This fic was written for THE GAZEBO FIC CHALLENGE: The Essence of Charlie Swan
- Prompts used: 1 & 2

Please see the C2 - THE GAZEBO FIC CHALLENGE: The Essence of Charlie Swan for more fics in this competition.

------------------------------

A/N: After already writing my piece for this competition (Truism, Daughters, and the Gray Shades Surrounding) I got bored. Then I started thinking... what about Billy Black writing a poem about his BFF, Charlie Swan. His ~poetic stylings~ touch on the fore-mentioned prompts and lots of non-srs-bsns in between. Billy Black is not only down with the kids, he likes to write poetry. Now you know.

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight

------------------------------

The Essence of Charlie Swan - An Original Poem By Billy Black

---

A man en-flanneled, Charlie Swan

To work or fish, man's up at dawn

Vit'min R trumps A through Zinc

He cares not what the doctors think

His 'stache is kind of a big deal

Choice salutation: 'keep it real'

As his B F F, I write

In verse, on him, to shine a light

Not unlike me, this poem is split

There's dancin', and there's pensive shit

Parts of what I will convey

are light, carefree, sound kind of gay

Now other things between us two

They've darkened, and obscured whats true

But here's the good news, 'fore the bad

That's mostly what our likes have had

La Push Beach, with kids still small

Cook-outs, road trips, watching ball

Years unrolled like camping gear

Like that! His daughter reappears

I sold my truck to my good man

It went to Bells, "my pleasure m'am"

To his delight, truck's loud and slow

That engine starts, whole town will know

Hooked up his she-klutz with a tank

"It's sturdy", with a wink, I'm thanked

Steer clear of she-Swan, don't be fooled

Your van be skiddin? You'll get schooled

Kiss that license 'bye', you can!

Endanger Bells? ENRAGE THE MAN!

If he only knew how close-

Real danger does trig at his house

I use his flat-screen, thats trufax

Sometimes we drive to tjmaxx

Shoppin's hell, with Swan it's ease

Plus tubes socks don't just grow on trees

Side by side, inside my boat

He'll compliment my fleecy coat

This is because my coats the bomb

But still, it's nice to hear from Swan

We go way back, shit, it does show

Not one fact 'bout Swan that I don't know

Youngsters drunk (spiked lemonade)

As teens, my hair, once Chuck did braid

Well, Charlie here has 'bout four friends

The cause for that, I guess, depends.

The fellow fuzz are fond of Chuck

But mixing work and play, no luck

The ladies on the reservation

Their lashes bat, sans hesitation

Despite his bachelor situation

His heart's in perma-preservation

And Jake here wants to date his Bella

But she's into that cold-one fellah

Chief trusts the Cullens, but whatevz

We can't all know tales from the rez

Some part of him can surely tell

that they're not Alaskan, but from hell

Charlie shrugs, "the boys ok"

The truth may mean her life one day

I do detect it in his voice

He's left things up to 'Bella's choice'

Now Bells, naïve, in Steinbeck stuck,

In charge? Now Charlie, What the fuck?

Twas simpler to distrust Renee

Least then, I was allowed my say

And all I suffered - one black eye

A punch means beans from lovesick guys

Someday I may set Bella straight

Not now, cause shit, game's on at 8

When we go fishin, now jokes fall flat

I know to blame that 'boy' for that

Instead, he's somber, brow stays creased

Though small, his world is not at peace

Distractions hardly ever work

Lest both our fishing rods do jerk

Fruitful catches thaw his mood

But freshwater bounty's only food

"Our haul! Up to our necks in fish!"

But fish-wealth's not Chuck's current wish

No more is said, for all is clear

I let it drop, head towards the pier

And I, I try, to keep my cool

Fish-fry, blind-eye, my trademark tools

I've known the chief since primary school

And he, like me, is no man's fool

I hope and pray conditions change

His girl delivered from such strange

Creature, demons - wish them gone

If only to help Charlie Swan