Notes: This is my first A-Team fanfic. I recently watched "Mind Games" on Netflix, and I really felt like there needed to be more introspection on Face's part. The show always shows the Team bouncing back from a situation, looking like whatever happened just slid off their shoulders. This episode really screwed with Face's head, and I feel like he needs more time to bring himself back. I've also taken some creative liberty at the beginning of this fic. It doesn't pick up exactly where the episode ended.
The moment they'd found out Face's pardon had been revoked, Hannibal had forced them all into the van, and they made tracks out of town. Face gave B.A. directions to a private condo he'd been staying at, right on the beach. It would get Fulbright off their trail for a little while.
The drive to Face's condo took two hours. With the exception of giving B.A. a driving direction, Face remained silent the entire journey. He still hadn't the nerve to face Hannibal, after everything that'd happened, and the Colonel hadn't fully addressed it yet. He knew there'd be a conversation... he just wasn't ready for the Colonel's military-style talking to just yet.
As soon as the van pulled into the small parking lot that housed the condo, Face got out and went inside ahead of the others, muttering his apartment number to them as he walked away. No one bothered to follow. They were all miffed over Face's attitude over the past week. They also knew that Face would need some time to himself, to process everything.
Face quickly unlocked the door and went into the condo. It wasn't as fancy as he'd been used to, but it was spacious, and had three bedrooms and a pullout couch, so everyone would have their own place to sleep. He headed down the hall to the master bedroom and threw open the door. A large window framed the ocean outside as the waves crashed onto the shoreline.
He closed the door behind him, knowing Hannibal would likely come to check on him, and strode angrily across the room. He stopped in the middle, unsure of what to do with himself. There was so much anger boiling inside of him, anger that he hadn't felt since his return from Vietnam. He was angry with himself.
In a fit of rage, Face swept his arms across his dresser, sending a lamp across the room. It hit the floor in the corner and smashed. Among the items that had made their way to the floor were a gold watch he'd forgotten he left there, and a small black box, now lying open on its side. Spilling out of the box was a clear crystal Rosary.
Breathing heavily as he came down from his fit of anger, he bent down and picked up the Rosary. Father McGill had given it to him when he was a child. It had always been of great comfort to have the Rosary with him. He'd left it with Father McGill when he shipped out to Vietnam, afraid that he might lose it forever. He visited the Orphanage when he returned, and although he had it back, the Rosary hadn't helped him get past the horrors he'd experienced.
Clutching the Rosary in his left hand, Face dropped to his knees.
"What have I done?" he asked, looking upward. "I've been a damned fool... I betrayed my friends... I let my guard down, and almost got myself killed... I've screwed up, Father."
Face bowed his head and started to recite the Hail Mary. He hadn't prayed in so long... he needed this, more than anyone could ever know.
Hannibal rested his hand on the doorknob to Face's bedroom, but froze when he heard his Lieutenant's voice, reciting a prayer. The team never spoke of faith with each other, but Hannibal knew from personal experience that prayer could help to heal wounds. He let his hand fall from the doorknob, and turned away from the bedroom. Face needed some time.
It was late when the back bedroom door opened. Face emerged and quietly made his way down the hall toward the living room. He stopped short when he saw Hannibal sitting in one of the armchairs, reading a newspaper. Face quietly attempted to retreat to the hallway.
"Lieutenant."
Face stopped. When Hannibal used his rank, rather than his moniker, he couldn't ignore him.
"I know what you're going to say, Hannibal," he said without turning around.
Hannibal lowered his newspaper.
"What is that, Lieutenant?"
Face turned around, but did not make eye contact with Hannibal.
"I screwed up."
"Agreed."
"Good talk." Face turned and started to retreat to his room again.
"Lieutenant!"
Face stopped again.
Damn him... pulling rank on me at a time like this.
"Come in here and sit down. We need to talk."
Face sighed and took a seat on the couch, nearest to Hannibal. He still hadn't made eye contact with his C.O.
"What's bothering you?"
Face remained silent, choosing to stare out the picture window to his right, at the waves. How could he face Hannibal, Murdock or B.A. after what he had done? He was surprised Hannibal was even making an attempt, militant as it was.
"Why are you talking to me?" Face said, without looking at him. "As soon as I heard about the pardon, I packed up and took off. I abandoned my only friends in the world. Yet here you all are, in my apartment. Why?"
Hannibal set down his newspaper on the coffee table.
"Lieutenant, if you're going to talk to me, I want you to turn around and look at me. I'm not going to talk to the back of your head."
Face turned and made eye contact with Hannibal for the first time that evening. The Colonel looked annoyed with him.
"I screwed up, Hannibal," Face admitted. "I took my pardon and abandoned you all, and when you tried to tell me, I blew you off. I got cocky, and I almost got myself killed."
"You let your guard down, Face, and that was a stupid thing to do."
Face looked down at his hands.
"Yes, Sir."
"Look at me, Lieutenant, not your hands."
Face brought his eyes back up.
"If I were in your place, I probably would have gone off too, Face. Probably would have taken as many movie roles as they could hand me. The difference between you and me is that you let your ego swell, and when we found you, it was the size of a hot air balloon. Your ego clouds your judgment."
"I'm sorry."
"This isn't the only time it's happened, either. Remember that fake movie premiere you put together?"
Face nodded.
"It was in the newspaper. Decker found me. If you hadn't been there, I'd-"
"Your ass would have been in jail so fast it'd make your head spin."
Face nodded quietly.
"I'm not always going to be there to help you, Face. You need to stow your ego. One of these days you're going to get yourself caught, and a military prison isn't a place we can break into to save your ass. Am I clear?"
"Yes."
"Good. Two weeks restriction. You don't go anywhere alone, and I want to know where you are at all times."
"Aw, come on Hannibal... we're not really in the Army anymore."
"We're still a team, and we all need to be on our A-game. You brought this on yourself, Face, and you're going to take it, so stop whining."
"Yes, Sir."
Face shifted uncomfortably on the couch.
"What's the matter?"
"We're still friends, right?"
"If we weren't, you'd be dead instead of having this conversation."
Face nodded.
"I really am sorry, Hannibal."
"I know you are." Hannibal checked his watch. "It's nearly midnight. Get some sleep."
"I'm not tired."
"Maybe not, but you'll need your strength to run from B.A. tomorrow. You can guarantee he's going to have something to say."
Face gulped. B.A. usually let his fists do the talking.
"I guess I could try to get some rest."
"Good man."
Face got up and started back to his room, while Hannibal pulled out the couch bed for himself. It would take some time, but Face hoped his team would eventually trust him again.
END
