"You're all probably wondering why I have gathered you here today," Yusuke announced formally.
Ryuji glanced around the inside of Leblanc while Futaba continued tapping away on her phone. It was only the three of them inside the restaurant, why was he talking like he was in front of a crowd?
"Um… Okay," the blonde-haired boy replied slowly.
Yusuke drew in a deep breath, preparing to speak but before he could get out another word, he hunched over, clutching his heart dramatically.
"I…" His voice shook, as if the next sentence he was about to say terrified him, "I'm afraid… that I am a father."
The statement managed to grasp the full attention of both of his friends. Futaba blacked out her phone, "What was that?"
Leaning forward in his seat at the booth, Ryuji pressed, "For some reason, I thought I heard you say that you were a father."
Yusuke straightened his posture and cleared his throat, regaining his composure as best as he could, "It is true. I believe I have a child."
Futaba took a sip of her cocoa, letting it warm her throat before setting it back down on the table, "Alright, alright, alright. Start over. What happened?"
"Yeah," Ryuji piped up, "You've never said anything about being with a girl before. You can't have a kid. It's impossible."
"That it what I thought," Yusuke agreed, "But… today at school, a girl referred to me as her father in the hall."
The restaurant went silent besides the faint sound of the television and the bubbling of the coffee siphons. Then, all at once, laughter erupted from both of Yusuke's friends.
Yusuke furrowed his brow, "This is no laughing matter! Can you not see the crisis I am in?"
Futaba removed her glasses and wiped away her tears, "Okay, tell us exactly what this girl said to you."
"Well, I was walking down the hall, going from art history to ceramics, when a girl I had never seen before walked past me and said 'Hey, daddy.'"
Futaba rose from her seat and patted a hand on Yusuke's back, guiding him to sit down, "Yusuke, you're not a father."
Yusuke raised an eyebrow, "Are you sure?" Futaba nodded a response, "Then, why would she lie about such a thing?"
"Listen, I know most pretty boys aren't that smart but are you seriously that stupid?" Ryuji questioned, "She was calling you hot, you idiot," The blonde crossed his arms, pouting, "Man, I can't believe you got a girl to call you 'daddy' before me."
"Yeah, like that'd ever happen," Futaba snorted, earning a middle finger from Ryuji.
Blinking slowly, Yusuke tilted his head curiously, "So… I'm not a father?"
"Hell no!" Ryuji exclaimed.
"Stupid Inari…"
