeratedly; it made her look cute.

"I'm not saying that he's unpleasant. Maybe we got off the wrong foot, or maybe he had a bad impression of me, or he doesn't like humans and templars. I believe you, don't worry." Maura gave the redhead a hesitant smile then sighed.

Cullen had heard rumors of Surana having his Harrowing before he turns eighteen. There were other… less pleasant rumors as well.

Looking at Maura, Cullen hopes that it's not true. Anyone the young Amell associates with can't possibly be of… malicious intent.

The Templar was about to open his mouth to talk, but the sound of three bells chimed. Both sighed.

"We'll talk about this next time." Cullen nodded.

Quietly, Amell stepped out first, dodging templars and a few busy mages. Minutes passed, Cullen deemed it for him to step out, and then head over to the library for his next shift.

As Cullen walked in the circular hallway, his mind drifted. There's nothing of note happening, and any Harrowings weren't scheduled over the next three months. To sum it up, Cullen has a feeling that nothing exciting will be happening again.

Until he felt something, or someone, slam into his back, then stumble to the ground right before regaining his balance and went on running. Cullen pivoted and he fell face first with a surprised 'Oomph.' Whoever hit him is probably nursing a headache, or bruise.

He saw stars for a moment. Who knew metal hurts when you're wearing it?

Waiting for his vision to clear out, Cullen shifted to a kneeling position. He stood up and leaned on the stone walls of the hall, looking at the person that smacked into him. It was an apprentice, who was now unconscious.

Soon enough, metallic footsteps on stone followed, Greagoir's voice barking orders at the other templars. The apprentice was still unconscious when Greagoir laid his eyes on him, and muttering something about 'solitary confinement' and 'another escape attempt'.

Cullen decided it wasn't his business, so he tried to sneak away. Thankfully, no one notices him, and he manages to head over to the library in relative peace and silence. All the while ignoring a few curious mages seeing what the commotion is about.

Not that Cullen is looking for excitement or anything, all he can wish is for is to quietly watch and protect the mages to the best of his ability, aided by the Maker and Andraste. Though, he can't help but feel sorry for a few of the other mages that desire nothing else but freedom…

Stepping inside the library, Cullen walks towards the Templar that he is supposed to relieve –Ser Matheus– and then tapped him on the shoulder.

"You're a little late," Matheus said dryly. His helmet was off, like Cullen's, and his grey eyes are oddly pleased.

"I bumped into someone along the way," Cullen replied.

Grinning, Matheus left and quickly made way for the hall leading to the stairs.

Cullen stood at his post, watching at any signs of Blood Magic and other similar, malicious activities. The destroyed bookcase is now replaced, and the tomes it used to contain are now shelved. The debris and the scratch marks on the floors were gone as well.

He almost blanched when he saw Lirenel looking at him with a raised eyebrow, right before he turned back on his book. The Elf was sitting on one of the chairs near Cullen, surrounded by books stacked. Parchment, blank vellums, charcoal, ink bottles, and quills are scattered across the table.

The next hour was painfully quiet. Cullen tried his best not to fidget; Lirenel's presence was imposing and cold. Perhaps that was why Cullen never mustered the courage to talk to him when he helped the Elf some time ago.

Observing the Mage at a greater distance made the Templar aware of an air of depression that clung to the Elf. His blue eyes were just as cold, like ice. His ears were really sharp, and they twitched at the smallest of noises. Lirenel's skin was is very pale with a grayish hue, sickly even. The Elf's blonde hair is a little long and a little messy, but it did didn't fly in different directions. Lastly, Cullen can't help but notice small red lines on the back of Lirenel's hands.

Cullen frowns. Is he… a blood mage? He hopes that he isn't.

Cullen would gaze around the library, always returning to Lirenel. The apprentice's eyes fast as he reads through books, his fingers swift as he took notes of every page he came across. An hour later, he had a few neatly lined parchments organized in a small pile. Piles of books are stacked as he continues to take notes, cross-referencing each time he pauses while reading.

Six bells chimed a little too early for Cullen's liking, and he wondered why he didn't notice the other two sets before it.

Taking a deep breath, and decided to not leave for a while since Maura still has her lessons, and he cannot meet her. Since there is no one around, as of yet, to take Cullen's post, the Templar gathers as much courage as he can, prays a bit to Andraste and the Maker, and walks towards the Elven Mage.

"You are a friend of Maura, right? I don't think we see much of each other… I'm Cullen by the way." Cullen gave Lirenel a soft smile, which he doesn't seem too keen on returning. He gazed at Cullen head to toe, his lips were curling downwards, but the elf managed to keep his expression blank.

"Good afternoon, my name is Lirenel Surana," the elf replies, his tone flat. He glanced back at his books and began slamming them shut one by one. The elf began piling his notes and arranging his writing materials.

Lirenel pushed his chair back, standing up briskly and pushing the chair back under the table.

"Yes?" the elf deadpanned.

Yes, that is a good question.

"About the other day… Well, er…" Eyes darting around frantically, hoping for an inspiration to strike up a conversation, Cullen's eyes landed on the books Lirinel stacked to return to their cases. "The books weren't… er… ripped or damaged heavily, right?"

Cullen wants to slap himself on the head with his shield, dig a hole, and bury this conversation forever.

The elf raised an eyebrow and his expression remaining flat. Lirenel's ear twitched a bit, then he gathered his materials.

"Thank you for the help. Forgive me if I appear ungrateful, I am still… unused to talking to Templars. Is that all?" Cullen, not knowing what to say, nods.

"Goodbye then." Lirenel gathered his materials and balancing a few tomes with rolled parchments and scrolls on both arms.

Cullen's gaze followed the smaller male, watching him exit the library and turn towards the general direction to Irving's office. Breathing deeply, he marched with heavy footsteps back to the templar quarters to rest a bit before moving on to his next shift.

As the red haired Templar walked, he can't help but feel he will be meeting Lirenel Surana more frequently in the future.