A Face of Many

Only when he's completely alone, completely isolated from the prying eyes of the world, is when he takes off the mask of Zero. Only when everyone has left and his chambers are locked and the curtains drawn is when he reveals his true face.

In the bathroom, after he takes a shower, the mirror that hangs on the wall is covered in layers of mist. He rarely allows himself to look at the face hidden under the blank black mask. On the nights he does, his dreams are bright with color, vibrant shimmering hues, glowing with unspoken wishes. He'll see the people that meant the world to him.

Tonight, he allows himself to take a peek of the real person underneath. Messed brown hair, matted down from wearing the mask constantly, green eyes darkened from years of sadness and pain reflect back. The normally tan skin has faded considerably, but remains the natural Asian tan that all Japanese possess. He doesn't know what to call himself now. Is he Suzaku Kururugi? Or is he someone else? The face that stares back at him has many names: Private, Warrant Officer, Princess Euphemia's Knight, Knight of Seven, Knight of Zero, White Reaper, White Knight, Lancelot, Knight of Betrayal.

His eyes blink uncertainly, unaccustomed to the glaring LED lights in the bathroom without the dark covering of the mask impeding his vision slightly. Once he's done brushing his teeth, he double checks to make sure no one has sneaked in a spy camera, checks the doors and curtains, then pulls the sheets of his bed down.

As his eyes close, slumber casting its gentle voice across the room, he thinks about everything and nothing. He thinks about the new world that Lelouch and he... no, just Lelouch, created. The cycle of hate was broken, the way he thought it would before he was forced by the perils of life to give up his ideals.

That night, his dreams are vivid, thousands of colors exploding in his vision with a force enough to make any person step back in awe and wonder. He catches many colors. The pink that reminds him of Euphie's hair, the violet and black that makes him remember Lelouch. He sees the cerulean blue eyes of Gino, and the fiery red hair of Kallen. He notices the green of Shirley's eyes, and the light brown that both Nunnally and Rolo possessed as a hair color. He'll see Rivalz blue hair, and Milly's bright blonde, Cecile's purple and Loyd's white. He'll see the soft red of Anya's eyes, the lime green of C.C.'s hair and the yellow and black shades that remind him of Ashford Academy.

When he wakes up from dreams like those, his eyes are always set in determination, and the words he speak the next day are powerful and strong. He remembers a silent promise everything he thinks of those that lost their lives, those that kept him holding on to life even if only for a moment. He'll live out their dreams for them because they were the ones that give him his dreams.

He'll live out the dreams for the people that can't live out theirs.

His father dreamed of strength, never losing to Britannia. His dream died with him, at the hands of his son, him. Genbu Kururigi was a strong men, one whose pride often marred his compassion for others. Even as he argued with his son, before he was killed, he knocked his son down with a slap, sending him sprawling to the floor, fueling the boy's anger, causing a blade to be jabbed through his stomach. His dream ended there, when Britannia took over, and although the Japanese people surrendered without a fight, saving hundreds, if not thousands, of lives, his dream never happened. The Japanese were slaves to a corrupt oppressive empire, and there was nothing he could do. His son promised to free Japan, and now Japan was free. The Prime Minister can rest in peace now.

Shirley dreamed of being able to shoot off fireworks with all of her friends. She dreamed of a world where all her friends were there with her, laughing and relaxing. He didn't really know exactly how to live out Shirley's dream, but once a year, on the anniversary of Shirley's death, he dons his mask, takes Nunnally to Ashford Academy, then underneath layers of darkness, where it's impossible to see his face, he lays down his mask and lights fireworks with Nunnally and the others that knew who he once was. He knew Shirley hated the lies, the masks, so he never wears his mask when he shoots fireworks. And every year, he sends a silent hello and prayer to her, hoping that she knows he's doing the right thing, that he forgave Lelouch, just like she wanted. The fireworks always seem a little brighter after he says those few words.

Rolo dreamed of being human. This is another dream he's not sure how to live out. But, when ever he leaves meetings with corrupt politicians who sometimes make immoral and evil demands, he reminds himself that he's not a toy that can be used. He's meant only to be a symbol of justice, but he reminds himself everyday that he's only human. And this, he's happy about.

Lelouch. This name brings memories, both filled with happiness and sorrow. He thinks of Lelouch Lamperouge, the overprotective brother and lazy school genius. He thinks of all the times they played at the Kururigi Shrine, their first meeting, and all the times when they could just laugh and hang out, untouched by the horrors of war, and the betrayals of friends and foes. His short time spent with the political hostages before the war, and at Ashford before Zero's identity was revealed with his closest friend, the one person he thought he would never betray, was one of his dearest and happiest times, when the world seemed so happy.

Then there was Lelouch vi Britannia. The tyrannical ruler that destroyed all his hopes and killed so many. He loathed this part of Lelouch, but in the end, this person sacrificed his life for the sake of the world. He'll never be able to thank Lelouch, and he won't, but nonetheless, he's still grateful. So in return, as promised, he'll continue Lelouch's dream, of a better world for Nunnally where nothing can harm her. He'll monitor the shaky peace and continue protecting those that need him the most. Lelouch will rest in peace.

Euphie, the only girl he ever really loved, who died at a age far too young. Her dream was almost identical to his. Although he was a lowly Japanese, an eleven, she understood everything about him, and made him happy. Her dream was to see people smiling again, a peaceful world where no one would have to lose loved ones ever again. He lives her dream everyday, every second, all the time. When people riot or fight, he's there to quell the anger and calm down the people. When he sees a family broken from the death's of loved ones through war, he does all in his power to make them smile. He, who after her death, only smiled on the rare occasions, now tries to spread smiles throughout the world.

Euphemia li Britannia was the most important thing to him, even if they only knew each other for a short period. She was his princess, he was her knight. They each longed for peace, and end to the pain and suffering. They followed their hearts, both impulsive, both kind and gentle. They had the same dream, and their methods were near identical. But then Zero had accidentally geassed her, and all those dreams fell apart. But now, now people are laughing again. Now, they get to hug their loved ones without thinking that they won't live till the next day. People are happy.

She would have smiled.

The next morning, he allows himself a peek one more time in the mirror. He still sees the same face, tired and worn, but filled with passion for a more peaceful world. The world won't ever see Suzaku Kururugi's face, just a blank face, but some say, if you looked close enough, you could see the faces of the deceased.

While this is also his punishment, giving up the small things that people may take for granted, but make people joyful, he thinks that this is also his chance to live his dream. He wanted peace, he wanted freedom. Now, while he lives his dream, he will live others that didn't get the chance to live theirs in the new world.

Although he's just one person under a faceless mask, he'll live out the dreams of more than just him. So, on the days he allows himself to see his face, he sees more than just Suzaku Kururugi, a man supposedly dead and gone. He sees his friends, their dreams, and their smiles meshed in to one. He may not be the man he once was, but underneath the mask, he still is Suzaku Kururugi, just with a few more dreams attached.

And even if people see only one face, he's still a face of many.

This is my first time writing fanfiction for Code Geass. When I was first introduced to it, I was hooked, and then became obsessed, which then led to this. Well, I'm sorry this isn't any good, but please tell me what you think. I don't own Code Geass. (Actually, if you think about it, I'm obviously an English speaker with no idea what the Japanese do, so therefore, I can't be the owner. Don't get me wrong, I'm not racist, just ignorant.)