A/N: My beta and my Mello's birthday is today, and because of that she asked me to write her a story. Originally, she told me it could be whatever, but that was much too broad, so we finally decided upon a LxLight, having something to do with the beach. I haven't written LxLight in a long time, but even so, I gave it my best to make it as good as it could be. Hopefully she likes it. And hopefully you, the reader, will like it as well! Happy birthday to my lovely, Lumorai~ Please enjoy and let me know what you think!
Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note or any of the characters used in this story.
Title: What Truly Matters
The beach this time of year was always quite empty, as no one ever dared venture out somewhere as unforgiving as this when it was this cold. Winter had set in, and things were quieter between people. There was still the bustle of people in the streets of the city, but people kept to themselves in a desperate attempt to keep in the warmth.
Here, though, there was no one around. Everything was silent except the wind whipping past them and the crashing of dark waters against the coast line. The sky was dark and overcast, promising the first snowfall of the season at any time.
L looked up towards the dark sky, pushing his hands further into his pockets from where he stood a safe distance from the water's edge. He wasn't exactly sure how Light had dragged him down here on a day like this. He vaguely remembered the younger boy talking about how he needed to get out. That he needed to go somewhere that wasn't the city for once.
Looking down at the choppy waters again, L lifted a hand and chewed lightly on the pad of his thumb, 'If I'm not mistaken,' he reminisced, 'I believe it was me that offered to bring him out here…' He sighed, regretting the decision now. But at the time, he couldn't deny that he wanted to get away from everyone too.
There was a lot on his mind right now that he simply could not sort out with everyone around.
He looked down from the water to his arm, which was chained to Light, who stood a few feet over looking out onto the water. There was a part of L that attempted to throw up walls of defense around himself. The enemy was attached to him. They were sharing the same view, perhaps even the same emotions.
And yet, despite as much as he tried, L just couldn't do it. He couldn't put up those defenses and look at Light as nothing more than the player on the other side of his game of justice. He'd already made his moves, and he couldn't take them back.
He also foresaw how all of this was going to turn out. What use was there trying to change it all?
"The game is almost over." L heard himself say before he could catch himself, his dark eyes travelling back out onto the endless expanse of water before them. He wasn't sure what it was about the ocean that mesmerized him. There was a tick in the back of his mind that told him to remember a time long past. But he refused to go back to that time. Not right now.
He felt Light look over at him, confusion present in those dark brown eyes of his. They were always so full of wonder. L couldn't help but think that it was a shame Light, no, Kira was his sworn enemy. Otherwise, the two of them really would make a good team.
He had to give a small smile. Their time together had been good. He'd had a lot of fun on the case and working with Light –seeing what exactly he was capable of, testing him, and more so the wonderful banter back and forth they went through. It was something he'd never had with someone before.
"What do you mean?" Light finally asked him.
L looked over at him once more, "This game that we've been playing, Light-kun." He explained. "It was fun. But we've made our moves, and now it's come to the point where we must figure out how we're going to maneuver with what we have left on the board."
He heard Light sigh, "Are you still going on with that, Ryuzaki? I thought you'd cleared me of suspicions of being Kira!" The annoyance in his voice was heavy, but L didn't let it bother him, just as he didn't every other time Light attempted to reaffirm his innocence.
"I have always known that you were Kira. There is no use trying to pretend now, Light-kun." He said firmly, despite knowing that it would not stop the stubborn college student from trying to convince him of otherwise. He continued before Light could speak, "In every game, someone must always lose, and to lose to the likes of Kira results in the ultimate price. No, to lose on either side brings the same results."
His coal-black eyes flicked over to Light, "Which of us is it going to be?" He wondered, though he already knew in the back of his mind. He was trying to ignore it, however. He didn't want to have to admit that he was playing with only pawns against an enemy with multiple queens on the board.
"Don't be ridiculous." He heard. "We'll both get out of this."
L looked over, giving a small, playful smile, "Come now, Light-kun, I have never known you to be this bad of a liar. You are going to have to do better than that if you're going to try and lead me into a false sense of security."
He felt the glare on him as he turned his look back to the ocean, but said nothing more to his suspect. His friend; perhaps… more. Perhaps that was why he was having such a difficult time trying to pull out all he had to try and win this game.
Or perhaps for the first time since he began taking cases, he simply admitted his own defeat. He shook his head lightly to dismiss the thought; his mess of black hair catching in the wind and blowing back out of his eyes.
The once small tick in the back of his mind suddenly began to overwhelm all of L's senses, but this time he welcomed the memory that tried to make its way to the forefront of his mind. He allowed himself to be whisked off from his world into one that had long past. A time that he had put in the past and left there –left only to be taken out at desperate measures, to remind himself of exactly what it is he was doing.
'Sometimes you must admit when you have lost.' He heard reverberating around in his mind. The voice calmed him, as it always did, and suddenly none of his previous thoughts mattered so much, as the memory took him over and he allowed himself to revisit it.
He was only a child, back then, and did not know what he was doing, how it was done, or even the right steps that needed to be taken in order to get his job done. L had to have only been about seven or eight at the time of the specific incident, but he still remembered it like it was just the other day.
Watari had taken L from Wammy's out on what he called a day trip to see England. He remembered the old man trying to do those sorts of things when he felt any of the orphans, L especially, were being coped up too much.
That day they'd simply went on a drive through the countryside, perhaps so L would be able to say that he had seen his own country before going abroad to see others. The last place Watari took him that afternoon was an abandoned beach.
It was rocky, dark, cold, and the sea warned that anyone who dared enter its black waters would most certainly not be able to find their way out. Even so, L remembered that even back then it was the water that mesmerized him –the rough surf being so foreboding and powerful and merciless to those who crossed its path. And yet carrying with it endless knowledge of the past.
As he stared at it, he remembered thinking to himself only that he wanted to be that someday –or more so he wanted to embody all of those qualities within himself. In the back of his mind, he began running through possible ways to be able to attain it, for at the time he was too naïve to understand that it was the experiences that brought about such qualities and not any sort of individual acts themselves.
He remembered Watari coming up beside him and placing a hand on his shoulder, as if he knew what the boy was thinking. "L," He said, "do you know why I brought you here?"
L simply shook his head no.
"I brought you here because I feel it's necessary for you to know something very important before you are allowed out to take on the world." He gave a small smile that L could see behind his white moustache. "You will be a great asset to this world, once they take notice of your ability to solve crime cases. But the idea that you are something special that the world has never seen before can be something quite daunting, quite isolating."
L's dark eyes moved up to Wammy, "Will I have you, Wammy?" He asked, to which the old man smiled once more and patted his mess of black hair.
"Of course you will. You know that I will always be here to assist you. I simply thought it important for you to know that, even with just me, you are not alone, and you can never lose sight of what you are bringing about as well as making sure you remain humble of where you came out of."
"Nothing…"
The elder man nodded, "You had nothing, and now I have provided you the chance to fulfill what you were meant to do. You have found something that you love. You are great, and through your abilities you are helping countless others down the road be able to have a chance to follow after you." He told him, looking out onto the water.
L looked up at him, confused. "What do you mean?"
"My orphanage will be open for gifted children to hone their abilities to someday take over the title as L." He looked down again at him. "You are starting the line of bringing about true justice in the world, and now it shall be carried on through generations."
The thought of justice covering the Earth made L smile, like he had finally found something truly worth doing with his time and energy. Something he was good at. Something he loved to do. What else was there for him to love as solid as justice itself?
"However," Wammy spoke again, "You must also remember, L, that you are human." Again L looked up in to his caretaker in confusion, but Watari continued before L could speak, "it is not always so important to be correct all the time. Sometimes it is through your own errors and mistakes that you will inevitably come to the correct ending. Sometimes you will just have to admit when you're wrong, and move on to see what happens." He stated.
L was confused about what the elder was attempting to get at, but he knew that if it was important enough for Wammy to say and make sure he knew before beginning his work as L, then it was important enough for him to remember.
He leaned down and picked up a smooth black stone, throwing it suddenly into the surf as far as he could get it to go, then watching the ripples from the spot travel outwards. He smiled at the effect his actions had made; entertained by it in only a way that an innocent child would be. Taking on the world, and cleaning it of all its filth L knew he would not have many moments to enjoy the simple things like this again.
In a way, a part of the message Wammy had told him reverberated around in his mind as he watched ripples. He was the stone that had dropped into the water and the ripples became the effect of all his decisions and relationships with people.
No matter what he did from then on, people would be touched by him and he would leave a lasting effect on the world and the people, but at the same time, he knew that in addition, he needed to make sure that he allowed himself to be touched by others, and affected by their ripples as well.
Everything was interconnected, in the end, but it was important to remain true to what made him happy.
Coming out of his memory L once more began locking it back into his memory bank for safe keeping. 'Sometimes you will just have to admit when you're wrong.' He played over once more in his mind.
'I was not wrong.' He told himself. 'But perhaps I took the wrong course of actions. Perhaps I did make a mistake somewhere that allowed Light-kun the opportunity to get ahead of me.' He looked over once more at the beautiful college student he was chained to. His number one suspect, Kira. It was all the same, but somehow this far into the game all the distinct personalities and sides he had come to see in Light no longer mattered.
'You are right, Watari,' he thought to himself, 'it is about finding something that I love. Every human wants to have that one thing they can love and hold on to.'
Light noticed L watching him and turned to look at him, "What are you starring at?" He asked, as his chocolate eyes molded themselves into a look of confusion as auburn locks of hair fell into perfect place around his face.
L shook his head, unable to stop the content smile, "Nothing, Light-kun."
Light sighed in annoyance. "You're being really weird today, Ryuzaki." He stated. "But anyway, I've had my fill for just standing here. Come on; let's just go for a little walk and then I'll let you drag me back to work for another week." He said with a light hint of humor in his tone.
Instead of dragging the detective but the chain that connected them, however, as L might've suspected he would do, the younger boy instead walked over to him and gently took his hand, leading him down one side of the empty beach.
For once, L was no longer staring mesmerized at the water anymore. His gaze remained locked on Light as a feeling of contentment and ease washed over him –something he had not felt in a great many years, since the weight of the world had fallen upon his shoulders.
He gave a small exhale, accepting the feeling within him, 'You know, Watari,' he thought, 'perhaps I do make mistakes sometimes, and perhaps I did make mistakes with this case. However, despite it all, I believe I have finally found something in addition to justice that makes me just as happy.' He looked ahead of him finally after a moment in which Light looked over and their eyes connected, sharing silent words neither could fully read but both somehow still understood.
'And in the end, Watari, that is what truly matters.'
The End
A/N: Well, there you go, just a little something to meet the birthday challenge of my lovely muse. I basically wrote this just with the theme she gave me, and decided that I would figure out where it went as I wrote it. And this is what came out. Upon finishing it, I felt like there were a lot of lose ends, and that it wasn't as good as I might've been able to do. But maybe that's just me. Maybe I'm wrong. I won't know unless someone tells me. Even so, I hope that everyone enjoyed it! And again, a happy birthday to my amazing beta-muse and wonderful Melly~!
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-Forbiddensoul562
