Shadows of Myself

By Miss Strange

*an Iron Giant fanfiction

The 6 Major Personalities

Hogarth – shy, artistic, creative, thoughtful, joyful, and witty

Lucifer – angry, hateful, bully

Devin – sad, anxious, suicidal

James – brave, tough, confident

Sam – sly, hotheaded, self-absorbed, badass

Henry – homicidal, cruel, danger to others and himself

Chapter One

"Mom, I don't want to take my meds!"

"Honey, you have to. It'll make you feel better." Annie Hughes handed the cup and pills to her only son, Hogarth Hughes. After he swallowed and took a swig of water, he ran back outside to play. Annie sighed deeply. She didn't want her son to go through with this but they both knew it was for the best.

Hogarth has a severe multiple personality disorder. It's been this way since he was younger. She discovered his condition after they went to the doctor when he was six. From her last count, he has a total of six personalities. There was one who was angry, sad, and dangerous.

Annie didn't want to believe it at first. She thought her son would never have an awful condition like that. It wasn't until she witnessed a frightening outburst. Hogarth got angry with another kid and tried to choke him. After she finally got him off the kid, he couldn't remember what happened.

From ages five and ten, she had him see a psychiatrist. The doctor prescribed him some pills to help control his other alter egos. Sometimes he would refuse to take them or pretend to swallow them. Hogarth claims the medicine makes him feel sick. So after a while, she talked to the doctor about getting him off the meds. He agreed but now Annie regretted she even brought it up at all.

When he was eleven, he went over to a friend's house one night. After around seven o'clock, he came back with the boy's mother. Annie asked if anything happened and the parent claimed that Hogarth tried to push her son out the window. She added, "Your devil of a son will end up in a Looney Bin if this keeps up."

Annie was deeply upset with that statement. She cried constantly after that; fearing that she was right. She wished her husband was still with her but that will never happen. Her husband died in the war years ago. In the middle of the night, she heard a loud crash. When she went to investigate, Annie found Hogarth on the floor of his bedroom. Behind him was his mirror, which was covered in cracks and blood. She ran over to him and saw that his right hand was covered in ugly cuts and tiny shards of glass. She asked if he was okay. He looked up at her in tears and said in a voice that cut Annie to the core, "What's wrong with me, Mom? I don't even remember doing it."

The next morning, she told Hogarth about his condition. She said it's the reason why he's on meds. He was frightened at first but understood. Hogarth is still adjusting to all of it and he hoped he can overcome it. For a while, it seemed like it did. When the Giant arrived to the town of Rockwell, Hogarth became a normal everyday twelve-year-old. He didn't have any psychotic episodes and he was taking his meds on a regular basis. To Annie, things were finally peaceful in their home.

But after the Giant sacrificed himself for the town, things took a turn for the worse. Hogarth's personality changes got worse. He once tried to throw himself off the roof. He began to smash anything made of glass with his hands and feet. He yelled and curse at other kids. After each episode, he couldn't remember how it happened. It got so bad that Hogarth was sent to a hospital after almost stabbing another kid with a pencil.

After about a week, Annie learned that her son was in isolation for seventy-two hours. Hogarth had to be separated from the other patients because he was in a fight with another adolescent and almost choked him to death. He almost physically attacked several staff and he constantly committed suicide.

Annie tried to visit him several times but the staff told her that he refused to see her. Hogarth was angry at his mother for sending him to the hospital. The last time they saw each other; he pushed her to the ground and told her that he would never forgive her. That broke her heart completely. She was upset that her own son refused to see her.

After two years, the hospital confirmed that Hogarth was ready to be discharged. He was fifteen when Annie came to get him. As she came to take him home, she suspected to see her loving and happy child. But she was greeted by an angry and quiet teenage boy. When they both rode home in her truck, he wouldn't even look at her. After they arrived home, he ran straight to his room with his stuff. Annie told herself that he was getting used to being back home again. At dinner, she tried to make conversation with him.

"You feeling alright, honey?" she asked nervously. "You hardly touched your food."

"Yeah." He answered. She pushed her hair out of her face.

"How was your time in the hospital, sweetie?" she questioned but later regretted saying it.

"You mean the hellhole you put me in?" he replied coldly. Annie tried to take back what she said but Hogarth stood up and walked out of the room without a word. At that moment, she remembered what a mother said to her years ago. Your devil of a son will end up in a Looney Bin if this keeps up. Annie is afraid to admit it but it already happened and feared that it will happen again; very soon.

After a month or so, things didn't get better between them. Hogarth constantly isolated himself in his bedroom. Annie became so afraid of what he was doing that she asked a friend of theirs, Dean to take the door off the hinges. When Hogarth discovered this, he went off the edge. He yelled in her face and accused her of being overprotective. Annie tried to explain but he suddenly pushed her into the wall before she could say anything. Then he walked out.

For days, she cried because she feels that her son was mentally gone for good. Like one of his alter egos replaced him with a rebellious and hateful boy. Annie tried her best to recreate a strong relationship with him but he refused. She suggested that they should talk to someone.

"If you send me to another shrink," he yelled after throwing a glass jug at her. "I swear that you will regret it later on!" She didn't know what to do anymore. She tried to get him to talk to her but Hogarth completely shut her out. Sometimes he stated that living at the hospital was better than this.

Annie sometimes stayed up all night to stare at a picture of her, her husband, and Hogarth. What happened, she'll wonder. When will I see my real son again? She fell asleep hugging that picture; wishing that things will get better.

But deep down, she knew it would never get better. It just began.