"okay Naruto, Sasuke…" the two teens looked up at Naruto's foster dad "now…I know you two have been going out for a while-"
"eight years, six months and 16 days actually" Sasuke's voice was smug making Naruto beam up at him
"fine…that then, I can tell you won't forget Naruto's birthday"
"nope. Favourite day of the year…" the blonde blushed for some reason
"ahem. Anyway. Now, as you are both getting older, I'm sure you will start to get…needs…" Naruto paled faster then if he saw Orochimaru in a thong. Sasuke bit back a laugh at the comical appearance of his dobe.
"wh-what?!"
"I am sure you are both…attracted to each other and you will start to want to touch each other-" Iruka was cut off by a horrified kitsune
"Dad!"
"no, it's perfectly okay, it's my duty to explain what you need to do. Now. As you are boys, you have penises." Naruto died inside. His face went beat red and he slowly shuffled behind his boyfriend "and when you get…aroused, it goes hard-"
"DAD!"
"no Naruto, you need to know these things." The dolphin said defensively
"b-but we already know…we're 16!" (yep, Sasuke screwed Naruto when they were 8. )
"no! you don't! you are completely innocent and I must explain or you will stay virgins forever!" Iruka blocked out any unwanted voices. Sasuke chuckled. "anyway! Now, as you are both boys you don't have a vagina to insert yourself."
"Daaad!" Naruto whined embarrassedly
"no. let me finish, so you use the person's anus" the blonde dropped his entire body back onto the carpet and began rolling around stubbornly. Sasuke laughed at the image "Naruto, stop being stubborn. Now, you can sexually stimulate someone by touching, rubbing, kissing, lick-" he was cut of by the Uchiha
"I think what Naruto is trying to say is that we are far from virgins, we both took each other's, of course, and that the explanation on sexual intercourse is NOT needed." The brunette blinked. Then blinked again
"no! no you are NOT!" he shouted
"now who's being stubborn?"
"NO! you need an explanation-"
"Iruka. I make love to Naruto every night when you are asleep. There. You can check the sheets. It's covered in 'it'. Now, I am going to make love to my beautiful little uke so good bye" he picked up the stuttering, blushing blonde and put him over his shoulder, walking upstairs. "oh, and we're engaged." Iruka starred
"SASUKE!!" Naruto whacked him over the head and the brown haired chuunin blinked rapidly
"ma, ma, I thought you knew, I heard them every night, I found it a great turn on." The dolphin spun round to see Kakashi reading his porn book
"WHAT?! YOU KNEW?! YOU PERVEEEERT!! RIGHT! NO SEX!!" he screamed, stomping upstairs. The silver haired man's eye widened
"I'M SORRY! I HAD NO IDEA!!"
Kakashi continued pleading and pleading until he got his way as the brunette became horny, against his will, of course, listening to Naruto scream and moan upstairs.
