Disclaimer: I did not write Twilight.
"No!"

I cringed as Edward's voice thundered from downstairs.

I had been hiding away in Alice's bedroom for the past two days, trying to avoid the subject that I knew was utterly unavoidable.

I regretted asking Alice for her help. I knew she was persistent and stubborn, but clearly I didn't know how persistent and stubborn she could really be.

"Poor Edward," I whispered to myself.

It hurt me physically to see him in so much grief, especially because I knew it was my fault.

"He only wants what's best for me."

"You're right, he does," Rosalie agreed, appearing out of nowhere, and scaring the crap out of me, "but sometimes what's right, and what's logical doesn't always go hand in hand." With that, she walked out not saying another word.

I smiled inwardly, knowing that Rosalie's comment compared to a normal person giving a hug.

Maybe she doesn't hate me.

I though about what Rosalie had said to me, all the while trying to block out Alice's and Edward's screaming from downstairs.

Was she saying that I was right to want Edward to change me?

My thoughts were shattered as the door flew open and Edward walked into the room fuming. His eyes locked on to mine and I could see his pain.

What are you doing? You're going to ruin everything, my head screamed.

A tear trickled down the side of my face as I wondered what to say. I wanted so badly to wrap my arms around his rock hard body, and apologize, but "sorry" just didn't fit.

Before I even noticed, Edward was against me, gracefully wiping my tear away with a flick of his icy hand. It reminded me of the time that seemed so long ago when he had tasted one of my tears. At that thought, I started crying more.

How could I put him through so much suffering over my own selfish desires?

I wrapped my arms around his neck and buried my face into his chest. Muffled by tears, words began spilling out of my mouth before I could gather my thoughts.

"I love you. I love you. Oh god, I'm so sorry. Please, I'm such an ass. Forgive me. I'm sorry. I love you. Edward, please --"

Placing an icy finger over my lips, Edward silenced my hysteria. "Stop it, Bella. You're acting irrationally. You know I love you, and I'm not going to leave you over something so…so…"

I'd never seen him so lost for words.

I knew this was stupid, but our relationship depended on it.

My thoughts wondered as I tried to picture Edward and I twenty years from now. Of course we would get looks and stares. It's not every day you see a forty-year-old woman holding hands with a seventeen-year-old boy. But that was the least of my worries. What was going to happen when I became an old lady, lying on my deathbed? There's no way I could bare to see Edward's anguish as he watched me leave him forever and realized that it is too late for him to do anything to stop it.

"Bella. Bella, are you okay?" Edward snapped me back from my daydream, no, my day-mare.

"Y-yeah, I think so," I said hesitantly.

"I wish I knew what you were thinking," Edward said sighing, blowing his heavenly scent into my nostrils.

"If you knew what I was thinking you wouldn't be saying that," I said sternly.

"I don't know what to do with you," Edward whispered.

I could tell Alice was really getting to him, but was that what I wanted? Of course it was. The real question was, is putting Edward through all of this really worth and eternity of happiness with him?

Yes, I assured myself, yes it was worth it.