Hey guys! This is my 2nd story, and I'm hoping It's okay, but I'll never know unless you review (hint, hint)!

Anyway, as the summery states, this takes place right after Thalia is brought back in the end of the Sea of Monsters (I believe that is the book. Please forgive me if I'm mistaken!) She's frustrated and gets to thinking...and these are her thoughts regarding earlier on in her life.

Lemme know if you like it, because I'm considering making two more chapters for this, one concerning her feelings after she finds out Luke has sided with the Titans, and one concerning her feelings after she realizes that Annabeth has grown up a bit, and doesn't need Thalia like she used to...Yes? No? Let me know in a review ^.^

Anyway, here it is and I hope you enjoy!

The world is filled with sick illusions. It's set up to make you look at some people in awe, and believe that they have everything. It's also set up to make you look down at the others with pity for their misfortunes. It's annoying. Thankfully I know better. None of the "joys in life" ever actually existed. "All you need is love"? Please. There's no such thing. It's just Aphrodite messing with your head. "Your family will always be there for you"? Yeah right. As long as you stay on Hera's good side. Peace is never permanent. Ares' makes sure of that. All the good fortune you seem to have at one time or another will be gone soon. Nemesis will see to it. You can't depend on anyone. Not a single person, no matter how trustworthy they seem. End of story. Most demigods still don't get it. When the world comes crashing down around them they won't understand. That's part of the illusion. It's much stronger than the Mist. It makes you stupid. All people are anymore, are pawns to the gods' and titans'.

Even now, as I sit in my cabin at Camp Half-Blood, I know that the only reason I am here now is because of Kronos. If I hadn't been decided "useful", I wouldn't be alive. I would still be a pine tree. Yet I have no control. There is nothing I can do to stop myself from becoming a pawn. Nothing good ever comes out of life. Love betrays you. Friends grow apart. Family...well, take my family for instance.

My mother was a Hollywood starlet. She was also an unstable, alcoholic, vain, insecure mortal. My father? Well...yeah. You probably already know. Who doesn't know the story? The King of the gods, the ruler of Mount Olympus, One of the Big Three, blah blah blah, Zeus. So the few times he was around was when he got sick of Hera and wanted to treat my mom like a queen. He ignored me, but those times were still okay. Mom was...almost stable. But then he would leave again, saying that he had out of control gods, goddesses, nymphs, spirits, satyrs, and other things to go deal with. Those were the worst of times. Without Zeus around my mother tended to drink a lot more. She would get drunk, practically throw tantrums. She would hit me, and tell me that I've chased him off and that I've ruined her life. Mom of the year, right? Well anyway, one time it really got bad. "He'll never come back Thalia! He's gone for good! You don't care, do you? You're just a selfish little brat who doesn't even care for your own mother's happiness! I could die and you still wouldn't care!" she screamed at me, wine glass in hand. Then she broke down sobbing. I went upstairs and left her to it. I know what you're thinking, "what kind of daughter would leave her poor, depressed mother alone?". Well you know what? She never had second thoughts and apologized for blaming me. She was never sorry for how she treated me. She hated me. She never once told me she loved me. She never once comforted me when I needed it. Why should I care if she had one of her meltdowns again? She didn't want me. She didn't need me. That's the one thing we could agree on.

One day, months later, I woke up to laughter and the smell of pancakes. When I went downstairs I saw it. Her. Him. Them. Zeus had come back. Must have had a spat with his immortal wife. Again. This time instead of pretending I wasn't there, he looked at me, his face changed, leaving no trace of a smile and gave me a slight nod. It was like he wasn't sure whether to think of me as a daughter, or as a inconvenience. My mother was smiling and seemed to be in good spirits. Why wouldn't she be? Zeus acted as if she was the greatest person to ever walk the face of the earth. He showered her with flowers, food, clothes, jewels, and everything else she wanted. Well, almost everything. He wouldn't make her eternally beautiful, nor would he take her to Olympus. The two things she wanted that she just couldn't have. Anyway, Weeks later, It was announced that I was to be a big sister.

After Jason was born Zeus (who had seemed to have changed his behavior a bit) actually visited regularly. He didn't pay too much attention to either of us, but it was the most attention he's ever showed me. Not that I cared. Because I didn't. I was too busy raising my baby brother, while our parents went out to parties, or dinner or whatever. Ha, I bet it was a sight, me being an eight year old "mom" and all.

Little Jason didn't too look much like me. He had a pale complexion, and his hair was blonde, like our mother's. He looked very much like our mother, where as I looked like our father. The one thing that stood out and made you believe that we were related were his eyes. People would marvel (and sometimes still do) that they've never seen such captivating and blue eyes as mine. That it almost seemed as if electricity was pulsing through them, making them glow. Jason had them too.

Jason and I became very close. Though he was just a toddler, he was incredibly smart and alert. He knew when mother would start having her fits, that it was time to drag all of his crayons, markers, pencils, along with my notebooks, and stuff them in our little homemade tent which was always made out of sheets, pillows and blankets. He would hide out until I was able to be there with him to comfort him. When he was scared he looked to me for help and guidance. He liked to go through my CD collection when he was bored, and when it came time to nap he insisted I was there. I never minded. He was the only good thing in my life.

I remember the day Zeus left us for good. I was nine and Jason had just turned two. It was storming outside. Jason and I were hiding upstairs in Jason's room, under our homemade tent. Jason was scribbling with crayons, taking the chance to ruin my last good notebook. Downstairs, they were arguing again. She was screaming as loud as she could, while he was mostly quiet. Crash! There does another wine glass. "You can't leave me!" Crash! What else broke this time? "That's it? Your going to leave me to deal with two children? By myself?" She was going into hysterics. I heard a quiet voice from Zeus. Something about a "Camp Half-Blood". Whatever he said didn't seem to soothe her. She went on screaming again. About twenty minutes later I heard the front door slam. All I could hear now was my mother sobbing.

Seven months later (I was now ten), my mother announced she wanted to take us to the park for a picnic.. That was very out of character for her, but whatever, why not? Looking back, I wish I would have said no. I wish she had some movie to shoot, or some party to attend. But no, we went. Just the three of us. Alone. In an empty park.

"Thalia, I left the blue blanket in the car. Be a dear and go get it for me." She looked at me as if she were mad, but she was being oddly calm. Then I noticed how nervous she was acting. I didn't want to leave her alone with Jason...but it was only for a minute. I then made the worst decision of my life. I did what she asked. I was gone for literally three minutes. When I came back my mother was sobbing "He's gone! He's dead! She's taken him! She's going to kill him!" At first I was confused. Who was dead? Who was gone? Then I realized what was wrong. Jason was nowhere in site. Instantly I was filled with panic. I searched and searched but couldn't find him anywhere. My mother just stood there. There was nobody around to help. He was gone. "Where is Jason?" I demanded, crying by now. "What did you do with him?" I begged. "I... I had no choice! She...she...was going to kill me. And now he's...he's gone." Eventually my mother composed herself as best she could and began dragging me to the car to go home. Me screaming, crying, and demanding to be let go all the way. "THALIA! Stop it! He's as good as dead!" No. No he couldn't be! "We have to look for him!" I demanded, but even then I knew it was no use.

My stupid, stupid, mother, in order to save her own life, had given my little brother to Hera. Jason, the only good thing in my life. The only reason I wanted to live. Little Jason, who was always so happy, and who didn't understand how bad he'd had it, being without decent parents.

After that day I hated my mother more than I ever had before. I wished Hera had finished the job she had come for that day. But no, she had taken my beloved brother's life instead. For that, I hated Hera just as much. My sweet little Jason. I would never see him again. I would never see his big toothy grin again. The days when I was feeling really depressed, and he would come hug me, even when he had no clue what was going on...those days were over. That's when I made the decision that had been in the back of my mind.

I had to leave.

I had to get out.

I had to get away.

I had to escape.

Again, it would REALLY mean a lot to me if you would review, and tell me if I should continue with my Luke and Annabeth idea!