Pillars
Chapter 1
Different Nature
I'm not sure when I realized it but for a long time I've known I happen to be different. My so called older brothers, I'm not sure if that's a good word, because they all look like me, all sound like me. The only differences are they are all crazy and I'm not their age. I don't know when I came about I can't remember that far but for some reason I'm not the same age as they are.
Everyday they stalk the halls of this old vault whispering 'Gary' at the shadows. I don't understand it. I'm not sure they do either. Every now and then the others stop and look down at me like I don't belong. Or like they aren't sure about me.
At this moment in time, I'm not sure of myself either. They are violent, no one that came in went back out. Sometimes they took their frustrations out on each other and even myself. But they never killed anyone that shared our face.
Then one day, this day, it all changes.
Today our ritual of wandering the halls is broken by gunfire. I should have fought with them, could have fought beside them. But I didn't want to die like them. I kept my head down. This intruder, I showed him no reason to end my life as he did my brothers.
It's a strange moment for us both. He looks at me like my brothers do. Unsure. He passes me by after a moment of silence. The breath I withheld dispersed in a swift exhale and I sat down holding my head.
He came back after a time and I had to will my lungs to keep working. I stare at his boots, black, with a fresh coat of blood. The same kind of blood flowing through my body, covered this man. Slowly I shift my gaze upward, more of the same shiny crimson.
One of them got a hit in, the stranger's head has a gash that wasn't there before. Under his half destroyed greaser haircut, a wound released a waterfall of his own blood.
I don't know why, but he sat in front of me on the floor. Then, hands me a roll of gauze and clips. I had to stare at the items for a moment. I still don't know why I react the way I do.
He sighs and reaches for the items but I pull them away. It was clear, this stranger wants my help bandaging his head. I bite my lip, and unroll the gauze.
I can't stop myself. I'm helping someone who came into my home and killed my so called family.
"Can you say anything besides your name?" He asks me. He was speaking an actual sentence. One I could understand, but I cant copy.
All I can do is shake my head. I feel pathetic. I have this awareness but no way to convey it to someone else.
"If you aren't crazy like they are, why are you still here?" He then asks.
It's a valid question. One I ask myself many times. All I do is shrug and shift my gaze away for a moment before finishing the wrap and clipping it tight.
Being here is, was safe. They kept me safe with their anger. With their clouded minds I was able to live.
"I'm sorry." He kept his eyes on me as I worked. "I guess you will be alone now." He said as if offering his condolences for something he didn't do.
The word 'alone' hit me deep in the gut. I dropped my hands in my lap looking at them sadly. I think he saw it, the sadness and fear that crossed my face.
He looks away when I look toward his face, and stands up. I don't know why I reached out and grabbed his pant leg. I'm sure he does, because he smiles softly at me and extends his hand to me. I stood and without a word but a small smile gracing his face he turns to leave. He doesn't stop me from following, so I do.
My first time seeing daylight. It hurt. So many years spent in the dimly lit halls of my vault took its toll. I think I whined a little at the pain because the stranger put a pair of glasses on my face that had dark lenses. It still hurt but I was able to ease my eyes open and see the outside. The world was large, barren, just as dead as my family I was leaving behind.
"Come on, there's more to see." I hadn't noticed him walk away but he had stopped to wait for me. And I quickly caught up.
It is amazing all the things left behind. The overseer's room said there was nothing left. I wondered if anyone knew it was still there, or if my brothers had killed them all before they could find out.
~-,-~
We journed for a few days. It was rough, he barely took any breaks almost as if he didn't need to. I wish I could talk to him but I know the only thing that will come out of my mouth is 'Gary'. There were times it seemed he wanted to talk to me too but he never spoke past the odd glance in my direction. I suppose he already knew what my responses would be just as much as I did.
His only words to me were direction. When to hide, when to run, which way to go when we were under attack. I dont even know what his name is yet. Three days and he's still a stranger. I also began to wonder where he was taking me. How long before the silence between us got to him and he just left me somewhere. Alone.
The word became more reality when I heard the broadcasts from his Pip-boy. But I now had a few names or titles for him instead of intruder, stranger, and the darker: murderer. But now I knew him as 'That crazy vault kid from 101' or 'The lone wanderer' that's when it hit me. There are reasons people are given certain names just how I was named Gary after who we all were. He was alone. How often I wondered. When would he keep to his namesake and decide to be alone again.
I'm not sure if he read my mind, during the evening but when we slowed to eat, "My name is Blake." He spit out. I looked around for a moment before my eyes rested on him in the dim light of the fire. He had been watching me too. "Do you like the name Gary?" He then asked as if the name was irritating to him.
I looked down then back to meet his gaze and shrugged. I wouldn't know if I liked the name or not its the only name I've ever heard. It was said on a daily basis and the only thing communicated to each other throughout all the years I existed.
"Why don't you choose a new name?" All I could do was look at him. I didn't know any other names but his now. I don't even know if I could say that. He took a bite of something on a stick "How about Ted?" I scrunch my nose at it, he laughs "Gorge?" I thought and shook my head. "Trent" I raised a brow and he went on. "Paul, Brandon, Mark, Frankā¦" I let out a chuckle, and he did too. " So I guess its just Gary huh?" He asks me with a sigh. I dont know why it feels embarrassing but I feel stupid and nod.
It isn't long before we are moving again. "Hey Gary, how old are you?" He asks and I have to hold up fingers. "Eighteen." He confirms and I nod. "I'm only nineteen, I guess we have that in common." I didn't know what to do so I just continue to listen to him while watching him. I was unsure why he became so talkative. Maybe the thought I would suddenly be able to communicate with him if he spoke enough.
~-,-~
The journey he led us on, brought us to the gates of a settlement. I could see people I had never seen. After years of the same face, it was a nice change. I tapped his shoulder "Gary?" I asked pointing to the bomb settled in the center of the town.
He looked at me a moment realizing that was the first time I've spoke since he invaded my vault. Then he answered me. "It's a deactivated nuke."
We walked toward it but then away at the bottom of the steep decline of the bank. He stood at a door and he tells me to wait outside. I was curious but I didn't want to give him any reason to want to ditch me, so I stay put outside. I don't know how long I waited but he came back out and motioned for me to follow. The walkways were trying and confusing, up and down, left and right, zigzags. All metal so it was hard to tell where one began and the other ended, or even which way they were going. Keeping up was hard for me, I wanted to see everything and everyone.
Before I knew it we were at a large building on the backside of the crater. "Gaaary?" I asked a bit worried, pointing at the sign.
He turns grabs my hand and pulls me inside "Don't worry about it. This will be fun!" He exclaims. It was like he changed into a different person. No longer sullen and sharp, but carefree and youthful.
I cough at my first breath of the atmosphere in the room. Only one of my brothers smelled like this, but not to this degree. Smoke, and noise hit me like I ran into a wall but Blake kept pulling me in. I caught the edge of a sticky counter and look around.
The noise is loud, Blake is also yelling at me but I couldn't hear him that well.
"GARY?" I ask as loud as I can over the noise and all he does is laugh.
He leans over the counter and spoke to a man that was wrong looking. His skin was burnt, and his eyes are clouded, and he had no nose or hair. Whatever Blake said to him caused the man to nod and gave him two glasses filled halfway with dark brown water. I looked at it suspiciously when he hands me the glass. But he just drank it as fast as he could. I smelled it and it smelled gross. I cringed. Blake grinned widely at me and guided it to my mouth urging me to drink it. I grimaced but took his lead and drank it like he did. It was gross. I coughed, the taste took my breath away but made my stomach rather warm.
I look at him with a disgusted face and he held up a hand. Took my glass and had the man fill it and his backup. He hands it to me again and looks at me, gesturing to watch him. I did, he made it look easy. Drinking whatever this stuff was was not easy at all.
After a third glass, I felt warm all over. My face felt as though it could burn holes in things, and I couldn't stand well. My vision was also questionable. Everything looks as though I'm looking through the bottom of a glass. Standing became a chore, the sticky counter kept me steady. When Blake tries to hand me another glass I refuse but he, in all his grinning stupor, forced it down my throat.
I feel sick, I don't know what to do at this point. I turn to leave, stumbling my way back to the door. Pushing the door open the cool air from outside brushes my face and felt too nice. Blake followed me out and shoved, pushing me forward, I wasn't prepared and fell to my hands and knees. All he did was laugh and fall beside me on the walkway.
"This was fun, I don't have anyone my age to hang out with. Thanks man." He says lying on his back and tapping me in the side.
All I can do is nod but that makes me feel even worse "Gary." I offer as a you're welcome.
He bursts into laughter. His cheeks are bright red. I could only imagine mine were like that and he sighs "Hey, Say 'Gary" all creepy like the others did." He looks at me with wide and glassy brown eyes.
I look back my eyes the same but a question mark attached. He rolls his eyes and sits up, and pats my shoulder. "You know like 'Gaaarrrryyy?'" He explains.
This time I roll my eyes yeah it was pretty creepy the way they said that. It was usually when someone broke into the vault. So I humor him "Gaaaaaaarrrrrryyyyy" I say trying my best to mimic them and what he was asking me to.
His laughter booms out of him and he falls at me. "That was fucking creepy man." He says, making me laugh as well.
Blake asks me to repeat it several more time before we somehow stumbled back to the door he made me wait outside of. I bide my lip as he let's me go and puts his hand on the knob. I wait as I did earlier and he turns around "What are you doing come on." He motions for me to follow. And I do.
