A/N: You think good sex scenes are hard to write? Try writing fight scenes between characters who you want to be in love. Very stressful. So while I work out the conflicts in the next chapter in the Blown series here's a fluffy bit that kind of dropped from the muse's tangled hair the other day. Warning: Language may be a bit raw for some; hence the M rating. In my mind (and limited experience) this is how real cops would probably sound when among themselves. Somewhat unusual POV.
A Slow Day in Homicide
I must say, every visit of Dr. Isles to the bullpen is a breath of spring. That woman just carries sunshine and seduction wherever she goes. She stops at Jane's desk, they have their usual low-voiced conversation, always while eye-fucking the shit out of each other. I'm surprised they're still both clothed when they're done.
Usually, as she strolls out to the elevators I turn my chair so I can watch her undulate away. I wasn't kidding when I told Jane I'd tried on "all sizes"; but nothing, no one, ever, as stunning as the good Doctor. If you're a guy and don't appreciate her walk, you are not breathin'.
But this morning I was willing to forego that magnificent view to conduct a little scientific observation. Instead of watching Maura, I kept an eye on Jane. Of course, every male in the place locks eyes on the doc as she moves through. But, as I could clearly see, not one of them had an edge on Jane. She didn't just watch, she stared. And her face was just like a kid after a bite of her favorite candy. Pure joy. The thousand-yard stare. The almost hypnotized fixation.
The woman was in deep.
As the doc disappeared around the corner, Jane took a deep breath, a sigh of both reward and resignation. She clearly desired another glimpse of that amazing body. Why not? I knew she was gay. She'd let that out when I asked her why she objected so strongly to that undercover in the gay bar, her post on that lesbian website. It came too close, she said; she didn't want to be outed by accident, and that whole business could have done just that. But I kept my mouth shut. I cared about her, respected her. Maybe even loved her a little.
She caught me watching her. "What the fuck are you staring at?" Way too defensive.
I laughed. "You. You and the way you watch Dr. Isles."
"What do you mean, watch Dr. Isles?" I was just...looking off into the distance. A break from this damn screen."
"Yeah. The distance from your eyes to her ass. Don't bullshit with me, Jane."
"I wasn't staring at her ass!" She was trying to puff up like a pouter pigeon, all threat display and intimidation. "I mean...Maura's really put together, yeah, I notice that. I envy that. But I sure as hell am not ogling her ass!"
"Why not?"
"Wh...Jesus, Frost, have you just got a filthy mind, or what? She's my friend. I respect her too much for that."
"Jane, I guarantee you, when she walks through here she gives every guy a hard-on. She is that good. And I happen to know you appreciate women, as well. Why shouldn't she turn you on, too? You're young, healthy, and horny, right? And...you like her. A little? Yes?"
She slammed her desk, waking Korsak up. "Goddamit, Frost, will you just fuck off! Stay the hell out of my personal life!"
I stayed calm; she was a lot less angry that she seemed to be. "Look, Jane, I'm sorry. Sure, you know what's best for you. But...well, I wouldn't want you to..."
She was intrigued by the unfinished thought. "Want me to...what?"
"Miss out on the best relationship of your life."
"Don't worry, Frost. It's not gonna happen."
Why not? Have you even tried?"
"Tried what? To come on to her? Hell, no!"
"Again I ask, why not? And don't tell me you're not interested in her. That ship has already sailed."
"She's my friend. My best friend. I don't want to fuck that up."
"How?"
"She's straight. Like, every two weeks she's dragging around some new dude. She doesn't look at me that way. If I made a pass at her, it'd be over between us."
I took a musing tone. "Hmmm...I don't think so. I think that, if you were right about her being straight, and you asked her out, say, on a date, the worst that'd happen is she'd tell that she wasn't interested, please don't be hurt, it was just a misunderstanding. You'd still be friends – better, because she'd know about you, and because that whole awkward yes? no? thing was over."
"I don't know, Frost..."
"Wait." I dug out my wallet; I'd had a couple lucky nights at poker. Korsak'd be interested to see where his money was going. I took out two fifties. "Here. I'll put money on it. Fifty bucks says she's not as straight as you think she is. And another fifty says that the worst that happens is what I just said. If you ask her and she says no, and your friendship goes south, at least you're a hundred bucks richer. If she says no and you're still friends, You get fifty. But if she says yes, I get a C-note from you. Okay?"
"Holy shit, Frost, what kind of barbarian are you? You wanna bet on Maura's love life? And mine? You are the lowest of the low."
"And you are just damn chicken, Rizzoli. No balls."
"What if I never ask her?"
Then you lose, Rizzoli, 'cause you are a fuckin' wuss who doesn't deserve the money or the woman."
We were both standing up, leaning across the desks, almost nose to nose. "Them's fightin' words", she said through gritted teeth.
"Yeah. They are. You wanna put your money where your mouth is? Or do you wanna take this outside in the parking lot?"
She dug into her pocket for her wallet (How many women you know carry wallets but not a purse? Come out of that closet, Jane. It's pretty obvious.) She only broke eye contact with me to count out five twenties. She handed them over with lidded eyes and a tensed jaw. "Done?"
"Done." I bundled the bills into an envelope, sealed it.
Korak had been watching this exchange like it was the patriots in the Superbowl. "Hey, Korsak. You wanna hold the money?"
"Sure." I gave it to him. Don't blow it on doughnuts, all right?"
He sneered, tucked it in his desk drawer. "It's good."
Jane turned on Korsak. "If you say anything about this or any part of it to anyone, I will personally remove your balls, barbecue 'em before your living eyes, and feed 'em to whatever mangy mutt you're harboring. You got me?"
Korsak had a hard time not smiling. "Sure, Jane, sure."
At that moment the intoxicating scent of Maura Isles wafted up from behind me. She smiled that luminous smile, mostly at Jane, and Jane suddenly dissolved into sweet bread pudding. "That's quite a threat, Jane. Sergeant Korsak must be in a lot of trouble."
"Nah." Jane was beaming at the doc. "Just a little friendly intimidation. Maura, can I see you in private for a minute?"
"Oh, yes, certainly. Do you want to come down to my office?"
"No, this won't take long. Interview room three open?" She was asking me.
I grinned, still standing, hands in my pockets. "Yeah. Other squads got one and two."
"Thanks." Jane led Maura off, her hand in the small of Maura's back, Maura looking perplexed and a little apprehensive.
Korsak said, "Looks like she's ready to step up."
"You knew?"
"Who doesn't?"
"Both of them?"
"Oh, yeah. This isn't the first wager on those two. You cost me some money, brother. I had next month in the pool."
"I didn't know there was one."
"Sergeants and above only. Didn't want Jane to know."
"Well, excuse me!"
"Hey, Frost, no offense. Anyway, it's over after today."
"Ballsy wager, though."
"Uh-uh. More like a sure thing."
"Yeah." Korsak looked thoughtful. "Yeah, I can see that."
I felt a touch of pride. "Easiest hundred I ever made."
-fin-
