Drugs make everything better :
Okay, so I decided to make a second part, do you guys could know what happens to Frank and Gerard and Kym afterwards, so, enjoyyy!:3
Part Two.
It really pissed me off; the fact that there was only about 25 people at Ari's funeral. Her mum turned up about half an hour late, and she was comepletely pissed out of her mind. I just hoped she was pissed to drown out the feelings of her daughters death, but that obviously wasn't the reason. Ben was there, he came and sat next to me, Kym and Gerard. We were at the front, with a few others that I'd never seen before, but Kym told me they were family on Kyms side. It also pissed me off that there was only that many people there to support Kym, no-one really cared that she was gone. Me, Kym and Gerard, like, designed the funeral, kinda. We chose the coffin and the church and the songs that were played and the flowers and all that shit. Her coffin was black with metal handles, and it was over-the-top-shiny, seeing as it was going to be covered in dirt soon. We also picked out the grave-stone. It was black with a bat spreading it's wings on the top. On it, it said : 'Here lies Ari. 1982-1997. She will be deeply missed, so long and goodnight.' then the chorus to 'Working Class Hero' by John Lennon, which was her favorite song. Us three wanted to put a joint and a weed leaf at the bottom (carved into it) but the vicar wouldn't let us. Stupid vicar. Myron and all turned up, but only to laugh at her, and us four (including Ben) because we were crying. Well, I was exactly crying. Sure, I was really sad and I was gonna miss her so fucking much, but I also wasn't that sad, because I know she's so much happier now. And that made me slightly happier, I guess. Me, Gerard, Kym, Ben and two guys from the church carried her coffin to the car, that would take her up to the grave-yard. 'It just doesn't seem real, at all. She looked to still, and un-Ari like in that coffin. It made her look too.. small' Gerard said to me, wiping his eyes then resting his head on my shoulder, burying his face into my black coat. 'I know. Fuck, I'm gonna miss her so much' I said, and I could feel my voice slightly breaking, and the ball of tears start to roll around in my throat. I started blinking rapidly to stop the tears from spilling over the brim of my outlined, hazel eyes. 'Its all gonna be okay Gee, I promise' I said, and rubbed his back, then kissed him on the top of his head. He's dyed his hair black, I think it was in memory of Ari, but I kinda miss his blonde hair..Kind of. He just carried on crying.
The car finally pulled up to the yard, and that's when I realised that it was only me, gerard, ben, kym and kyms dad and myron and her weird 'we-think-were-really-hard-and-pretty' group. That really pissed me off. I watched as Ari was lowered slowly six-feet under, and that's when I couldn't hold it in anymore, and the tears rolled down my cheeks. Two years worth of locked-up tears started spewing down my cheeks, rolling at a very quick pace. Gerard wrapped his arms around me from behind and kissed me on the head. I could feel his tears drip onto my hair, and that's when I just couldn't keep them quiet anymore. Weird chokey noises escaped my mouth and I spun round and dug my face into Gerards what-seems-like-forever-ly warm chest, and then my whole body started shaking and rocking, causing Gerards body to move slightly, but not as much as Ari's had when Kym lay on her crying. 'Frank, fucking promise me right here, right now, you will never leave this world on purpose..Fuck that, AT ALL, Okay?' he whispered loudly in my ear, which just ended with me crying even harder. 'I p-p-pr-promise Gee' I managed to spit out. For fuck sake, I always look a whole lot worse after I cry, which is why I hate crying. I also hate crying because it shows weakness. 'Good.' he said sternly and planted another kiss on my head, but leaving his lips there for a couple seconds more. I heard someone walking over and wiped my eyes, trying to clean myself up. It turned out to be Ben, who had tears dripping off his chin, and he wasn't trying to hide it all, he looked like he didn't give a fuck if people saw him spewing his heart out of his eyes. 'H-hey guys' he said with a weak, stuttery voice. 'Hi' we replied. 'Fuck, I knew she was depressed and suicidal, and I knew she'd tried it before, but I just never...I guess, I never really wanted to think about her like this, so I guess I kinda pushed that memory out of my head. Just.. fuck, I'm gonna miss her so much' he said, completely breaking now and covered his face with his hands and just stood there, swaying back and forth with the violent-ness behind his tears. Ben was wearing a button-up green and black checked shirt ontop of a plain black top, black skinnies and blue and black air-walks. 'Alright, well I'll see you around, I've got to go home. See you in abit' he said as he walked away, I could still hear him crying. Kym came over to us and gave us both about 15 billion hugs each (like, literally) and then explained how she was staying at her dads tonight, so she had to go. Myron and that douche-bag group walked past us, smirking and laughing because they'd spat on her grave. Literally, after the vicar and everyone had gone, they went up to her grave-stone and coughed-up on it. I just wanted to pick up the nearest rock and smash their heads in with it, but I wouldn't do that...Not today anyway. Me and Gerard went to sit with Ari (well, her grave) for abit. We cleaned the spit off it, and picked a few white and pink flowers from the bush just next to her grave, and placed them over the freshly filled-in dirt. 'Fuck Ari, I'm gonna miss you so much..' Gerard said, a few more tears spilling down his cheeks. 'How could you leave us like this?' he said, jokingly rasing his voice like he always did, and then we both went silent, like we were waiting or listening out for her laugh, which never came, and that made us both cry even more. 'Ari, I just.. a-a-at leas-st your free from A-a-adrian and your mum now. Nothing can hurt you anymore, and you can be with your dad again' I stuttered. Me and Gerard were both sat crossed legged, but he was sat behind me and I was resting on him. It was a reasonably warm but cloudy day. And as me and Gerard sat there, talking to Ari, the skies opened up and rain tumbled down on us. 'I think this is Ari's way of saying "Stop fucking crying, for god sake. Go get stoned, you morons"' Gerard laughed. It wasn't really a laugh. It was more of a breath through a smile. 'Ha, yeah' I replied, and lazily laid down, head in Gerards lap. He started running his hands through my hair, that I washed before I went to Gerards to leave with Kym and her dad. 'So, shall we go mine and get stoned? Try and forget about today, and everything.' Gerard said, looking down at me with breath-swiping eyes. 'Yeah, sure' I said and rolled out of his lap and stood up. My little getting-up mission made Gerard laugh, and I knew if Ari was here, she would be laughing, like, hysterically. I placed my hand on the left side of the bat, whispered 'see you tomorrow, sis. Love you and miss you already' and then placed my hand in Gerards and we left, with tear-stains still on our cheeks.
Even with all the pot we smoked and all the booze we drank, the pain and sadness wouldn't leave. We tried fore-play, kissing and talking to dirty to eachother and shit, but it just didn't feel right without Ari there. We were even listening to John Lennon and using the bongs that Ari left for us. 'We should probably get some sleep, I just want today to fucking end and never return' he said, taking his jeans and jacket off, so he was stood in front of me in his boxers and 'Metallica' top. I did the same, except I was in boxers and a 'Misfits' top. We both wriggled under the duvet and curled up next to eachother. I curled up into a small ball into Gerards chest, and he wrapped his arms around me, then bought his knee's up, kind of like he was protecting me from the world. 'Goodnight, beautiful. I love you' he said, and kissed me on the fore-head. 'I love you too, Gee' I said, and wiggled my face into his chest until I was comfy. And we both fell asleep, stoned, pissed and heart-broken as fuck.
I woke up in the morning half hanging off the bed, half still in our tangle of legs. Gerards face was smushed-up against the wall, with his mouth dangling open his arms out-stretched. I manouvered myself back into bed and under the covers with disrupting Gerards obviously deep sleep. I shut my eyes again, and that's when I heard Gerard mumble 'what time is it?' and roll over to face me. 'Umm, about 10, maybe 11' I said, completely guessing. It could be half three in the afternoon for all I know. 'Good, a cple mre urs sleep' he slurred, and wrapped me back up in his arms and drifted off to sleep again. I felt comfy and warm, and I didn't have to be anywhere, so I joined him in sleep. That time I dreamed of me, Kym and gerard sitting in kyms room. Then Ari walked in, and said her usual line of 'so, do you wanna get stoned, or high or..' but then she started crying. But she wasn't crying, it was blood dripping down her cheeks, and then she fell to the floor, suddenly drowning in a pool of her own blood. And then Kym and Gerard were gone, and Ari was crying out my name, begging me to help her, but whenever I moved, I wasn't moving.. It's like I was chained down onto the bed. And then that's when her breathing cut off and she died, but she was still staring at me with her open mouth and blood stained cheeks, and blood started pouring out of her mouth. I made myself wake up from this dream, only to find Gerard sat over me, rubbing my arm gently. Turns out, it was him that had woken me up. 'Frank, Ive been saying your name trying to get you to wake up for about twenty minutes now, you started crying and shouting in your sleep. I was fucking worried sick 'cause you werent responding to anything I was saying' he said, wiping my eyes. 'I just had a dream about Ari..It was really... disturbing' I said pushing him down and curling into him. 'Well, its okay now. No more creepy mental pictures of Ari' he said. We all had pictures of Ari. Gerard had about four, actually no, five. One of just Ari laughing, one of just Ari with a spliff in her mouth, one of him and Ari, one of me and him and Ari, and then one of all of us (me, him, kym and ari). My favorite was the last one. We were sat on the grass down park, all crossed legged and smiling, with doobies in our mouths. Ari was in the middle of me and Gerard, and kym was on the end next to me. Gerard had his arm around Ari and she had her head resting on his shoulder, whilst Kym was holding my hand and the other hand flipping the camera off. It was only then that I realised that it was the last picture we had taken with Ari, and I could feel my eyes well up again. I had about ten. Most of them (about five) were of me and Ari, the rest were of us four altogether, I also had one with Ben in it. Kym had most of them though.
On Moday, school was pretty much hell again without Ari. A couple of people actually blamed me for her death, which made me well up and hide my face, or just hug Gerard and Kym as hard as possible. At break and lunch, us three didn't really talk, at all. And I used to sit next to Ari in every lesson apart from Art, she was..used to be in the same class as Gerard for Art, so I sat next to Kym. Her name hadn't been taken off the registers yet, either. The worse part of that was I kept expecting to hear her voice to reply lazily to the teacher, so I always waited, and then got really depressed and sad and felt kind of lonely when she didn't reply. In Art (we have double Art on Mondays) the teacher just sleeps and lets us get on with drawing whatever the fuck we wanted. I got a text off Gerard in Art, it said "Fuck, it's so weird without Ari here, we'd normally be drawing eachother and talking about random shit by now, I just..fuck, I think I'm gonna cry. do you reckon you and Kym would be able to get out of lesson for like ten minutes, my teachers asleep and everyone keeps making comments about Ari and yeah. Do you reckon you can? xx"
'Hey, Kym, do you wanna go meet Gerard, he feels like he's about to cry because everyone keeps saying stuff about Ari...'
'Yes! Lets go meet him.' she said, cutting me off at Ari's name. Her eyes had started watering, and she hadn't rolled her sleeves up like she always does, to protect her precious 'The Midnight Beast' jumper from the pencils and paints. "Yeah, were leaving now, be at the toilets in like, five minutes xx" I texted to Gerard. And when we reached the toilets five minutes later, Gerard was standing there, leaning against the wall staring at his phone with his ear phones in. I ran up to him and wrapped my arms around him, kissing him on the shoulder. "Hey baby" he said, kissing me on the forhead and removing his earphones. I let go of our little embrace and sheepishly said "hi" back. Kym gave him a hug, and he kissed her on the top of her head, but he had to bend right down because she's really short. She's 16 and 4ft 9, which is a tiny bit smaller than me. We just stood there talking until we all felt better, then went back to lessons.
At the end of the day Gerard and Kym told me they weren't coming in tomorrow. "But guys, you have too! I'm not allowed the day off!" I said, I was already in a really shit, depressed mood, and this only made it worse. "Just bunk off then" Kym said, like it was the easiest thing in the world to do. "Guys, the school phone your parents if your not in by 9" school starts at 8:30, if your wondering. "Frank, just take the day off, it will be fine!" Gerard said placing his hand on my elbow. "No, I'm not fucking bunking off. The school will ring my mum and then when I get home she'll just hit me. Hope you have fun tomorrow." I said, and walked off. I could hear them calling me, but I didn't turn around, I just wanted to get home and cut. Seriously, I wasn't gonna kill myself, I just wanted to cut. Simple. I ran in the door and threw my shoes off, not caring where they went. I trailed up to my room and threw my stuff on the floor by my wardrobe. I walked over to the cd player and blasted Iron Maiden as loud as my ears could take. Then I paced over to my bed, sat on it and pulled the blood stained razor from beneath my pillow. I rolled my sleeves up (oh, by the way, my cuts had healed now) and ran the blade across my fore arm with lots of pressure and alot of speed. I honestly didn't care where the blood dripped, I can handle with that later. I carried on until there was about half a centimetre gap between the newly made fifteen cuts, blood slipping down my arm and dripping onto my sheets, creating a pattern of deep red splodges. I placed the blade back under my pillow and wiped my arm with the duvet. I law there studying my arm. I reached over to a draw next to my bed and rolled myself a lovely, fat joint. I ignited the end and breathed in and out. Suddenly, my room went deathly cold, and I felt like I was being watched, but, honestly, I wasn't scared because I had a weird feeling that it was Ari. "Hey Ari" I said out loud. I felt my bed sink slightly a little at the end of my bed, and in my head I could Ari reply to me, with her voice that I missed so fucking much. I started crying, and I couldn't stop. I didn't even notice I was crying until her voice echoed around in my head saying 'Frank, your know your crying, right bro?' and my face went absolutly freezing, and then I wiped my eyes. Me and 'Ari' had a conversation for what felt like forever, and then she 'said' "Goodbye, I love you so fucking much bro, and please, instead of ever hurting yourself, just think of us and how happy we were. Remember the good memories!" and then my room slowly turned warm again.
The next day of school was fucking torture. I got beaten up again because Gerard and Kym weren't there to protect me. And because I hadn't been beaten up for ages, I got kicked and punched and slammed into lockers, a couple of people decided to pour hot coffee on my hands, and someone grabbed my arms and went over my new cuts with a pair of fucking blunt scissors. A few people put their fags out on me, too. When English came around, I just sat there with my earphones in reading the notes people were throwing at me. This is what it said on those notes:
- 'Kill yourself.'
- 'Your the reason Aris dead.'
- 'Murderer.'
- 'Fucking homo.'
- 'Lol, faggot.'
- 'Go home and kill yourself. Why dont you overdose like Ari did?'
But it was the last one that really, REALLY pissed me off. 'I think its a good thing Aris dead. One less fucking ugly-ass emo wanna-be that self harms in the world. Thank fuck. Hopefully youll go next, yeah?' It wasn't the bit about me that pissed me off. It was just the 'One less fucking ugly-ass emo wanna-be that self harms in the world. Thank fuck.' It pissed me off so much, I did something about it. I knew who sent it. Georgia's sister (the one that bullied Ari) comes to this school and is in my english class. 'Ria-Mother-Fucking-Stapleton.' I called, standing up. She stood up too, cocked her head to the side, put her hands on her hips and smiled at me. 'Yeah?' she said in an innocent voice. I was getting more and more pissed off with her as the seconds seemed to take a millenium to tick by. 'It's a good thing Ari's dead, is it?' I asked. 'Yes.' she replied. 'Oh, well, that's your opinion.' 'And pretty much everyone elses in the class, right?' she said, a big smile spreading across her face, and a sick, sadistic evil glare creeping into her eyes. 'Well then, maybe it would be better for the world to have one less ugly, slutty, dumb, brain dead whore in the world aswell.' I spat back at her, a full mouth of venom being thrown towards her. The whole class kind of gasped, and then a few 'Ohhh!'s and laughs filled the silent room. Ria's cheeks had started to turn a steady red, and tears were slowly building up behind her eyes. 'Why arent any of you guys fucking helping me?!' she said, looking at all the jocks and other stick-thin porn star wanna-be friends for back up. 'Well, now whos got no friends? No-ones stepping up to help you. You need to learn to fight for own battles, bitch.' I said, crossing my arms and a slight smile creeping onto my face this time. I knew Ari would be proud of me. If she was here, she would be saying some random shit like "Oh bitch, you just got tollllddddd!" and waving her arms around whilst standing next to me. I laughed slightly at that hilarious mental picture that was building in my head. Aw, now I want Ari here. 'Well, MY best friends still alive.' she said, trying to nurse her dying reputation as 'cool' back to life. 'Yeah, my best friend is dead.' I said, only just seriously realising as I said it. Shit. My best friend is dead. Fuck. 'Well me and my best friend meet up after school and laugh about how pathetic and what a waste of space Ari was.' she said. 'Hey! I don't laugh at Ari's death! She was actually quite a nice person! Don't start bullshitting about me right in front of my face!' her 'best friend' said. Ha, that's quite funny actually. I sat back down watching in awe at what I had done. Eveyone had started to gang up on Ria. Some people had even got their phones out and had started filming it. Ha did you get what you deserve, bitch? Yes, I think so. The end of day bell rang and I was the first person to walk out of the door, and towards the school gates. I decided to go round to Gerards. I knocked on the door a few times and no one answered, so I tried it to see if it was unlocked, and it was so I walked in, leaving my shoes, bag and jacket at the bottom of the stairs. 'Hello?' I called. No answer. I wandered up the stairs to Gerards room. 'Hello, Gerard?' I said as I pushed open the door. Gerard was sat on the edge of the bed with a knife in his arm. And yes, I mean IN his arm. Tears were flooding down his face and mixing in with the blood, causing the red, watery liquid to plummit to the floor with a quiet dripping noise. I ran over to him. I wanted to fucking slap him across the face. He made me promise not to kill myself, and here he was, with A FUCKING KNIFE IN HIS WRIST. 'GERARD WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!?' I shouted at him, shaking him. 'Frank? I-i-i-I just, um, I just..'
'JUST WHAT? TRIED TO KILL YOURSELF?' I said, I'd stopped shaking him, but now my body had started shaking. It wasn't that deep, I mean not deep enough to have to go to hospital, but still pretty deep. 'No I, I just..' he said, his voice cracking and he was about to start crying until I pushed our lips together. 'Please, just get that fucking thing out of your arm, now' I whispered, resting my forhead on his. He pulled the knife out and I took my t-shirt off and wrapped it around his arm. 'But, your shirt will have my blood on it now..' he said. 'I DON'T FUCKING CARE ABOUT THE TOP! I just want you to be okay' I said. 'It needed a wash, anyway' I said, trying to make the tension in the air less.. tension-y. He smiled a little. I tied the top so it stayed in place and sat on his bed next to him, and I threw the knife in the bin. 'I'll get rid of it properly later' I said. 'Why baby? Please, just tell me why you felt like you needed to hurt yourself.. Even try and kill yourself? Would you really do that to me and kym? Right now, after whats just happened?' I said. 'Well, I, I just thought...' he said, his voice trailing off to nothingness. 'Just thought what, Gee?' I said, my voice all calm and caring. 'I just, thought you hated me' he said, and his eyes started watering. What? He thought I hated him? 'Are you fucking dumb? Seriously.. Just, REALLY Gerard?' I said, throwing my arms around his neck, digging my face into the side of his head. 'I would never hate you. How could I? YOU are the only reason I'm still fucking alive!' I said. He had his face buried in my neck, so his next words were muffled. 'Just, after yesterday, cause you walked away from me and kym...'
'Gerard Arthur Lee Way, I love you, and I would be dead if it wasn't for you. I would do anything to keep you safe. I'd make a pile of a thousand bodies if it would make you smile. I would get rid of anything in this world that makes you.. or had EVER made you upset. I fucking love you, baby' I said, and kissed him on the temple, then his cheek, then finally his lips. When we broke from the kiss, he said 'I love you too Frankie.' He must've been thinking the exact same thing as me, cause then he said 'Three cheers for sweet Frerard' and we both smiled. 'Fuck, I miss Ari so much' he said. 'Hey, you know what she'd be like if she found out about this...meaning your arm.' I said, knowing that she would probably start crying. 'Yeah, now I feel really bad, thanks Frank.' he said jokingly. 'Good.' I said and wrapped him up in my arms.
I stayed at Gerards that night.
School was easier the next day. Kym was in, we all kind of still recovering though.
Saturday came faster then we all expected. Kym and Gerard stayed round mine, and we got heavily stoned. "I remember when you asked to Ari to stay yours, Frank. I remember how happy she was because we were getting her out of that place. She thanked you so much, I honestly didn't realise she was that depressed.' Gerard said mournfully, whilst we were sat in my room eating Mcdonalds. It's weird, I'm supposed to be vegetarian but I've eaten shit loads of Mcdonalds recently. "Yeah, wasn't it, like, the weekend before she.. yeah. You were staying at your dads Kym. Her eyes literally lit up, and she didn't stop saying thank-you... She also beat the shit out of Alex" I said, smiling a little remembering that last bit. "Please, can we stop talking about her. I just want to fucking forget that she isn't here anymore. You know what? I'm going. I want to go home. See you in abit guys.' she said, grabbed her stuff and walked out. "Fuck! Well, I wasn't expecting that to happen!" Gerard said, his eyes wide and mouth hanging open a little. "Yeah, I guess she's really hung up over Ari" I said, nodding. I laid down and rested my head in his lap, looking up at him. "You know Gee, you're so fucking beautiful" I said, and started stroking his leg. "Don't Frank, don't lie so blatantly to my face, please" he said. "I'm not lying!" I said, sitting up and sliding my hand just under the waistband of his jeans. "Oh, hey there Frankie!" he said, pulling me in closer, so I was sat on his lap with my legs wrapped around him. "Heey" I said and kissed him dirtily. "So, are we gonna..." he breathed when we broke from the kiss. "Yes, we are gonna" I said with a wink and un-did his jeans. I rubbed his balls through his boxers, causing him to moan slightly. He removed my jeans and pulled me back on the bed, laying me down and hovering over me, kissing me and running one hand down my chest and the other holding him up. His free hand travelled down to my dick and he slipped it under my boxers and started rubbing me off. I shut my eyes and started panting and moaning and running my hands down his back and grabbed his ass. He stopped rubbing me and moved his hand. I opened my eyes and was about to tell him off for stopping, but then he put his fingers in my mouth and I knew what he wanted me to do. I covered them in a thick layer of spit and rolled onto my side, pulled my boxers down and lifted my knee slightly, and as he pushed the first finger a small moan escaped my mouth. He pushed another finger in, and he started stretching me out. 'Oghhh, fuck, yess' I moaned. When he felt I was wide enough, he took his fingers out and reached in his draw for a bottle of baby oil. He slicked himself and laid next to me and pushed himself in. He kept going until he was fully in, and then he drew out and pushed in again. He was nipping at the skin on the neck, and I could feel him breathing heavily and mumbling words like 'fuck' and 'oh god'. He reached one hand around finished doing what he started earlier. The pleasure was just so fucking.. pleasurable. The entoxiating feeling from his dick in my ass and rubbing me off was so fucking good, I came faster then normal, all over Gerards big, soft hands and a little on the sheets. He had sped up now, and he had started panting and saying 'fuck' over and over, until he finally said 'oh god, oh myy, ugh, Frank, just, oh fuck, fuck, yeah, ugh, Frank' and came inside of me. He carried on until it got to sensitive and pulled out slowly. I'm guessing he wanted to hear a few more little moans out of me before he was fully out. We lay there for about five minutes, smoking and holding hands and talking. It was only about ten, but we were so fucking worn out by our little sex scene, we fell asleep.
The day to collect bits of Ari's stuff that we wanted suddenly turned up. We were at Ari's...Kyms by about 11:30 (we skipped school, fuck what my parents do) and we trudged sadly up the stairs to her old room. We looked through boxes and piles, and draws and cupboards. Me, kym and gee split her drugs, she also left us an address to a guy who gives you stuff for half price if you were close to Ari, he asks questions about her that only she and her closest friends know. And as we were looking through a draw, we found three notes. One was for me, one was for kym and one was for gerard. Kym and gerard read theirs kyms room. I didn't want to read mine infront of them, so I excused myself and went to the bathroom to it. Mine said:
'Hey Frankie, I know your not reading this in front of those guys.
I need you to look after Kym and Gerard for me, I know you can. I'm asking you because I know you are the strongest. You might not think it, but trust me, you are. You are my best friend, and in the short time I really got to know you, I think I've figured you out. And no matter what you think, your beautiful. The world is fucking ugly sometimes, but YOU are beautiful to me. And as well as looking after Kym and Gee, you need to stay strong. Be strong and hold my hand, time becomes for us you'll understand. We'll say goodbye today, and we're sorry how it ends this way. Frankie, I don't care what you think of yourself, because I know that you are fucking perfect. Remember the good memories, forget the bad. You're not alone. Your never alone, because I will always be there with you. I fucking love you Frank Anthony Iero, Stay Strong, Keep Running and NEVER let them take you alive. - XO Ari:) P.S. whenever you miss me, smoke some weed;) Oh, and Im always with you, more than kym and gee, cause YOU are my BESTEST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD AND I LOVE YOU SO FUCKING MUCH YOUR LIKE MY BRO AND I always felt really safe and comfortable around you which is weird cause I have really bad trust issues, and yeah. Anyway, I fucking love you bro...Thank You:3 There's one thing they'll never take from you.'
When I finished reading it, a few tears escaped my eyes, and I kept repeating the words 'be strong and hold my hand' and 'Your never alone'. Ari thinks I'm the strongest. Is she fucking stupid? How can I look after Gee and Kym when I can't even look after myself? Well, if Ari thought it, it must be true.. maybe...possibly...I don't even fucking know. I strode back into Kyms room and Gerard and Kym were sat on Ari's bed crying into eachother, both holding their notes tightly in their hands. I waked over to them and wrapped my arms around. 'Its okay guys, I'll look after you' and I just knew Ari would be smiling, one of her massive, teeth-bearing smiles that sort of placed itself onto your lips before you have time to think about it.
I read Gerard's and Kym's notes. Gerard's said:
'Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey Geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Listen, I fucking love you, man. I've known you for ages, you are one of my best friends. I'm sorry how it ends this way, but there's really nothing going for me right now. I wasn't afraid to keep on living, but I just couldn't take it anymore. I'm so sick and tired of all the needless beating. Think happy thoughts, though! Whenever your sad or lonely, just remember I LOVE YOU! And you are one of the nicest, hottest, funniest, perfect-est guys ever! Stay strong and be happy! Don't worry about a thing, 'cause every little thing, is gonna be alright! Stay beautiful, keep it ugly. Listen, the world is gonna try and clean you up, it's gonna try and make you pretty, what the fuck you gonna do about it? You're gonna say, I wanna stay ugly. And I'm gonna sing about it! Keep Running bro, I love you! ~ Arrrrrrriiiiiii:3!x'
And Kyms said:
'Kym, please, don't hurt yourself anymore. I really, really HATE seeing you in pain. You are so beautiful, Kymothy. If I could be with you tonight, I would sing you to sleep, never let them take the light behind your eyes. You are my sister. I'm sorry how it ends this way. You have always been there for me, and I've always been there for you. Now it's time for you to stand up on your own two feet, and be incredibly strong, because one day someone's going to try and use you as their doomsday device, and do you know what your gonna say? You're gonna say you cannot destroy me! And no matter what anyone says, don't take their fucking bullshit. Because you're better then them, you're faster than them, and god damnit, you are MUCH better looking. Stay beautiful, keep it ugly. Keep listening to music, it gets you through everything, I promise. If it looks like I'm laughing I'm really just asking to leave. You can run away with me anytime you want. Every snowflake is different, just like you. Was you really listening? Because I'm telling you the truth, I mean this! I'm okay! Trust me, I'm not okay. I'd end my days with you, in a hail of bullets. She's an extra-ordinary girl, in an ordinary world. And though your dead and gone believe me, your memory will carry on. From the earth to the morgue. And most importantly, I AM NOT AFRAID TO KEEP ON LIVING, I AM NOT AFRAID TO WALK THIS WORLD ALONE. I love you so much Kymberley Sarah Watson, but I can't help but think I'll die alone. ~ Ari, your sister, forever and ever. :3xxxx 3 xxxx'
Ari truly was the best friend anyone could want, in the world. She was kind and funny and pretty and such an awesome person. Rest In Peace. I'm gonna miss her so much. Me, kym, gee and Ben will. But now I have to stay strong, hold Ari's hand and march forward with Kym, Gee and Ben. Altogether in the Black Parade.
So long and goodnight Ari, sis.
