A/N: My reaction to last night's season finale: Yes! Finally yes! Oh my gosh, best finale yet by far! I now want to go back and watch it a few more times. While I am sad there won't be more episodes until September, I am glad that this is what they left me with. Also, we Caskett writers can write fluff/smut/etc to our heart's content to keep us busy over the break, AND it will actually be canon this time! Anyway, I tried posting this last night before going to bed, but Fanfiction was giving me difficulties logging in. It probably is just as well because there were several typos I missed last night when I was half asleep, which I discovered this morning. This can be considered a two shot, but you guys might be able to convince me to continue if you review nicely. I have some ideas of where this could go if I turned it into a multiple chapter story. Anyway, this is turning into a really long author's note, so I will leave you to read this.
Spoilers: MAJOR spoilers for "Always" the Castle season 4 finale. You have been warned.
Disclaimer: I don't own Castle. It belongs to ABC, Andrew Marlowe, Terri Edda etc. (I couldn't write nearly as brilliantly as Andrew and Terri).
Rain was pouring down as thunder rumbled in the background. Kate found herself walking toward the swings on which she had told Rick that she wasn't ready yet, but would be. She looked at the swing on which he had sat, all those months ago. Where had the time gone?
She knew now, she needed him. On the roof, her last thought had not been of her mother's killer but of the love of her life, Richard Castle. When a strong hand had rescued her from falling, she had hoped with all of her heart that it was Castle. Instead it was Ryan who had turned her and Esposito in to Gates.
As a result of that and her moments to think hanging from the rooftop, she had resigned. She had resigned from the NYPD. A part of her was shocked with this decision. Another part was at peace finally.
There was only one thing, or rather person on her mind right now though. He was a bestselling author and the man she had come to trust more than anyone else. She knew she wanted and needed him.
Suddenly, she found her feet propelling her towards his apartment. She tried calling him along the way, but he didn't answer. She halfway didn't blame him. She had crushed his heart by following the lead on this case after he had begged her not to, laying his heart on the line in the process.
She kept walking though, his lack of response not deterring her.
Drenched, she walked through his lobby, vaguely registering the strange look his doorman gave her. She must look like a drowned rat after all. She definitely looked nothing like her neat, orderly self.
She rode the elevator up to his floor and before she knew it, she was knocking on his door. He opened the door, and all she could do was stare at him, her eyes begging him to let her in, to forgive her.
His response however was less than joyful. "Beckett, what do you want?" he questioned.
The wall gone, all inhibitions having been washed away in the storm, she responded as honestly as she possibly could, "You."
She then crossed the threshold to his apartment and pulled his lips towards hers in a kiss that was long overdue. She felt Castle stiffen in surprise, but still halfway kiss back before she pulled just far enough away to rest her forehead against his.
She then uttered four words which she felt she owed Castle for all she had put him through. "I'm so sorry Castleā¦I'm so sorry." She murmured that phrase several times before she leaned in to kiss him again.
This time the kiss was even briefer. Castle kept her at an arm's length and asked her "What happened?"
Again, telling him the truth and laying it all bare, she told him, "He got away, and I didn't care." The images of the rooftop flashed again through her mind: her falling over the edge, her assailant getting away, what could have been her last thoughts all focusing on Castle, and then finally Ryan rescuing her. It all led to her being here, in Rick's loft, willing to give herself to him. She trusted him with her everything, now it was time to show him. She wanted him. She loved him. And as she spoke, she had never said any truer words than "I almost died and all I could think about was you. All I want is you."
As she leaned in to kiss him again, Rick met her halfway. His lips fused to hers and he pushed her against the door. His mouth nibbled at hers until she opened her lips and their tongues collided. He was all passionate and warm and everything she could have dreamed of in being with Rick Castle. He kissed her neck as she ran her fingers through his hair. She felt him start to unbutton her shirt and felt him trace the scar where the bullet entered her chest, almost killing her. Now, it served as a reminder that she was alive, oh so gloriously alive. She grabbed his hand and held it to her scar, reminding him she was here, in his arms, alive. Even as he traced it with the back of his hand, his lips met hers again. They kissed for a few more seconds before breaking apart and meeting each other's eyes. A smile spread across both of their faces simultaneously as they reached down and grasped hands. Then, hand in hand, they made their way to Castle's bedroom.
From there, clothes were quickly shed. Now that he had her, there was no way Rick was letting her go. He began kissing every inch of skin revealed to him from her neck, to her breasts to her stomach. She practically came undone as he pulled down her panties.
She, however, wasn't inactive. She was busy fumbling with his belt (his shirt already being shed somewhere in his office). Then, Rick stood before her naked, just as she was before him. Four years working together had led them to this point, and she wouldn't have it any other way.
Not being able to stand it any further, she kissed him deeply again, pushing him over to the bed. Rick laid down on the bed, pulling her on top of him as he went, their lips never separating. As they kissed, Rick flipped her over. He broke the kiss, looked at her, with her disheveled wet hair and thoroughly kissed lips and told her "I love you Kate Beckett. I love you so much." She met his eyes, the strength and certainty she felt earlier leading her to be honest with him not failing her now, and told him "I love you too Rick. So much. So so much."
He kissed her then and pushed into her, their bodies becoming one. Nothing had ever felt so right and perfect to Kate. Her heart overflowed with love for this incredible man who had followed her through the worst, almost dyeing for and with her several times. As she came undone in his arms and he in her arms, murmurs of repeated "I love yous" could be heard in the dark.
As they laid together afterwards, Kate's head resting on Rick's chest, Kate whispered a "Thank-you" to Rick.
She felt him kiss her hair and ask "For what?"
She whispered back "For everything. You've been there through it all. It used to scare me how much I needed you Rick. Now, I know you're the only certain thing in my life and I am fine with that. I love you."
He squeezed her a little tighter. "I love you too Katherine Beckett."
As she dozed off, she felt safe and secure, ready to face whatever the next day might bring, as long as Castle was by her side.
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