Everything wrong with

Warriors

Hey! So, I finally got around to uploading something.

Yeah, I feel bad. I've had pretty serious writer's block lately. I went through my folder from my past school year, and found an Everything Wrong with Warriors type of deal and decided to write this. I'm also trying really hard to find inspiration for a one-shot for either Warriors or Percy Jackson. I'm trying!

Please read the bottom author's note. It explains some about how this story is going to work.

P.S. I don't own anything that you may recongnize.

"Hello everybody! I'm your host, Bluestar, and today we are here to discuss the very important topic of 'Everything Wrong with Warriors!'"

Bluestar stood up from her blue chair and walked over to a smartboard. The smartboard was currently displaying the logo of the show.

"See, with more than one author writing the same book series, some things can get forgotten or messed up. That's what we are going to talk about! My co-workers and I have done research in the books and have found a few things we would like to point out. After some of these, I'll call in a few guest stars to voice their opinions on the matter," Bluestar explained.

Bluestar clicked the corner of the smartboard screen and the first slide flashed up. It read 'Spottedleaf'.

"Okay, don't get me wrong, Spottedleaf is a great medicine cat and when she was alive she was great. But, in the books, after she died she was quite terrible and annoying. She was portrayed as a Mary-Sue in the books, and having known her before the books started, she is no Mary-Sue. I would also like to point out the fact that she was a Mary-Sue in a book about cats. Come on,"

"The big issue was the fact that Spottedleaf had what at best could be described as a big crush on Firestar when he was an apprentice. More realistically, it's described as a small crush. Then she feels the need to stick around for the rest of the books, nudging all of the characters on rather unhelpfully. Take the SkyClan books, she was not at all useful in the books," Bluestar peered backstage for a moment.

"Alright, now we're going to call Spottedleaf here and she is going to explain," Bluestar flicked her tail and Spottedleaf appeared in the chair next to the one Bluestar had been previously sitting on.

"Ummmmm where am I?" Spottedleaf said in her annoying sweet voice.

"This is Everything Wrong with Warriors. Welcome to the show. You're guest starring," Bluestar explained, then walked over to her chair. As she neared it, she started coughing. "Spottedleaf, lay off on the perfume, okay?" Bluestar choked out.

"But I smell like strawberries!" Spottedleaf objected.

"Are you sure it wasn't burning monster feet?" Bluestar coughed.

"Just get on with the show!" Spottedleaf exclaimed, exasperated.

After Bluestar briefed Spottedleaf on the topic, Bluestar gave her five minutes to talk about it.

"About the Mary-Sue part, I have a high pitched voice and I smell good. So what? Yeah, I only get in trouble when I'm helping other cats, and I fell in love in a week, but that's not important!" Spottedleaf said.

Bluestar facepawed.

"What?" Spottedleaf asked indignantly.

"That was literally the worst argument I have ever heard. You gave the other side reasons to hate you!" Bluestar yelled.

"But-"

"Just get off the stage."

"I'm not done-"

"Yes you are."

"No-"

Bluestar flicked her tail again and Spottedleaf disappeared.

"Sorry about that! The chatterbox wouldn't shut up! For the record, I think it's true," Bluestar whispered into the camera.

"Anyway, onto the next one!" Bluestar strolled back over to the smartboard.

"Next up is Mistystar's family! That also makes it my family, so you better watch it, authors. Alright, so in the first series, Firestar (who was Fireheart at the time) and Graystripe save Mistystar's (who was Mistyfoot) kits who washed away in the flood. Mistyfoot had four kits. Those kits just sort of… disappeared. It has been confirmed that Reedwhisker is Mistyfoot's son. But, if that is the case, Mistystar showed favoritism when choosing her deputy. However, that is a problem for later. Reedwhisker is a black cat, so he would have to get the genetics somewhere. As far as I know, there have been no black-furred cats in my lineage, so it couldn't have come from my side of the family. Also, the only black-pelted tom in RiverClan at the time of the kits being born was Blackclaw. It is quite commonly known that Mistystar and Blackclaw hate each other. We are also pretty sure that they hated each other before the kits came into play. Therefore, the father still remains a mystery. Now, on to the other three kits. It is rumored that the other kits all died before their first gathering, because that would make sense as to why we never saw them. It has never been confirmed, though, so we don't know," Bluestar finished.

She quickly flicked her tail and Mistystar appeared in the chair.

"Woah!" Mistystar twisted around and did a few karate moves before seeing her mother.

"Oh. Hey, mom," Mistystar said.

"Hello, Mistyfoot. This is Everything Wrong with Warriors and we are discussing the topic of your forgotten family!"

"…Forgotten family?" Mistystar looked confused.

"Yes. Firestar and Graystripe saved your kits. You had four. But, we only know that Reedwhisker is your son. We also don't know who the father is," Bluestar explained.

"Four kits…. Um… Oh dear StarClan, even I don't remember them! How could I not remember my own kits? I'm a terrible mother!" Mistystar wailed. Then she passed out.

"Urrrr, we'll be right back. We're having some… technical difficulties," Bluestar tried to subtly make static noises (It was quite obvious).

"Alright, we're back! To finish off the episode, I would just like to point out something. It's not really a discussion thing," Bluestar cleared her throat.

"Jayfeather's stick. The premise of Jayfeather receiving this stick is a bit weird. Okay, here it goes. Jayfeather's stick was given to him by an old, dead, blind, hairless cat named Rock who's spirit resided is the very same tunnels where Jayfeather's sister faked her death after Hollyleaf, Jayfeather, Lionblaze, and Heathertail all almost died in the underground river after the old, dead, blind, hairless cat did nothing to save them," Bluestar finished.

"That's it for today! But, before we go, I would just like to introduce the crew! We have Mousefur and Longtail manning the cameras. Say hi, guys!"

Mouefur stuck her head into the camera lense.

"I'm only here because I was promised food," Mousefur scowled.

"I'm not blind anymore!" Longtail said cheerily.

"And Leopardstar and Snowfur manning the backstage areas!" Bluestar gestured for them to come out.

They both awkwardly walked over.

Leopardstar stared at the camera, and Snowfur slowly waved. Then they both scrambled off the stage.

"That's it on Everything Wrong with Warriors! Bye!" Bluestar waved as the camera zoomed out.

Reviews are appreciated!

Anyways, if you want to see something talked about in the story, please leave the topic in a review. If you could, lease put the book number and general section of the book in the review also. It could be anything that you have an issue with! I have read all of the books except the manga and the ebooks, so I would appreciate it if you didn't include anything from that.

Thanks for reading!

-XxShadowcat222xX-

(I'm still going to end that way)