Author's Note: Hi. Well, this is my first story. And yeahh. Lemme know what you think. Just so yall know I am Team Switzerland :) I was truly inspired by My friend Ihatejacob1 you should go check her out if you wanna read a real writer's work. :) Be honest lemme know what you think.

Ihatejacob1: Hi I'm Jazmine's beta. And I say read this and like it or I will stalk you in the night ^ ^ enjoy.

Edward's POV

As I lay there buried in the snow, buried in my thoughts, I think of

her. Her beautiful brown hair, her chocolate colored eyes, and her smell

of lavender. The look that dawned on her perfect, heart shaped face when she saw me… I shook my head feverently trying to shake away the thoughts of her.

Isabelle Marie Swan.

I'm with Tanya now. Don't get me wrong I loved Tanya, but just, never the way I loved Bella. My deep feelings for the seemingly insignificant human, could never add up to the miniscule feelings I held for another immortal such as myself. I heard Tanya's thoughts coming closer, and snapped out of my reverie. Putting on a happy face, and hiding away the sheer agony I had to bear.

"Hello Love," she giggled, my heart stayed still. If that had been Bella, I was sure it would have jumped to life. "I didn't frighten you did I?" She asked jokingly, my cheek turned up in a weak smile.

"Of course not." I answered, softly, she'd been so elated when I came to Alaska to live with the Denali Coven. I had run away. Run away like a coward. Like the lowlife I was. I tried to suppress those thoughts. Tanya didn't deserve this emotional unfaithfulness, she loved me and I loved her. At least…that's what I told myself.

That's the way it was always supposed to be. You can't go against nature. I will have to learn to live without Bella. Just like she learned to live without me. As I travelled deeper and deeper into thought, Tanya noticed something was bothering me.

"What's wrong?" she asked with a concerned overtone dominating her golden eyes; not brown. Just like…me. What was I going to give her

now?

"Nothing" I all but choked out, "just thinking about how beautiful you are." I wasn't lying…completely. She really was beautiful, in an undying way. I hated having to hide my thoughts about Bella. What made her beauty special, was that it shifted every second with the fluctuating human anatomy. But, if I told Tanya, I know what that would do to her. It would destroy her. I could read her thoughts, to say she was worried was a blunt understatement.

I hope he's ok… she mused internally.

"I'm fine. No need to worry about me" I said smoothly, to soothe her; I was a good liar- fortunately. I'd made it seem like I was alright, when truly inside I was dying. If that's what we do.

I try to stay away, but my strength is withering away, like its slipping out of my fingers like sand; my subconscious is screaming the knowledge that I will go back to check on her someday. It's something I know, but don't want to accept. She's moved on, I chanted to myself, and yet… my desire pulsed.

My life up here was good and safe; accepted by the vampire world. I should be grateful. But I've lived a whole century of doing just that, and there was something irresistible about defying that. And Bella being as lovable as she was, only heightened my intense need.

I swallowed my sorrow and took Tanya's hand in mine, to get back to my protected, eternal, life.

So how horrible did I do? lol. Lemme know Review and tell me if you want more. And where I can improve. Also, please no negativity. Just constructive criticism. Thanks.

Love, Jazmine